Did getting married reduce your Asperger's 1% or so?

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My fiancee is my social coach. The awkward moments don't decrease in quantity, but they decrease in how awkward they are. We watch period drama movies like "Wives and Daughters" and he helps me understand what's going on.

Financial reasons, like tax, financial aid, healthcare, etc. It's a very practical convention, until divorce.

As I said, there are very few reasons where I am to get married. It would have to be a fairly hefty financial benefit for me to abandon my principles, that marriage as an institution is to me both worthless and unnecessary. Sorry to bang on about but I just don't get it No insult intended to those who do

My ex-wife only made the AS worse. However i have since known a few women who taught me a lot about socializing. My girlfriend is really good about it and I have been way more social because of her. i still need my down time but I like spending that with her.

I do not believe marriage changed my AS. The only thing I can say is that I don't have as much totally alone time in the house. Sometimes I have to find a quiet part of the house. But marriage has been wonderful for me. And I have two great sons.

I think I'm lucky somebody loves me.

[quote="Willard"]Reduce my AS? Not in the slightest. Made it a thousand times worse.

It made me more irritable, confined and put upon.
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My partner was always the biggest source of anxiety in my life.




My sentiments exactly............btw my marriage only lasted 3 months

I have been with my wife since age 17 in school (28 years), but I can say without any doubt that we have different strengths and weaknesses that fit together very well. I cope very badly without her support, so she compensates more for me than I do for her, to the point that AS is not a problem in many situations.

Children too are a huge help - I find that I am able to go out to places and do things with my children that I find very hard on my own. Children also have an egocentric view of normality, so they don't even see AS (or any kind of differences) in their parents until they grow up.

Well.... in some ways, "marriage" changed me (in quotations here because we only got officially married this past Jan, we've been together for almost 7 years and have children together). When I reflect on my life previous to meeting my wife, I remember nothing but rushing back and forth from high school/college (when I attended) to shut myself in my house/apartment. I was in a real big hurry to stay the hell away from anyone. This surely stunted any social development I could have attempted to undergo during my teen years, and it was nothing but sheer loneliness, depression, and self-preservation (suicide avoidance) that forced me to reexamine what I was doing and venture out into the world a bit. I took a job at Blockbuster, fell in love with my boss, and we've been together since.

...And then the changes came. I was constantly being forced into situations that caused me severe anxiety. We moved to another state where nothing was familiar and suddenly I was living with this person that I realized I barely knew... and who didn't know me. For many years I disguised who I was completely (I'm good at playing NT, I could play one in a movie). I offset this with long periods of alone time to re-normalize, and eventually this lead to her becoming very distant and cheating multiple times. I didn't know what was wrong with me, which eventually lead me to the AS conclusion. I don't know if marriage (co-habitation) has permanently changed me in any way, but I certainly spend the majority of my life doing things that I would never do on my own. After working out what was "wrong" with me, she became much more supportive of my situation and how I dealt with things, so perhaps this story will have a happy ending.

Yes.

Right, I was going to post with this response. Because a 1% change would mean no major characteristic of AS would be lost. And that perhaps one such characteristic was lessened very slightly in intensity. At best, for every 99 times that one does something that would be characterized as a manifestation of a trait of the syndrome, one less such action would occur than was previously typical. But in reality a change of 1% probably would not result in any numerical behavioural change.

My wife has been immeasurably helpful in "socialising" me. I am much more adept at fitting in when I am accompanied by her, albeit, I still come off as a bit awkward, but presumably not as much as before I met her.

No, mine has stayed the same. My husband said I got milder after we met but he figured that was because I was depressed and I wasn't used to having him in my life. Then he claimed I got worse again after I got off my pills. He hasn't bugged me in months now about them but he is now saying I should take something for my anxiety. He also helps me out in social situations and also tells me what not to say to people. He also tells me sometimes something I have said implied Y even though he knows I didn't mean that.

In fact mine would have increased if I were with another man because most of them wouldn't be patient and wouldn't accept me.

I did change a little bit last fall but then I burned out and couldn't keep up with the relationship rules. Also my pregnancy has seemed to make me more NT. I am more emotional and can express my feelings better. It also dragged me from my obsession and I don't watch that movie all the time. I just never feel in the mood to see it.

I still say mine stayed the same. It didn't get worse like I thought it would because that is what happened in my last two relationships.