Page 2 of 2 [ 18 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

OuterBoroughGirl
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 2 Oct 2009
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 356

12 Dec 2010, 1:55 pm

I admit to having a FAULTY VOLUME CONTROL SWITCH. WHEN I'M HIGHLY ANXIOUS OR STRESSED, OR I'M TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING I'M EXCITED ABOUT, I MAY INVOLUNTARILY GET VERY LOUD *ahem* Excuse me. :oops:
The funny thing is, I don't recall being told to lower my voice before the age of 18. As a kid, I was often told to speak up, as my voice was more inclined to be quiet to the point of being inaudible. I still become inaudible on occasion when I'm feeling ashamed of myself for some mistake I've made, or I really don't feel like talking, but I'm in a situation where I'm *supposed to* say something. I think I've gotten somewhat better with the voice modulation over time, though I definitely still have issues there.
About a year ago, my boss called me to her office to say that I needed to speak more softly, as she could frequently hear me from her office, that I sounded loud to her, and that was with a degree of physical distance.
This was far from the first time in my life I'd had someone confront me on this issue. I'd been confronted by friends and significant others. Once, I was shushed by a couple of people working in a courtroom when I came up to the front to explain that my jury duty schedule conflicted with my classes for school. I was very nervous coming up to the front of the room to ask about this, and when I blurted out the words I'd been rehearsing in my head, two courtroom workers simultaneously shushed me.
Back when I was still with S, in the early days of our relationship, a waitress once approached our table in a restaurant to ask me to keep my voice down, as other customers were complaining.
Another time, I was confronted by a professor when I met with her in her office to discuss some problems I was having in school. This professor was quite prominent in the department, and I was very nervous about my meeting with her. She actually interrupted me midsentence to inform me that I was talking way too loudly for a one on one conversation, and that I seemed to have some problems with self regulation.
I was really embarrassed about all of these, but when my boss actually called a meeting with me to discuss this issue, I started feeling like this volume control issue was something I really needed to work on. After that, I worked on being more conscious of volume, and I think I have improved some. I still definitely slip up at times, though.
I don't know how the majority of NTs (not all) seem so skilled at appropriately modulating their volume to fit the situation (louder when addressing a large group, softer when talking one on one, that sort of thing) I imagine that it's probably instinctive, as I can't imagine that they approach every conversation consciously monitoring how loudly or softly they're speaking. That seems exhausting. I'd love to hear from some of the NTs in this community regarding how they manage volume control. Anyone??


_________________
"And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad./ The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had."


Last edited by OuterBoroughGirl on 12 Dec 2010, 5:29 pm, edited 2 times in total.

JetLag
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Aug 2008
Age: 76
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,762
Location: California

12 Dec 2010, 3:25 pm

I don't speak very much, but when I do, my voice can jump all over the place, from loud to quiet; and I can be asked both to lower the voice and raise it in the same conversation.


_________________
Stung by the splendor of a sudden thought. ~ Robert Browning