08 Apr 2011, 9:39 am
Solvejg wrote:
I have discovered that my speech becomes quite erratic as does my posting style online if i have had a meltdown. It is like i can't let out coherent phrases and my writing and talking is jumbled and all over the place, it is almost as if i am drunk when i read back over it later.
I also notice i become really literal and hurt lots of people. This is awful because i can't control it. It is the worst when i have tried to make it better with alcohol which has resulted in people never talking to me again. Because i am aggressively trying to get my jumbled messages across.
I end up boxing out the world and even the smallest amount of interaction causes extreme anxiety attacks.
Please tell me i am not alone.
I also notice i become really literal and hurt lots of people. This is awful because i can't control it. It is the worst when i have tried to make it better with alcohol which has resulted in people never talking to me again. Because i am aggressively trying to get my jumbled messages across.
I end up boxing out the world and even the smallest amount of interaction causes extreme anxiety attacks.
Please tell me i am not alone.
That's pretty normal during meltdowns and sensory overload.
I am perceived as pedantic sometimes when the overload and anxiety is quite bad, because I am trying very hard to control my speech and make it sound polite, and it sounds like sarcasm to my boss (best friend). It causes horrible misunderstandings which can result in a ful-scale meltdown because he misinterpretes it and gets angry with me. We have both learned to manage this better during the past few months, though.
I also get incoherent and stutter eventually if the conversation keeps going on. I get very anxious too, as the misunderstandings (from both sides) increase. Eventually it turns to fight or flight.
I sometimes go mute during sensory overload. Sensory overload is not necessarily stressful, unless I am expected to interact. It's just extremely unpleasant and tiring. I have learned what to do if I experience sensory overload, so nowadays I can usually manage it calmly and get away before I cause offence.
08 Apr 2011, 9:48 am
