Hi. How are you?

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I am not saying "be rude to customers". You can be polite without being chatty... Or, in any case, that is my opinion. I just don't understand it, personally. I don't generally like for employees to talk to me when I go to stores. I mean...I don't HATE it. I'm apathetic. It does not strike me as rude when they don't say "Hi. How are you?" or something equivalent. It makes no difference to me. I just want to go in, purchase what I want, and leave. I am happy as long as they are prompt (but there is no need to rush, and I am ok with waiting if something needs to be done such as getting change or...whatever. things happen. i'm cool with it.), give me my change, and don't talk loudly on their phones or to other cashiers and completely "forget" that I am there and waiting for the transaction to be complete.

You could work the grill. All you have to do then is say thank you after every request or to acknowledge every request or statement.

My god, that was so weird.

This kind of being apathetic, I know what you mean. When I shop, I indulge myself in my little world, thinking about what to buy, what has happened recently around me. Then, after standing in the queue, usually I don't feel the urge to speak with the cashier. I tend to use more formal types of greetings. I try to be formally polite. Sometimes I manage to have a little chit-chat, when I have the mood and the occasion. It feels good, nevertheless.

I think there is a reciprocity here. Usually, I appreciate when I'm treated well by a cashier, or by the customer support. This is a way people express the other person is more important that the ones passing by on the store aisles, and they can trust the other a little. A reflex that is planted deep in our soul. When we hear a couple of kind words, we immediately feel less strained and more open. Or course, the shop expects you to buy again, so their side is always more articulate in this respect (or it should be). Imagine you are facing an organization (the mall/shop) much bigger, faceless, and seemingly much more powerful than you are by yourself. It's a bit Kafkaesque, but some of us have it in our subconscious.

I was 17 before I realised when someone asked 'how are you?' you're supposed to ask the same question back (although I still sound wooden when I say it). Never really understood the point of it though, seems pretty useless. I try to see it as some sort of 'handshake procedure' like computers use to communicate with printers. Just opening up the channel for further communication .

I don't really see the point either. I can see "How are you?" having some purpose, but greeting people with "Hi"/"Hey"/"Hello"/etc. seems really odd and not very efficient in regards to time...

I find it funny when people say:

"Hi. How are you?"

And the reply is:

"How are you?"

It's like they don't understand that's a question being asked there. And for some reason it's perfectly normal for people to greet in this way, and nobody thinks anything of it!

I don't even answer the upsell offer.

"Hi, welcome to ... Can I interest you in a ...?"

"Can I please get ..."

The restaurant has them ask the question to make people expend effort to say "No thanks", but I don't waste my time of my effort answering their question. It often confuses the person making the offer, but their upsell bothers me, so we're even.

Last edited by matt on 30 May 2011, 1:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It's just how things evolved. There really isn't a way around it. We'll just have to get used to it.

Personally, as much as I dislike answering greetings from strangers, a society where everyone stays silent does seem pretty awkward and gloomy though (*cough*newyork*cough*).