Would you say your parents were lazy in raising you?

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Ambivalence
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04 Sep 2011, 5:29 am

No.


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Christopherwillson
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16 Sep 2011, 10:41 pm

Not really lazy but i would have done it differently :P
i am the kinda person who can improve everything.


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icyfire4w5
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19 Sep 2011, 2:45 am

My parents aren't lazy, but they are guilty of inconsistency. Till now, I can't predict what they'll do next.



Surfman
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19 Sep 2011, 2:49 am

Without an understanding of AS it was very difficult for them to do the right thing.

Between dad reading Bill Cosbys 'Fatherhood', and mum going off to church to praise Jesus, what chance did they/I have?

I blame **the state** for keeping them dumbed down........

The State.......which is the parent to adults like my parents.....is the lazy one......



Last edited by Surfman on 19 Sep 2011, 6:17 am, edited 1 time in total.

ToughDiamond
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19 Sep 2011, 5:03 am

No I don't think they were lazy. They were never complacent about anything, and always worked hard. I was the one who wanted to sit back and loaf about.



CockneyRebel
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19 Sep 2011, 5:13 am

My parents were uneducated in raising me and a little abrasive at times. I didn't feel loved or accepted.


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Mummy_of_Peanut
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19 Sep 2011, 8:19 am

I love my parents dearly and their family means everything to them. But, there are things about my childhood which cause me a bit of distress and make me think I was somewhat neglected - although I was always fed, clothed and generally cared for. This sounds terrible, but when I was about 4yrs, I cracked my skull on our fireplace (after spinning until I got dizzy). I can still remember the pool of blood on my mum's hand. After I'd stopped bleeding, my mum put some antiseptic on it and took me to my gran's house, as she was going to work. If the same happened to my daughter, I would take her to hospital. I have a dent where I bumped my head (concealed by my hair), but I don't know for sure if this was the cause. I was also sent to school feeling really unwell and was only kept off once it became apparent that I had chickenpox. There are a few other health related incidents which I can think of. Also, I was bullied horribly at high school. I remember telling my mum about it on only one occasion, I bottled it up the rest of the time. But, she never did anything about it. Finally, my bipolar aunt spent a lot of time in hospital when I was a child. My parents would visit regularly and the hospital wasn't nearby. They should have just said, 'Wait a minute, we have a child, she needs us,' and kept visits to a minimum. It's definitely what I would do. They weren't lazy, just made the wrong choices.



Last edited by Mummy_of_Peanut on 19 Sep 2011, 1:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.

lunaloo
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19 Sep 2011, 10:30 am

No, they weren't lazy, they just didn't know quite what to do with me. They thought that my social inadequacies could be 'fixed' if they simply yelled, punished, and berated me enough. They either seemed to think I WANTED to be an outcast and loner or that I was stuck-up and thought I was better than everyone else. On the contrary, I thought everyone else was better than me - I never felt like I measured up.

I remember one time my Dad suggested that I see a psychiatrist. I was horrified because I thought that meant I was mentally ill. Nothing ever came of it though and I suspect it was because my mother could not and would not admit that there was anything wrong with me. She thought I was just being difficult and obstinate and if I'd just listen to her and do what she said, she could 'fix' me. I sometimes wonder how my life would have been different had I gotten some help. Although I don't even know what my diagnoses would have been back then. This was in the late 70s and I don't remember ever hearing much about Asperger's at that time.

My childhood was not happy, though. It was bad enough that I struggled socially, but then I had the additional stress of being constantly berated by my parents for it. I think I was the only teenager to ever get in trouble for not spending enough time on the phone.



Oren
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19 Sep 2011, 10:32 am

No. It revolved around me with therapies and much time and travel devoted to making me as functional as possible.

It was a difficult way for them to live.


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Beabe
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19 Sep 2011, 3:10 pm

no



Tuttle
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19 Sep 2011, 4:47 pm

Nope, not at all. My parents did a lot for me while I was growing up despite me not being diagnosed until I had moved out.



Ettina
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19 Sep 2011, 6:46 pm

Not really. They didn't do a pile of the things that school etc urged them to do, but it wasn't out of laziness - it was because they didn't think it would work. They don't believe in doing 'the same but more' when something isn't working. And they went easy on me a lot mainly because they could tell I was extremely stressed out.