Do or did you parents restricted you becouse of autism

Post Reply New Topic

My parents are closer to the overprotective side of the bell curve, but as long as I'm not doing anything dangerous or illegal I'm practically free to do whatever.

I can't leave the house without telling my parents exactly where I'm going and when I'll return. My younger and older brothers, however, can go wherever they want whenever they want without my parents freaking. They won't let me use the stove or do any housework or get a job. But I'm legally an adult, so why do I listen to them and let them continue to treat me like a kid? I don't know.

My parents weren't too restrictive. I had a bumpy childhood, my mom had an undiagnosed mood disorder and our relationship was in constant flux, she could be abusive at times.

I was tested and found to be gifted as a child, but my developmental delays were explained away by being 3 months premature. I think they missed an ASD and will be seeing a doctor about that soon. I had obvious social deficits. When I was getting bullied in high school my dad was someone I could talk to about it.

I remember that my mom wouldn't let me take gymnastics or dance when I wanted to, because she said I was too clumsy.

But at the same time, my dad helped me overcome some of my difficulties. When I couldn't call people on the phone, he wrote me scripts, complete with smiley faces. When I had a panic attack in the car before my first day of my first job at McDonalds, he talked me into going into the store.

Let's see now, i can't drive, i can't stay out late at night, I can't drink (but that's partially b/c I'm on medication for seizures and b/c of my choice due to religious beliefs), I can't have children (was sterilized at 19, not my choice), When i do take the bus from dad's place, I have to text him, i have to watch how much money i spend, i have to watch what i eat and most recently, my provider most have experience and should not be in my age group (his requirements, not mine. I recently had to fire a provider at the request of my father since he's soo concerned. part of this was my stepmom too. I don't ever remember my dad making decisions as a team with my mother growing up but now that I'm older and wiser, he's sure making a lot of decisions with my stepmom. idk if it's their ignorant behavior from seeing my last provider (who's african american) seeping into this decision to hire someone else (b/c I forgave her for making a mistake on documents but my dad and stepmom don't seem to posess this quality. In fact, I can't remember a time when dad forgave me for something. In fact he almost slipped out an ableist slur over the phone at me once during a fight. Not only that, my dad will casually joke about hispanics and homosexuals. It makes me embarrassed to be related to this guy that he does this much judging of other ppl! Once I tried to forgive him but he wouldn't take it *this was the same day he wouldn't forgive me*)

GAH!! I FEEL FREAKIN TRAPPED AND I DON'T EVEN LIVE IN THE SAME ZIP CODE!!

No. My parents were more the opposite, in a different way. They applied pressure to "work hard" and "be normal", so that led to me having some primitive coping mechanism that worked on a really basic level, but weren't remotely close enough for me to be happy. The whole "work hard" concept made me fiercely independent (probably way more than they expected) and I pretty much moved out when I went to college at 18. I've always taken pride in "choosing my own destiny" and "taking care of myself" even if it's a hard road. Half of the moving out was to relieve the pressure to "act normal" 24/7 in the house, which was always stressful with my ASD. Sorry to hear you were trapped by your parents. Therapists should have made that call, not them.