I don't feel a need for "friends" anymore

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Not just psychologically healthier but also physically healthier. Those who are isolated are at greater risk of heart attacks, stroke, higher blood pressure and other ailments. It makes me kind of wonder if my current lifestyle is setting me up for long-term decline, but it doesn't really seem like there's much I can do about it if I find most people boring and "hanging around people for the sake of it" seems kind of... weird. It feels kind of trapping in a way, knowing that apparently I'm increasing my mortality risk but there seems to be little I can do about it...

Also, most people apparently think I'm a fag (A very recent insight that I've gathered from someone talking over the phone to my cousin), so I don't develop real life friendships too easily. I don't know why exactly, but I'm guessing it might be due to speech patterns and/or tone of voice.

When I was younger I wanted so badly to be popular. Now I don't really care about making friends per se, I just want a place where I feel like I fit in and people accept me. If I make a few friends then that's great, but I'm not gonna put my life on hold for something that may never happen.

- I do want 1-2 friends, the label friend requiring an immensely close relationship including near complete trust in them. I think I can say that the label friend requires platonic love.
- If I don't have 1-2 friends I do feel lonely.
- At the moment I feel lonely because of only having my boyfriend to turn to, I want a second person who I can trust.
- Acquaintances have absolutely no affect on this aspect of me. I really don't see much difference between someone who would talk to me if I was around and someone who would treat me neutrally.
- Despite the interest in friends, I am not interested in what many people view as "socialization"
- What I want from people is trust, them trusting me, the ability to turn to them and the ability for them to turn to me, being comfortable together, and playing (german-style) board games together.
- This is the same as it has always been (except that the times I've had friends I didn't want more)

Thanks to all who responded! I'm eager to hear more insights or opinions!

I'm a junior in college and have no desire for friends. I'm very content with staying at home researching my interests. I do talk to some people in class, and it is fine for me because there is a context to the situation (I have to be there for my education anyway, so I might as well talk to pass time). I often imagine myself talking to someone and telling that person all about myself without worrying about having to listen and respond to his/her life story in return. However, sometimes I crave affection and cuddling from a man. I think that one day I might marry someone very understanding of me. I just am not likely to have friends.

So because I don't have a lot of friends, I'm going to have a risk of heart disease and die of a heart attack sooner? RIDICULOUS!!

while I admit I have many friends, and a few very close ones, I can tell you from experience half the insanity that people willingly go thru in regards to socializing.


One thing that makes maintaining friendships difficult for us is that we're loyal. If you're wondering how that makes it difficult for us...it's because they aren't.

Let's say they get in a fight with their friend and end the friendship or come close to it, and they explain to you their reasons for it( some of which you may semi-agree with); well, then after all that idiocy, everything gets patched up and they're the closest buddies again. You feel really used, and as though you've been put thru pointless nonsense for the sake of drama.

And back when I was growing up, people kept asking me why "I hang around with these losers; I should hang with a better crowd". My response now is "fine, then show me that crowd"; that has yet to happen.

Basically, I'm now the one looking at everyone realizing no one really lives up to my standard, so I only expect so much from everyone else.

I have no problem welcoming people into my life, but I only expect each one to enhance my life in certain areas; in most cases it's more of that they're lucky to have me, too bad they don't register that.

There's a difference between a "lot of friends" and "no friends". "Isolation" was the key word.

I don't really care for them, I am the typical shy person. Why hang out with someone when the next available interpersonal attraction will come a long and your left in the dust more emotionally damaged and more reclused.

I wouldn't consider myself "emotionally damaged" over it by any stretch. More like weary of what to expect, and prepared for that next episode of it, so to speak....

Its a big risk doing that though, you take the risk of risking yourself and becoming a victim to the long list of things. Staying at home seems better, since knowing what can happen. I probably misread what you said but yeah sounds good.

no matter what you do, you risk something.

As one of my heroes, Teddy Roosevelt, once said: "the only person who never makes mistakes is one who never does anything at all".

Life is a gamble; that's reality. It doesn't mean you don't gain experience and knowledge every time you roll the dice.

I don't become a victim because after experiencing these things, I know what to expect, I have set standards for myself, and those around me know where I stand.

If they don't like it, they know where the door is.

I've always been a loner I've never really been a mixer just kept to myself.
I like to do my own thing without anyone telling me what is best for me.

I never really craved friends. At school I tried harder to be friendly, but it wasn't because I wanted friends, it was because I figured that the more people I got on the good side of, the less people would bully me.

i have the same problem.

curious, have you been feeling depressed lately?
if so that could also explain it

you may also want to get yourself checked for schizophrenia

I would be quite happy just to have 1 or 2 friends anything more then 2 is rather pointless.