Do you feel a need to reply to everyone?

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Moog
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22 Oct 2011, 6:13 pm

cyberdad wrote:
I seem to have a good track record for killing threads?


I guess someone didn't feel the need to reply to you :P


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Verdandi
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22 Oct 2011, 7:03 pm

swbluto wrote:
When I create a thread, sometimes I feel a need to reply to everyone because it makes me feel like I'm ignoring everyone else and it feels so rude if I ignore people. Sometimes this makes me pretty hesitant to reply to a single user or a few users because it shows that I'm ignoring everyone else. Since there's a limit to the amount I am physically able to type in a day (RSI issues), I have to balance how much typing I make in responding to people and who I can respond to, but yet, I don't want to limit myself when making a reply.


I reply to most people who respond to my threads. I appreciate their responses and try to keep my end of the conversation up.

I don't feel a pressure to do it, it's something I like doing. I don't really mind if no one responds, though, and it doesn't bother me when I don't get replies in any particular thread unless I asked a specific question and didn't get an answer.



Christopherwillson
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22 Oct 2011, 7:28 pm

i feel the urge myself :P feel exactly how you do.


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CockneyRebel
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22 Oct 2011, 9:47 pm

If somebody makes a thread that I like, I want to reply to it. If somebody makes a thread that I don't like, I do the opposite as a way to avoid hurting that person's feelings.


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cyberdad
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23 Oct 2011, 11:20 pm

Moog wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
I seem to have a good track record for killing threads?


I guess someone didn't feel the need to reply to you :P


Just call me the singing fat lady...



swbluto
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23 Oct 2011, 11:34 pm

cyberdad wrote:
Moog wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
I seem to have a good track record for killing threads?


I guess someone didn't feel the need to reply to you :P


Just call me the singing fat lady...


lol



Mummy_of_Peanut
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24 Oct 2011, 6:37 am

If I start a thread, I often feel this compulsion to reply to each one and I have done this in the past. But, now I usually post something like 'thanks to everyone for your input/suggestions', like Moog.


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ToughDiamond
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24 Oct 2011, 9:32 am

Yes....I seem to have the fixed idea that not replying to anything is rude or rejective. I've been like that as far back as I can remember. As a very young child I remember wondering how anybody ever managed to end a conversation. I think replying was an unwritten family rule......nobody there was comfortable to just hear what somebody said without responding somehow, even if it was just to say "Oh" which I guess was meant as a reassurance that the message had been listened to. They wouldn't even let it go with a silent nod.....almost as if eye contact was not assumed......which makes me wonder if replying is done by NTs less noticeably by body language, and as we don't have that, we simply have to make our replies more definitive and clear-cut, which makes it seem that we need to do it more than NTs?

Dad would correspond with people who shared his special interest, and I remember him being very impressed when he got a reply from a guy who had addressed every main point Dad had previously mentioned. Dad never did feel adequately listened to, and I wonder if anybody with AS is any different? Come to that, how many NTs feel that they get heard enough? If you listen to relationship counsellors and empathy specialists, they seem to believe that people in general don't listen enough.

I don't like the notion of people's ideas just hanging out there unnoticed. If somebody texts me or emails me, I have to think very carefully before I feel able to let it go without replying. In the vast majority of cases, it's the other person who stops replying first. I used to feel slightly offended by that, until I realised that all conversations have to end.



swbluto
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26 Oct 2011, 10:30 pm

Thanks to all who responded! I'm eager to hear more insights or opinions! :D



Moog
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27 Oct 2011, 6:00 am

swbluto wrote:
Thanks to all who responded! I'm eager to hear more insights or opinions! :D


:lol:


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