Aspies don't have a normal life

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i do not subscribe to the ad hoc label "aspie", but i understand that my life is not like average lives.
i do not care at all because i can rest when i need to, and i can do what i like when i please.

i am happy with the way things are.

I struggle with conformity, but I still live the average life. I don't choose to be different, so I just find myself going along with the flow. I'm not complaining either - I feel rather comfortable with it, and it's just become a sort of routine with me. I'm not stating about who I am - I'm stating more what my life is, and what I choose to do daily is not out of the ordinary compared to the average person. So what I was trying to say in this thread (but didn't explain myself clearly as usual) is Aspies can have a normal life.

Well, if it makes you happy, more power to you.

Personally, a normal life is the last thing I want.

I can't ever have a normal life, and it doesn't particularly upset me that I can't either. The main part that upsets me is the impairment in my ability to work and function, although for me this is mostly not due to Asperger's (only in small part AS generated).

Abnormal people are my favourites, the normal ones are the bullies, dummies, herd like, sycophantic, two faced, suck ups that I generally avoid nowadays.

I never was one of them and am glad to be rid of the pretence and pain of trying to fit in

Normal is an artificial construct, a matrix and apple pie america/world proposed in the fifties and modified in time through film and television mainly

its normal to think of Boo as a possible terrorist, for example

I used to think my life was normal........but it's not.

Between the age of 10 and 15 my life wasn't that normal. Nothing to do with my home life - it was moreso my social life. Other kids began to want to be out and about with mates, and going for sleepovers, etc, but I never did any of that stuff. I saw my cousins, but only the ones younger than me because most of the ones my age or older had already gotten to this stage and so I kind of lost touch with them (that's what you get when you're in a family of average NTs). I felt ever so lonely and isolated and I got depression so bad that I had to be taken out of school to see special psychiatrists. This did help, but at the time my mum was so worried about me and I was so worried about myself for not having friends that I was on the verge of committing suicide, which my mum was SO afraid of. I don't blame her - I don't think any normal mother likes to see her children unhappy. I wouldn't either (which is why I'm not going to have children, because I know they will be on the stupid Autism spectrum and so I will have to deal with having unhappy lonely children).

So I guess my life wasn't like the average 10-15 year old back then. I'm glad I climbed out of that rut and left school and found some descent friends who take me under their wing and take me out and about.

They can't so why bother?

What on earth is with people that think everything posted on WP is directed toward them?

Oh, wait. Duh. It's Autism.

Sure, Autism can make you feel as though it's all about you, but you need to overcome that aspect of yours.

My life is not yours. No one's life here is yours, but your own. If you feel your life is normal, so be it.

Who are you to say everyone's life is the same as yours? That's your Autism speaking. It's like you're forgetting that your experience is totally separate and distinct from everyone else's here.

My life is NOT normal. That doesn't mean by extension yours must not be too.

Some aspies can have normal lives.
Some aspies can't have normal lives.
Some aspies don't want a normal life and know which of the former two they fit into.
Some aspies don't want a normal life and don't know whether they could.

I personally fall into the last of these categories.

I don't want a normal life, I want a fun life where I can be myself all the time.

I'm constantly reminded by other people of the ways my life is not "normal." I don't mind my life, except for worries about instability or lack of support in the future. But I don't have a job, find it difficult to organize or manage things. Whenever I do get a job or go to school everything falls apart within months. I live with my family to avoid homelessness. I'm trying to get on the disability pension and receive a pittance of a monthly payment from the state for my disabilities. I can't drive. I don't really cook for myself (and when I do it's always simple stuff). I find it extremely difficult to live independently.

None of this bothers me, only when people suggest there's something wrong with me because I don't have a life similar to theirs. I tried several times to live such a life and it left me worse off. While I am applying for SSI, I hope I can arrange things so I don't need it for the rest of my life - that depends on whether or not I can achieve what I want to achieve. Even if I do, my life will be atypical for a lot of reasons.

This isn't a matter of pride or identity, it's simply how things have worked out.

You're aware this is domestic abuse, yeah? Even if the guy never touches her, it's abusive and it's very wrong. And you may be the person who can speak out and literally save her life, or her sanity.

Okay, here's what I suggest. Do some research on domestic violence help centers in your area. There are most likely places you can call that will let you talk to them anonymously; if not, there's nothing that says you can't just call from one of those pre-paid cell phones and not tell them your name. You want to tell them the situation, and explain what's going on; and ask them what the best way to get her out of that situation is. The reason I suggest calling domestic violence places and not the police is that they will know better than anybody else how the system in your area is likely to work, and how to get this girl out from under your cousin's thumb. I don't know if she's his daughter or wife or girlfriend; but whatever it is, she's being abused. You might not be able to do anything about it; but sometimes you just have to try--stick your neck out a little, tell somebody who knows how to deal with that stuff. At least it'd be on the record, if she got up the guts herself and made a run for it later on and he tried to pretend he didn't have a clue what she was accusing him of.

I grew up in an abusive household... I told people three, four times; and nothing was ever done. I don't want anybody else to have to live like that. So, please--do something.