Would you abort your baby if...

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01 Jan 2012, 3:16 am

More than once i've heard someone telling my parents how sorry they felt for them to have a mentally ret*d son. That was at a time the term Asperger's or HFA was completely unknown. They used to talk about me as if i wasn't there, or deaf, or another kind of being, like a dog.

Those women are a good argument for the introduction of a eugenics.

Todesking
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01 Jan 2012, 3:28 am

PTSmorrow wrote:

More than once i've heard someone telling my parents how sorry they felt for them to have a mentally ret*d son.

My parent's friends always thought I was really bright but shy and awkward. They even made up excuses why I was in special education. They said my being in special education must be because I am so shy I needed to be in a smaller size class. :roll:

They were right about me being not learning disabled tho.

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MakaylaTheAspie
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01 Jan 2012, 3:29 am

What the hell?

Either they want their idea of a perfect life, or they are extremely ignorant.

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League_Girl
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01 Jan 2012, 4:23 am

Sibyl wrote:

I wouldn't abort any baby for any reason -- if it were a sure thing that we'd both die, like an ectopic pregnancy, I would, but even then I'd feel that I'd murdered my child -- sort of "self-defense"

In China, where they only allow one child per family, a lot of parents abort baby girls because if there's only going to be one, they want a boy, who traditionally takes care of his parents, while a girl takes care of her husband's parents. Baby girls who aren't aborted are often killed after birth, or abandoned and wind up in orphanages.

And they are havign a women shortage now so men are having a hard time getting wives and starting a family. I think they ought to outlaw gender abortions. If the baby is healthy, they won't be allowed to abort it. Of course then women would be trying to hurt themselves to get their bodies to miscarry. Abortions have been going on for years and years long before it became legal here. But it was a dangerous thing to do back then.

Rob-N4RPS
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01 Jan 2012, 4:45 am

North Carolina had a 'eugenics' a program for decades, where women, usually welfare mothers, were involuntarily sterilized because some social worker decided that it would be appropriate. Most of these cases were in the Charlotte area.

A life is a life.

Happy New Year!

Rob

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01 Jan 2012, 5:12 am

Rob-N4RPS wrote:

I am not sure if that was right or not. Not everyone stays on welfare. Sometimes people end up in a s**t hole and have to get back on their feet again. I don't think it be fair to those people to be forced to be sterilized for something they are in temporarily.

Do they still have that or is it outlawed?

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01 Jan 2012, 5:36 am

Fern wrote:

I have thought about it a lot, and I don't think that I would personally abort my child, especially if he/she were special needs of any variety. I wouldn't want to rob the world of that tremendous opportunity. All the kids I know on the spectrum are awesome. All I can say is that those women must not know autistic/aspergers people. They are probably just ignorant.

^^^^ this.

The people the OP overheard most likely knew little or nothing about ASDs. It is always infuriating to listen to fu**wits, on any subject.

But being born into a "family" that doesn't want you, for whatever reason, (and I'm not saying having an ASD is anything like a reasonable reason for abortion coz it's not), is no picnic either.

I do however believe in a woman's right to choose. That may be a bit controversial in the US. I'm also not saying women always make good choices as it is not that difficult to avoid unwanted pregnancies in the first place.

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01 Jan 2012, 5:41 am

I would no matter what it was since I don't want kids ever. I don't have sex any more so that should never be an issue anyways.

I do think it's messed up to abort a baby just because it's not "perfect".

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01 Jan 2012, 6:50 am

As someone said before, they must be a bit ignorant. I have an aspie son and an NT daughter, there are strenghts and weaknesses in both types. Just because your child is NT doesn't make him or her perfect, and knowing your child is autistic doesn't mean you know everything you need to know about him or her....there is personality, intelligence, kindness, there is a lot to discover in any type of child and you're always amazed when you get to know them as they grow up, being autistic doesn't change that.... being NT either, by the way.
I was a little bit scared that my daughter might be NT, I pictured a heartless bully , she started lying at 18 months old lol........ but what made her different also made her special, the first time she brought me a decorative flower plate thingy and a pen, and proceeded to feed me imaginary food with that, the pen being a spoon, she was not at all verbal yet, she barely walked, and I thought.......oh god, how SMART is that child?! ! as every parent probably does. I now find her attempts at lying pretty cute (the cat farted is my favourite lol....), and i know it doesn't come from a mean spirit or anything, she's just a normal NT kid who needs to be taught right from wrong (which I never had to do with my son, but I adapted, on the other hand she never had to be taught safe from deadly, I never once had to save her life, when my son at her age was a huge danger to himself, so really there are good things in both cases)

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NaomiDB
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01 Jan 2012, 7:32 am

it's likely my son has aspergers and I love him an awful lot, I don't think I would ever think of him of having some kind of disability
he will always just be him to me.

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01 Jan 2012, 8:15 am

whats so bad about Autism?

Joe90
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01 Jan 2012, 8:39 am

No way!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!
It is normal for parents to want their child to be born ''normal''. I want to have a baby who I can share a bond with, play with, make eye-contact with, watch him/her reach all the milestones healthily, take him/her to preschool, take him/her to the park after preschool with other mums and watch our children play together in the park, put him/her into a local school, when the child gets older invite his/her little friends round.....

I do not want a child who will never have friends, and I especially don't want a child with a mild condition what will allow her to be fully aware of the NT world yet being unable to make friends properly, because that will make the poor child miserable, and which parents want their child to be miserable? Hopefully no parents do.

When a child is diagnosed with a disability, you don't shout, ''horray! My child has a disability!!'' So, that is why I want a neurotypical child. Nobody can convince me into wanting a disabled child.

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01 Jan 2012, 10:13 am

Joe90 wrote:

Everybody goes through life differently, some have it worse than others, NT or not. Just because it turned out one way for you doesn't mean it will turn out the same way for someone else, and don't think every NTs life is just peaches and cream either.

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01 Jan 2012, 10:25 am

League_Girl wrote:

Sibyl wrote:

In China, where they only allow one child per family, a lot of parents abort baby girls because if there's only going to be one, they want a boy, who traditionally takes care of his parents, while a girl takes care of her husband's parents. Baby girls who aren't aborted are often killed after birth, or abandoned and wind up in orphanages.

The Chinese government has tried that, actually, outlawing ultrasound except for good reason, so the parents won't know the gender of the baby, and forbidding ultrasound technicians from _telling_ the gender of the baby. That may just fuel the newborn killings and abandonments. They pretty much have to encourage abortions in general, though, since they have this goal of reducing the population. Which actually makes sense, though I wish it could be done by birth control alone.

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01 Jan 2012, 10:35 am

I don't personally ever want to have a baby because I am terrified in case he/she gets my conditions (not just autistic). Still, if I made a mistake and became pregnant, I wouldn't abort the baby even if I found out it was going to have autism, Tourettes, ADHD, OCD, depression and GAD. I would give birth to the baby then give it up for adoption, regardless of it being 'normal' or not. I wouldn't be able to care for a baby so it would be selfish of me to want one. The only time I agree with abortion is when there is no other option. My aunty was carrying twins and developed life threatening pre-eclamsia and all of her organs were shutting down one by one. She was told that if the babies were born, they would die and so would she. If she had a termination she would survive. Sadly she had to choose the latter. I say sadly though but she has had two beautiful little girls since.

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01 Jan 2012, 10:37 am

Tyazii wrote:

You discovered it would be Neurotypical?

Now they know how it feels.

I was with diagnosed Aspergers a few months ago. A couple of days ago in the supermarket, just by chance, I overheard two women speaking about aspergers:

"If you were preganant with an Asperger, would you abort it?"
"Oh yes, I wouldn't want to blah blah blah,"

Why are Neurotypicals so ignorant and intollerant?
Has anything similar ever happened to you?

i do not believe you.
sorry.

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