S#!T Ignorant People Say To Autistics

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So it has to do with how it's said. I have had to say things in different ways in the past to get people to understand what I am saying. Especially asking a question in a different way so the person can understand what I am asking.

I've heard everything in that video and it's no laughing matter. After hearing those things over again for a while, I had my little war with society. I grew up and got over it, but imagine what would have happened if I didn't hear those things on a regular basis.

If this message seems nasty, I apologize ahead of time. I'm a sensitive person and my goal is not to hurt or offend others.

I never heard those things. Those sound like things you would hear if you were a privileged, normal-looking girl who tells people she's autistic (for some reason).

Generally if someone had a problem with me they were too scared to say anything.

Fraac, I found your response interesting. It is true that most of the comments in this video relate to those with 'pass-ability privilege' (for lack of a better term). I have found it similar to a lot of discussions dealing with physical disabilities and the difference between visible and invisible disabilities.

The ability to "pass" for "normal" is a form of privilege. I don't get stared at and I can fake social skills better and therefore people react to me more normally which makes it easier to socialize with them. However, the assumption is that because I don't seem autistic/aspie socially, that all of my other skills match up. I have a lot more trouble dealing with disability services at school and professors because they assume I'm competent and don't need accommodations. Also, since I can pass more easily socially when I get close to a meltdown or something I'm judged harshly for my actions. If I leave the room to have a meltdown/prevent one without the proper social script first, I'm viewed as rude.

For those of us who have the privilege to pass, we have to tell people sometimes. They don't automatically realize and give us the space and flexibility that we need. Instead, we have to constantly remind people of things we can't do and sensory issues.

Fraac, do you have a suggestion of things for a different version of the video which was more inclusive of a range of people on the spectrum?

I have nerve damage in my legs and use a wheelchair a lot, so I get this type of stuff a lot too!

It can get really annoying. Random people come up to me asking if I need help and don't take no for an answer is really bad because I really suck at making small talk and eye contact. They seem to think I just don't want to accept help, They don't believe that I actually don't need it. I usually just ignore them and speeding up to get away from them.

All the extra attention I usually get is the only really bad part of using my chair. I prefer it when people pretend to not notice me
My biggest pet peve is people who insist on holding the door open or letting me infront of them in line.

The worst is when someone who has traits similiar to AS - some of they which they admit to, and some of which can be seen by others - denies the possibility of having Asperger's probably because they think they're 'too intelligent' or educated to have it.

And my sister both denying I have it because she thinks I'm mentally ill, and not getting my nephew diagnosed PROPERLY, although other people suggested it to her.

I was grateful for the captions/subtitles.... excellent video highlighting ignorance and just plain stupidity. I wish I could talk properly and stop swearing from time to time lol, my own vid's just might come out better.

I bet most people I know don't think autistics are as clever/normal/pretty as that girl, and that's bad.

You're in luck, I like to treat everyone the same. Then of course I am probably seen as ignorant and self centered but the ironic thing is they are the ones ignorant. I have learned that never assume people in wheelchairs always need help. You can ask and if they say no, listen. We even had a class about that at my old job too about helping people in wheelchairs. it said to not assume they need help and it showed a woman in a wheelchair getting aggressive with hotel attendant when he tried to push her wheelchair. But lot of people just don't know this.

I see, aspiefeminist. Maybe it's more a girl thing, the desire to pass. If I have to leave the room due to overstimulation I either just walk off or say "I'm overstimulated so I'm going off for a bit." They don't know I'm autistic and I don't care what they think.

And the odd things I hear are more like conversations that make no sense to either of us. Like a while ago I walked past a guy at night and he said "Don't worry, I'm not going to mug you." I said "I know." Then he looked confused so I asked if he needed help with anything. He said no and we parted ways, both quite baffled. Three quarters of my interactions with people are like this, not including routine stuff in shops and such.

It's cool if autistic girls who need to be 'out' to do the girl social stuff are being better represented in popular youtube videos. My experience would be more about using the same words to speak a completely different language.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MIyhCAPti9w[/youtube]

I love this one!

Sometimes a person can't even get "I'm overstimulated so I'm going off for a bit," and even if they do, when you come back you might get backlash for it. It's good that you don't care what others think... I don't care what they think either, but I DO care when I'm being told off or yelled at for something I can't control and have either already explained or apologized for. I don't think it's a girl thing because I've known males with the same issues, however, I do think it's harder for females on the spectrum sometimes because so many people still think it's a male specific thing unless you're severely autistic.

+10000

I got yelled at by a guy in a wheelchair once for holding open a door for him. I got really upset and told him off, and said I hold doors open for everyone (I do) because its polite and he could shove off if he had a problem with a little kindness in the world. I felt really bad about it later, but I'm not sure that I was wrong about holding the door open.

Honestly, it is just efficient, and works better, if the first person in a group of people who wish to go through an auto closing door, whether they are a formal group or group of happenstance, that first person holds the door open for the group. Energy expenditure, time of ingress/egress, potential for mishaps, it’s just better all around, I don't understand why someone would get upset about it.

well, there'll always be ignorant people

yes there will be thats the understatement of the century-I always have it where I describe what goes on with me as far as my Aspergers and they say "well I get that way too sometimes" and I tell them "with me its not sometimes its all the time 24 hours a day 7 days a week I am feeling these things not just once in a while and feeling anxious,depressed,lonely,etc etc all at the same time-it never stops"