Things You Took Literally as a Child

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Oh, I just thought of another time, when I was in elementary school, that a boy on the bus was making fun of my last name (it's very difficult to pronounce, and there are several funny mispronunciations of it), and continued even though I asked him to stop. So, I marched up to the bus driver and asked if it would be ok if I punched him in the face. She said "not on my time."

I took this as permission. I wouldn't be punching him 'on her time', it would be my time, and perhaps the boy's, that would be spent due to the punching event. I went back and hit him in the face, and was thrown off the bus for a week.

Once, when I was about 8, we were having dinner at the home of a relative who was more well-off than we were and they were serving filet mignon. I asked my mother what filet mignon was and she said, "it's rich people meat." She meant it was something fancy that rich people serve, but I thought she meant we were going to be actually eating rich people.

i don't know if that's normal or not but i remember as a kid it took me some time to understand that the present day would never be called "tomorrow" i don't know if that makes sense

My mom called me a dope one time. My response:

"Yes mommy, I am a dope." xD

I remember a few things from when I was a kid.

My mother made 'veal birds' for dinner one night, which was actually rolled stuffed veal. I thought it was actually birds from out side on the telephone wire. I had a vivid image of birds sitting on a wire and how did my mother catch them? I refused to eat it and I was extremely upset because my mother kept insisting that I try some. She just thought I was being disagreeable and stubborn.

Same deal for 'monkey bread', I thought it came from monkeys. Ugh how horrible who would want to eat monkey bread?

Then there was the time my friend's mom was exasperated with me over something and said she 'could crown me'. And I thought wow is she going to give me a crown? Is this a good thing? I thought about it later and did manage to sort it out, as in, she seemed upset, I don't think she was going to give me a tiara....

And yeah, I had to learn that when someone asks you how are you doing, all you are supposed to answer is, 'fine how are you?'

I am still always having a conversation in my head of, 'they said this but it really means that according to them'....I still have great trouble avoiding foot in mouth, and not blurting what I think is obvious to everyone.

I can not even begin to list the many times I have said something because I thought it was spot on and later realized, I really insulted that person.

On the other hand, I have had friends thank me for telling them some truth that no one else in their right minds (NT socially speaking) would tell them.

Shrugs shoulders....

I ask my husband now "which couple?"

I took the whole "don't drink and drive" thing very seriously as a kid. One time I totally freaked out because my mom was drinking a can of Coke while driving.

I actually had issues with sarcasm. I approached my mother and explained that my stepfather kept saying what I perceive as the opposite of what he means, and I'm unsure what he really wants. My mother then say me down and explained sarcasm. I probably was around 6 or 7.