So I told my parents...

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My mom was actually the one to suggest I might have AS. My twelve year old brother was diagnosed a few years ago and I had told my mom that I often identified with him. She went on to tell me that she often thought I might be but she wasn't sure how to tell me.

Just got my diagnosis yesterday. Confirmed. I already pretty much knew it would be but I kind of just wanted somebody who didn't know me personally to give their thoughts. I am happy to have this information now. When I told my mom, she was really great about it. She asked if I could tell my little brother because she thought it might be helpful to him to hear he wasn't alone. He said it was "awesome."

Well I told them quite a long time ago and I would say, on the whole, they have dropped me. I think they would be outraged to hear that, but there is such a thing as "constructive dismissal" where you can't outright fire someone, so you just find ways to make their work unmanageable.

However I agree with the poster who said "give them time". For myself, I will put off finding a new family-of-origin......

If there's one word that drives me crazy, it's the word, "overcome". I hate that word with a passion. I don't have a disease. I don't need to overcome my autism.

I tried to tell my mom that I suspected I have AS, but I don't think it came out clearly--it was one of those instances where half of what I wanted to say just wouldn't come out. She kind of dismissed it; she probably thought I was just being a hypochondriac or something. (Incidentally, my mom has told me in the past that some people thought I was a little autistic when I was a child.)

When I told my older sister about how I think I have Aspergers, she told me that if I were a child today, I may very well have been diagnosed with an ASD.

Thank you all so much for your responses- it helps me to see things differently.

This is just such a fantastic reply. I don't think I realised just how difficult it would be for them. Thinking about it, it took me a long time to get my head round it, so when it comes to them totally out of the blue, then their response is not surprising, I guess. It is fairly overwhelming and confusing. I said to my brother back in May when I told him that I was worried about their response: how do you tell your parents that you are autistic? Like Frankie_J said,

I think they need time to get their heads round it, and then I know that they will be supportive, loving and caring. They were really supportive when I was in hospital last year, they continue to be supportive now when I have severe depression- both of these though they had experience of. I think that perhaps they just don't know how to respond, they don't know what they can do to help.



I've got my referral for a formal diagnosis now, and so I think that when a qualified specialist says I have AS, then I think it will be easier for them to accept it.
I think that also, yes, I need to give them more information about it so that they can get their heads round it. Maybe it also doesn't help that both of them have significant AS traits, as does a cousin, and as did two grandparents. They have a different idea of what is "normal" perhaps, and so can't see that I have difficulties more significant than their own. Not sure.

I have to say though that, regardless of their response, I do actually feel much better. I've been wanting to tell them and trying to tell them since last April when my GP said I had AS. The whole overwhelming fact of this threw me into depression, and the stress of hiding it and trying to talk about it has just made it worse. Now I've told them, and don't have to hide it, I really do hope that it will improve my mental health...

When i first told my sisters and my mother, they completely denied the possibility that i might have Asperger's. They don't know much about what it is, but even when i tried to explain it was as if i was talking to a wall. They all remember me being strange, and my sisters would sometimes ask me questions to figure me out, so i thought that they would be interested to finally hear me talk about myself for once. It was really upsetting to find out that i was once again left all alone with all my emotions and thoughts stuck within me. My mother recalls trying to hug me at a very young age and i would squirm and run away from her. Actually, i didn't allow anyone to hug me or kiss me, EVER. My voice is normal now, but it used to be pretty monotone and my mannerisms were strange. My oldest sister would make fun of me and mock me and she would often call me a robot and accuse me of not having any feelings. My sisters thought I was a weirdo but they still loved me, but they would often wonder why i was the way that i was and a few times throughout my life they asked me if i had been molested. I have never been molested, but i know that they would prefer to believe that in an instant over me telling them that i might have Asperger's.