Does your family say things like this?

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My mum always says that i should make friends and go out more often however i like to know them first before developing a friendship with them.

my family doesnt know i'm an aspie, and my father told me while i was still living at home, "You'll get in touch with the girls from school, you'll go here and there and do this and that. we'll attack IT from all directions."
attack what? my lack of friends. but i wanted to be alone because i wasnt and still am not comfortable around people. and who are "we"? i didnt want any of those social outings, he did, and never asked me what i wanted.
when i was about six and the teachers in school told my mother, who's a teacher in my school, that at breaktimes i dont socialize and pace back and forth in the backyard or walk back and forth on a tube above a hole in the ground in the schoolyard, my mother got angry at me like i did something wrong.
you cant overcome it. you cant control how you feel. if you feel miserable when you socialize why bother? i was ordered to make friends, and that made me retreat into my shell even more.

I get really upset when my routine is messed with, or when I've planned something in my head (even as simple as taking a cup from my room to the kitchen or going to the mall) if someone decides to add an extra step by asking me to then go into the living room to get a cup from them so they don't have to get up or having to drive to another location instead of straight to the mall which I'd mapped in my head. My Mum says "That's life, you need to get used to it." She's said that my whole life, and still says it now that I've had my diagnosis. She's got a bunch of anxiety disorders, we both hate the phone, but I think she fears it and gets more anxious than me (I just don't like it because I don't know when it's my turn and I can't hear/ understand them right) so I tell her that when she tells me it's life and I need to get used to it after she's disrupted my mapping system, it's like asking her to make 20 phone calls and then saying the same to her. When it comes to being social, my family mentions it from time to time but they don't FORCE me.. We're all a little anti social anyway- Most of my family are super social within our own family, but outsiders... We just don't know how to approach it.

Sometimes that helps NT's understand, bringing one of their problems to light and pointing out how "easy it should be to get over" but they haven't. Sometimes it doesn't. Either way I'm sorry your family says those things.

This isn't even an aspie problem. A lot of extroverts feel there is something wrong with introverts. It is looked down upon as if it were a problem.
One observation I have noticed is that forced socialization is bad for anyone at any age. Introversion is not bad.

I live alone (I wouldn't have it any other way--living with people is far too demanding), I talk on the phone once a week with a few people I am close with--that's usually about it. Okay, maybe once a week I will see someone in person (outside of work). I also do the necessary co-worker interaction with people at work. I don't feel lonely and I am comfortable with my level of socialization. I am often bad in social situations and often don't seem to "get it" and people are frustrated with me. I am probably more aspie than schizoid although I fit the criteria for both. I was an obvious aspie as a kid.

I wouldn't mind a relationship, if it involved no more than several hours a week (but not too close). Apparently, my need for emotional intimacy is extremely low. I like internet forums because I can communicate on my own terms and have the freedom to log off anytime.

There should be no shame in being introverted and needing very low levels of socialization.
Anyway discussing social situations is fun--doing it not as much.

Well, my family certainl has said worse things to me, so do not feel too bad!

"How will you ever survive on your own?" Yeah, that was a REAL help there Mom!

Sincerely,
Matthew