Why do NT's not want to hear about our interests?

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zeldapsychology
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26 May 2012, 10:26 pm

bumble wrote:
zeldapsychology wrote:
Thanks. :-) On the 5 year old aggression thing the class video and research I found online is basically referring to children by age 5 find another outlet besides hitting/kicking to get what they want and aggression is "developed" by that age. Now obviously people have aggression beyond age 5 so perhaps there then there's a psychological issue at work but all the data is backed up. :-)


And interpreted by someone...and prone to human error.

Actually your family are right and most psychological and even sociological research is theory...very little is fact!! ! Although they do so love to pass it off as such.

Not much use to primitive man trying to survive predators if aggression wears off by age 5...what did they do, send the toddlers in to fight for their survival? We are not so different from our palaeolithic ancestors genetically.

The study may not be inaccurate, but I would err on the side of caution and not believe every study that comes along. The studies used to say that the cholesterol in eggs affected the cholesterol in our blood...oopps apparently they don't. Oh dear the study got it wrong. Someone made a correlation that was incorrect and passed it off as cause and effect. Hmmmm happens a lot that.

Oh you can eat as many eggs as you want now...there isn't a limit as they have virtually no effect on your blood cholesterol. Chow down! A great source of Vitman D for those who don't like too much sun....Pale people who sunburn like me!

Just err on the side of caution is all I'm saying, not everything you see or read is right/correct/accurate...shockingly even studies can be wrong! Yes they can.

Psychology used to be my first academic love until I realised that much of it was a crock of ****. I disagree with much of it. No offence meant towards your personal interest. I just loathe much of the present day thinking and don't appreciate some shrink telling me what is and isn't normal based on some cultural expectation of what a human being should be rather than what nature intended. Shrinks irk me.


Hey. :-) I agree I've heard of the egg issue good/bad for you. I understand that research is debatable look at the OMG! videogames cause violence back/forth data on that. I agree they probably didn't send toddlers to kill animals and not all data is 100% but without information and research and the aspect of finding research there would be nothing to "teach" what would we learn in school. My Criminal Justice text mention that of course not everything is accurate. Which I agree.

I disagree on that side of Psychology as well but the research seems interesting. I plan to perhaps do research someday and the fact that it takes so much time to put it together to find out information just to turn around and have someone debunk you tomorrow sounds like a fun game of "Who can post there research first!" :-) If research is so "wrong" as some people say then lets all go do drugs and drink/smoke and eat Mcdonald's since the "research" says Mcdonald's is bad for you as are drugs/smoking/drinking lets forget the years of "data!" and "research!" and go destroy are bodies. :-)



2wheels4ever
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26 May 2012, 10:38 pm

Many of my personal interests hardly make for 'water cooler talk'. In my last 'job' I worked for another aspie and still pay him a visit now and then. Some aspects of our common interest are more detailed to him than me. While he may go by a 'part number xx0500'and all its cross applications I can tell by the shape of the part what it will fit, at the same time when I play my recorded music for him I've spent 3 days making a 3-minute song while he records his piano with an old cassette recorder.

Interests are more interesting than "who's going to win the Superbowl?"



Blownmind
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26 May 2012, 11:55 pm

The reason I don't like my brother-in-laws interests is because he talks about them like he is the leading world expert, and he often says extreme things that does not seem logical at all. He also has a strong tendency to lie, so when he goes on and on about his special interests that I know nothing about, I don't know if he is lying or not. I can't argue with him when I am clueless about that niche, and I can't know if it is true, so I avoid retaining any information he gives me since it could be false information and I don't want to pollute my mind.

This is a special case, but it goes to show there could be many reasons why NT's dont want to hear about our interests.


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Warsie
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27 May 2012, 1:02 am

It wears down their 'battery' for paying attention to things and eventually it exhausts and they cant takeit anymore.


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one-A-N
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27 May 2012, 3:09 am

zeldapsychology wrote:
I learn some facts or about some research for instance in my Criminology class we watched a video and I learned that aggression ends after age 5 most of the time. .... I've researched things in the past and my family don't care to hear about research and data.


Well, I find criminology research interesting.

My research suggests that the most dangerous person you can meet is a 19 year old male. The court statistics peak at that age for criminal offences in both sexes, but males outnumber females overall by something like 7 to 1, if memory serves me correctly.

Anyway, I am not sure what you mean by the statement "aggression ends after age 5 most of the time". What do you mean by "aggression" (do you mean acts of physical aggression, acts of verbal aggression, aggressive thoughts)? Are you saying that adults are less aggressive than children (hmm, why do wars occur among adults then, or murder or sexual violence?) or are you saying that adults handle or express aggression differently than small children?

Also, if you talk theoretical knowledge to someone who has more practical experience than you in the same field, they may resent your apparent expertise. In other words if your sister has a child and you don't (I am guessing here), then she may resent you telling her theoretical information about child behaviour.

All that said, I enjoy your interest in psychology, sociology and criminology. Psychology is one of my special interests too - especially abnormal psychology.



zeldapsychology
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27 May 2012, 7:39 am

one-A-N wrote:
zeldapsychology wrote:
I learn some facts or about some research for instance in my Criminology class we watched a video and I learned that aggression ends after age 5 most of the time. .... I've researched things in the past and my family don't care to hear about research and data.


Well, I find criminology research interesting.

My research suggests that the most dangerous person you can meet is a 19 year old male. The court statistics peak at that age for criminal offences in both sexes, but males outnumber females overall by something like 7 to 1, if memory serves me correctly.

Anyway, I am not sure what you mean by the statement "aggression ends after age 5 most of the time". What do you mean by "aggression" (do you mean acts of physical aggression, acts of verbal aggression, aggressive thoughts)? Are you saying that adults are less aggressive than children (hmm, why do wars occur among adults then, or murder or sexual violence?) or are you saying that adults handle or express aggression differently than small children?

Also, if you talk theoretical knowledge to someone who has more practical experience than you in the same field, they may resent your apparent expertise. In other words if your sister has a child and you don't (I am guessing here), then she may resent you telling her theoretical information about child behaviour.

All that said, I enjoy your interest in psychology, sociology and criminology. Psychology is one of my special interests too - especially abnormal psychology.


Cool! Hey! I remember reading all that info. in my Criminology and Criminal Justice courses. :-) What I meant by "aggression" is according to the video and research it has developed by then. As in they have found other outlets other than aggression as in "hitting/kicking" to get what they want. Not that later ages don't have it which might be a psychological issue of some sort but most kids "grow out of it" by age 5. According to the research from the video and Googling it.

Also I agree most people who have kids don't want to hear facts about them such as the spanking or criminal likelyhood about them. Which is why of course mentioning the boys more aggressive overall and more likely to land in jail I'll keep to myself. Erica has a Criminal Justice degree but doesn't go as far as remembering the academic side and facts side of it. She's planning to attend law school so I think she will get an eye opener jumping back into the academic setting. :-)



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27 May 2012, 8:56 am

They do, but only to a limited extent. Nobody wants to hear somebody talking about the same thing all the time. Even I don't.


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27 May 2012, 11:15 am

I feel this strange urge to post a wall of text about my favourite rock band right now. :lol:

Just kidding. :wink:


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27 May 2012, 3:12 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:
The reason is because many of us have special interests that are obscure.

^THIS^

Meerkats were my special intrests YEARS before Meerkat Manor or Compare the Meerkat was ever released. Now that meerkats are "cool" and "mainstream", everybody wants to ask me stupid questions about them becuase they aparently "love" them so much. Okay, if you really did "love" them so much, I think you would already know the obvious. You weren't willing to listen about meerkats before, so what makes you think I'm going to talk to you about them now?


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27 May 2012, 7:50 pm

zeldapsychology wrote:
I learn some facts or about some research for instance in my Criminology class we watched a video and I learned that aggression ends after age 5 most of the time. I mention this to my sister Erica (since her son/my nephew) just turned 5 today. She responded "Not everything you see is true." IT'S FACTUAL RESEARCH!! ! I've researched things in the past and my family don't care to hear about research and data. IMO it's sad. If a child says "I learned how to spell CAT C.A.T. you get praise but up it to College level work and research and my family blows it off or don't seem interested much. I guess because it's not something they can understand. But I just find that sad that they aren't open minded. :-(


Don't tell the simple-minded what you learn that excites you......tell us!! !! :D :D :D :D :D



BuyerBeware
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28 May 2012, 12:49 am

Because it's not what they want to talk about.

See, they can talk about whatever they want to talk about. But only they can do that.

You can only talk to other people about stuff they're interested in. But they can talk about stuff they're interested in, because stuff you're interested in is boring to them.

This is true for the majority of individual human beings on the face of the Earth.

But Aspies are self-centered, disinterested in others as people, and not good listeners. :roll:


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Smartalex
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28 May 2012, 1:03 am

zelda, did you maybe hurt your sister's feelings?



DerStadtschutz
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28 May 2012, 11:39 am

questor wrote:
The reason they aren't interested is because we go on and on about it


I'm gonna call complete and utter BS on that one. EVERYWHERE I GO, people will NOT shut the f**k up about sports... That's ALL they talk about... stupid goddamn football, basketball, and baseball... sports, sports, sports. They sit and argue why one team is better than another, who's going to win what, blah blah f*****g blah... "why's billy upset?" "oh, his team just lost." What the f*****g s**t? They talk non-stop about sports... and like cars, and celebrities.



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28 May 2012, 12:00 pm

Women I know mostly go on about clothes, their weight, food, TV/celebrities, work, money (like bills, etc), and people they know.

Men I know mostly go on about sports, cars, TV/celebrities, work, and people they know. But men mostly try to make a joke out of everything, which really annoys me. They always seem to throw an insult at people they know but in a friendly jokey sort of way, and it drives me mad in the end.

Don't you just hate it when teenagers and people in their 20s imply everything you say with something related to sex? Ohh, so annoying!


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Erminetheawkward
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28 May 2012, 12:09 pm

So... has anyone had any luck at all sharing special interests, or deciding who to share with? It seems I can even bore my closer friends when I start talking about art and music...



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28 May 2012, 12:18 pm

Erminetheawkward wrote:
So... has anyone had any luck at all sharing special interests, or deciding who to share with? It seems I can even bore my closer friends when I start talking about art and music...

Yes, write a blog, and find similar blogs to post comments on, and before you know it, you are part of a small blog "island community".


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