Do I wish for a cure?

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That kinda makes sense, except that life always throws a bunch of random crap at you to deal with, and unless you've got minions/support workers to deal with all the random crap for you, you'd better have some ability to break out of your restricted interests and deal with random crap yourself. Usually each little bit of random crap has its own time limit to boot...

I do hate having AS. There is nothing good that comes from it with me. I don't feel I'm a part of any groups. I don't feel I've turned out the person I wanted to be or was meant to be. I feel I'm not the daughter my parents wanted to have. I get the impression that (although my parents love for who I am anyway) they still would prefer I was confident, had lots of mates, and was happy in myself. That's what all parents want, because what parent wants their child to grow up unhappy? And I have grown up unhappy, and so my parents are unhappy. OK I get good days and bad days, but so do we all. OK, a neurotypical life is not the golden ticket of a life of happiness and peace, but I would just love to be able to think more like other people instead of always overthinking things and overreacting to trivial things that others haven't even thought about. I feel most things I say and feel is just....madness. And my obsessions I have just invite more stress into my life. I can't help being obsessed with a certain bus company (NOT FirstGroup), and I can't help it if the UK is being ran by a bunch of bastards who don't know s**t and is cutting back services we need which might, in time, affect my favourite bus service and the company. I just wish I wasn't this obsessed, but I can't help it. And living in an unstable country doesn't help either, a country where the rich are supported and the average are being pushed out, doesn't help either. That makes almost everybody on average to low income feel insecure, so it definately does with me. And no, I haven't got a high IQ, just because I'm Aspie doesn't mean I'm confident and clever enough to become engaged into a special interest that would set my life up. It doesn't always work like that.

So I would at least like to be better at socialising, making and keeping friends, being socially accepted, being more confident, and having a higher self-esteem and able to hold my head up high instead of getting kicked back further by horrible people out there.
OK, I can't complain really, there are a lot of things I can relate to NTs about. Often when I'm watching TV with people on who are the completely opposite to me (really confident, real conformists, know everything about fashion and trends, excellent examples of NTs), and yet some (or a lot of) things they say I can relate to, I often think ''oh I think/feel that too!'' And that makes me feel that I am not alone in a lot of things I do, say and think. I suppose I should try to focus on the things I can relate to NTs with, rather than the things I can't.

Just yesterday I had a "I am completely broken and want to crawl into a hole where no one can see me ever again" moment when it was discovered I had checks I hadn't cashed or even looked at for 1-2 years crammed in my wallet totaling about $300.

Of course there is no such hole, and if there was it probably wouldn't have anything to eat in it . So... start over (with a new wallet) and keep trying to get it right until Hell freezes. What else is there to do?