Tell me why it doesn't suck to have AS.....

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I totally agree with you Norah about what you said about the employment and workplace situation for Aspies. It has happened to me more times than i care to remember. Actually everytime. In school i aced all my tests and was book smart but people stupid. Then i developed an ulcer from the stress of trying to fit in and not being able too and dropped out. Then i had to work for a living so i worked any job just to get by. It was the same thing at every job i ever had. Also have a problem with being on time and my co-workers would make sure i got in trouble for it if i was a few minutes late. But if one of them was a couple of hours late they would cover for each other.

NorahW,

Have you ever heard the story about the ugly duckling? HEY, I am 43! I practically JUST found out I have AS! It is nice to know I have SOMETHING. Maybe I can be a little more accepting of others, etc... I also now I can't judge ANY of their abilities by mine.

As for negatives? Really, there AREN'T any! GRANTED, some people here have comorbid problems, and some may even have some symptoms I just don't, but they aren't necessarily part of AS.

OK, what about the sensory skewing? Well, the world WOULD be safer if they heeded it. If they REFUSE, that is mostly THEIR problem!

What about the social deal? HEY, that is basically like two different types of robins, each having a different song. OK, SO WHAT!? My mother HERSELF caught herself, as I have caught MANY, making a "gesture" that ANY "body language" book says shows defiance, hatred, dislike, etc.... I was ACCUSED of doing that "gesture" because I was supposedly racist. Well, I did a poll. *******EVERYONE******* told me they did it for the SAME reason! To rest their arms! NOW how good is the NTs precious benefit?

BTW I asked another AS person here a STUPID question. I admit that. I guess I just got used to what some ask. She gave me an answer to the question I asked, NOT the one I implied. She later realized what she did "wrong". But HEY, she answered the question I asked, and nt what I meant. But HEY, sometimes that IS the best way to answer. Frankly, I used to give VERY detailed answers. I stopped that, for the most part, about 10 years ago.

HEY, that MAY sound stupid, but you should here some of the stupid things they say to, or ask me! Sometimes, I wonder why THEY are still employed.

Now, as far as the benefits? The skewing DOES have a good side. As for savant type skills, the savantism CAN shift somewhat voluntarily, and is closer to genius. Hey, that is nothing to sneeze at. According to one resource, Einstein originally didn't do well in English because he figured he didn't need it. I was told German was one of the hardest languages to learn. OK, I learned Danish, and enough German to get an A in German II in College. I never bothered with German I. Yet I am ONLY NOW really studying Spanish, because I had little interest in Highschool when I took it. I'm not even REALLY studying it in the intense way I did earlier with computers or electronics.

Now, as to the slavery like attitude you mentioned. YEP, that happened with me. I quit eventually. I now make a LOT more, and do less usually. BTW A lot of NTs are subject to the SAME sort of stuff ALL THE TIME!

As for being gifted, etc... Apparantly, most AS people are. It also starts early.

You should stop concentrating on negativity. That seems to be all you are doing!

And HEY, I am having a problem starting my business back up, due to time and logistics. But HEY, most people don't do that even though they have far fewer reasons not to.

Steve

It could be a lot worse... I'd rather be ASish than stupid, for example.

I've worked one crap job to the next. Despite having better performance in some areas, I take a very long time to complete some work that others fly through. In most low level jobs, quantity is way more important than quality. They always tell me that I'm slow, the fact I have a 130+ IQ doesn't mean anything to them if I can't get stuff done the way they want. I'm always catching mistakes that another girl I work with does (she just got the promotion I was in line for), but I've long stopped trying correct them. I'm too picky... so I never get done fast... Even if my work is 110% correct, the person with twice as much done at 85% correct will win.

I'm late frequently no matter what method I've tried, so they look down on me for that as well. Sure, anyone who wants to tell me "just don't be late and you'll be fine"... ok, sure tell me that. That really helps alot.

Sure, overspecialized skills are nice, but if you are lacking in some of the basic skills that most people take for granted... well, unless you find your "perfect niche job".... it's just not going to be easy. No one wants to understand if you try to tell them you lack these skills that are considered SO rudimentary. I've tried to explain and I might as well be telling them I aquired these deficencies when I was abducted by aliens. Not having these skills amounts to "lack of trying/laziness" to almost everyone I run into. Granted, you would think people would give you a break if you can prove to them your are AS in some way. If they don't understand what it is, it's not going to help. You could give a detailed description of AS to a NT person, are they really going to read the entire thing and understand it as well as the AS person that just gave it to them? Most likely they will glance over it and say "Oh wow, I probably have this too!"...

The worst part for me is when they start to pity me. They won't accept me for normal, won't fire me and give me a smaller workload... That really does alot for my confidence as being "smarter"...

I really doubt most Aspies consider themselves as having "superior intelligence" even if they are better at some things. Sure, if someone competes with me at one of my niche abilities, I will bowl them over and destroy them so fast, their head will spin... How often does that situation happen? Not nearly enough... :/ When I do do it, everyone will be in awe. Why? Not because of what I actually did, it's because the "Slow" guy was able to do it... Looking like a "rainman" type, isn't such a hot look... I'm not gonna get any dates that way.

I can't say it's good or bad. Perhaps, it's a trial of life just like everyone has to deal with. I don't want to talk negatively about AS. I just want to relate that the workplace is a difficult place and those who are still in school should try as hard as they possibly can and secure a good degree. Get the best job you possibly can. Once you are stuck in a job, it gets even harder.

I think those who express an exclusively positive view of AS are doing the community a disservice by alienating those who don't feel AS is a godsend. Plus it inflates some peoples' egos to ridiculous extremes, giving them the belief that they can do whatever they want because they're oh-so-superior, always logical, perfect, unlike NTs.

Acknowledging your difficulties is part of growing up. If you can see the negatives in your situation, then don't ignore them, do something about them. At least you're one step ahead of those people who pretend they don't have problems.

We're just trying to be positive instead of indulging in self-pity.

If you can not accept who you are now you probably won't be able to accept who you are in the future. I believe that alot can be over come by hard work. I was diagnoised at a young age and had social therapy since I was 5 so I'm fairly good in a social situation, better then some of the AS kids at my school anyway. I believe this is because I tried my hardest and worked to acheive where I am today. You see, I believe that if you continually let what stands in your way blind you while trying to fix things, the problem will be very difficult to over come. I'm not going to lie to you, with AS comes great difficulties but if you think of yourself as just an Aspie and not as just a person in the big picture, it'll be harder to fix things. But of course, that's only my opinion.

I'm thirty four, recently self diagnosed.

You want a concrete example of how negative AS trait can be benefitial? Everyone keeps mentioning social, so that is the one I will use. Specifically, lack of empathy.

Now, contrary to your statement, many jobs and employers are looking actively, even desparately for people with low social needs, and its not to exploit them. Certain mindsets and perceptions are highly valued in certain fields(One I mention isnt very well paid, but... what the heck)

I lack a sense of empathy. If someones upset, angry, hurt(not injured).. I probably will not notice, and if I do, I will not really reflect that. I dont get upset by empathy, even if I do feel for someone.

First job, and the lower paid one(s) are security, both on sites like malls after dark, or nightclubs. I'm not particularly brave, but if someone is angry, or pulls a knife or bat on me, I tend not to get visibly upset. My lack of empathy keeps me calm. Thats the low paid one.

how about high pay for low empathy, without exploitation? You want examples? Paramedic. Forestry Ranger. Police. Military. Veternarian. All you have to be able to do in these jobs is talk politely(and not always). Silver/Gold smith, Engineer, Pilot, Electrician, plumber...

Moderate/low pay? Telemarketer, bill collector, (medical) transcriptionist, Assembly line worker, truck driver, bus driver, train engineer, forklift(and other equipment operator), and many others, such as postal worker.

A civil engineer is a good example, and related to what I do now. It runs from fixing sewers all the way to arranging meetings to plan city streets. You rise to the level of your comfort and stay there. HUGE demand for people in essential service like water treatment, power services, gas... and nobody expects you to be a motivational speaker!

Its not a matter of employers looking for people people(thats so strange to say), its a matter of you being negative, and not being aware of the vast variety of jobs out there. This is coming from a guy thats had 30 jobs in the last 16 years. Me.

If that doesnt float your boat, get a job flipping burgers(or whatever), save up 100 bucks, and buy a candy machine. Ask your employer if you can place it at work. Employers LOVE when people have an extra reason not to quit. In their eyes, you are more likely to stay, so as to retain that location for your machine. They see it as leverage.

You buy a gum ball for 5 cents(1 buck for 5 000) and load your machine, selling them each for 25 cents. Thats 400% profit. 105 dollars to set up. 25 cents goes into that 420 times. 420 gum balls gets all your money back. Less than 10% of that first bag.

How long to sell 420 gumballs(The big kind)? The small ones where you get several works out the same(its the same amount of gum). At 5 gumballs per day(1.00 profit, after cost) its 100 days. Three months and 7 days. If you dont sell any? you are out 105 dollars. thats it. 6 per day is 84 days, or 2 months, 24 days. 7 is 70 days. and so on.

If you buy a sticker machine, profits are higher(but smaller market), but you should recoup faster.

These things dont need a lot of empathy. A lack of empathy will help you deal with the owners of the location too. They make you money while you are off sick at home, melting down, sleeping, working another job..

What I dont recomend is dropping several thousand on an existing business. People generally only sell them because there is something wrong. Better to learn and grow your own.

I did this for a living, by the way. For four years, longer than anyone has ever employed me, It kept me fed. at times I worked day jobs at the same time.

Most of the difficulties the topic creator listed are only caused by other people, not actual AS. If more people understood it better, it would be better for the AS people.

I agree.

A large different between Asian education and American education is what we perceive as "smart". In America, most people will say that a smart person is naturally smart. In Asia however, the smartest person is the person who works the hardest. Is it any wonder why people from Asia score higher on all tests compared to Americans?

They learned that by working very hard you are able to gain the experience to be smarter as opposed to just relying on natural abbilities. Many people over there follow the teachings of Suzuki which states that while intelligence is a mix of both the natural and the nurtured, the nurtured part of a person matters more than the natural ability. The logic behind this is, what is the point of having natural talent if you have no clue how to use or refine it?

You're probably asking how does this tie in to the thread by now. Suzuki said that everyone is able to reach their full potential no matter what. All you have to do is get out of your slump and get to work on something. That something can be anything, but you can't learn to overcome any disadvantages unless you encounter them face to face every day and have the will power to defeat those problems.

I'm an Engineer, Music Therapist, Professional Trumpet Player, Music Educator, a mentor, computer whiz, composer, and an all around jack of all trades. On top of which I am on the dating scene and I have become much better with socializing with people than I have in the past. Please trust me when I say I had no social skills as a child. Took me forever to learn them and the whole social thing didn't click until 8th grade for me. I let nothing stop me and I live life on my own terms (as should everyone).

If AS provides at least one good thing for everyone, it is willpower and strong values and I think some people forget that those qualities go quite a long way.

So far, my "savant" skills have been pretty useless in the place of self-discipline, a painfully developed skill for the likes of me.

Yes, it does. These are your challenges to success.

Then become your own kind of people person. Develop whatever charm you might have as fully as possible. Otherwise, you're screwed.

Yes, some people are fortunate enough to have facility in both areas. The rest of us have to work to develop ourselves in some ways.

Then don't. Just deal with it on your own, in your own way. If you have the balls.

I don't see anything NTs have that a determined aspie can't gain.

Learn the arts of war. Master them. Make them your own. NTs get used to depending upon their gut reactions, and they can merely hold their own. An artist can conquer. However, artists who never come into their flower are defenseless. As an aspie, you've got two choices: sky high or f****d. There's no middle ground. It was never intended for you, and, really, the mediocrity would only cause you to whither and die.

Last edited by Griff on 26 Nov 2006, 6:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

Well done guys, we have successfully overpowered him and boosted our own self-esteems in the process

Nyet, nyet, we named positive traits.

Everyone does? I don't. But as several polls here and elsewhere have determined, even with the most definite downside most firmly prefer their AS to a cure which would remove what is seen as Aspie uniqueness, personality, ability.

As far as work goes I found a niche that suited my aspieness very well for many years.
Analytic, observational, defined steps and objectives, social interaction limnited bounds, and my own room where I was the boss.

I'm about to see if I can do something different, but I can always retire to the familiar if necessary.

Sorry if I sound like a "gifted " Aspie, but I've just learned to use the mind I've got to best advantage. I'd be terrible in a noisy environment and in many social jobs, which appeal not anyway, whether I'd be wonderful at them or not. I couldn't be a racing driver or a pilot, or most sorts of salesman. But I've only ever failed one job interview for a job I actually wanted.

Glad to be aspie like glad to be gay? Very nearly. Most of my hassles come from a world that doesn't understand and has its own fixed viewpoints. But I've got most of work fairly well trained now.

Most NT`s have maybe these ability, but most of them are way into the group to do this things, I mean they do it if the given group, chef, or society demands it not of their indiviual thinking...