Do you have difficulty making decisions, big or small?

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If i know what i already like, i will immediately decide on that. If i am surrounded with choices there are some questions with, i have a very hard time deciding, especially if i am pressured to do so.

I have the same difficulties. I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to make a decision and then, after making it, I start questioning it. At a restaurant, I sometimes order the same dish as one of the people who is with me, just to avoid going through the decision process.

_________________
Probably 75% Aspie, 25% NT... and 100% ADHD

Aspie-quiz results:
Aspie score: 138 of 200 / NT score: 78 of 200 => Very likely an Aspie.

Yes, I like to consider all my options in great detail. However, sometimes I just get very frustrated. For instance, I tend to make impulsive buys in stores (which I avoid at all reasonable costs) because I can't stand being in them.

Simple answer, yes.

yes I do.

I hate very large decisions or very tiny ones (like choosing a flavor or CD to play). Medium, work-type things generally are ok. But I really, really put off my procrastination of the BIG ones like having a MAJOR clean-up of this house or making an investment. I have come to realize this trait along with inertia are my biggest issues right now, aside from social/relationship & intimacy concerns. They still point out I do have continuing challenges still.
However, I must decide what to do about all three. Which is a major choice, that I have yet to make.. ARRRGGGGGGGJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Sincerely,
Matthew

There always seems to be a sense of dread about making the wrong choice (that I will regret later) and this drives me to do a forensic job on the options. Hours go by because you simply can't rush forensics. How frustrating then, when the final choice inevitably turns out to be the wrong one due to over-analysis... an experience that feeds-back into the next round of indecision. I wish I could work out why the big decisions are so much easier though... because I find that to be the case as well.

I'm pretty good at making decisions now, but it's something that improved over time. I don't find it easy and I usually spend more time on it than other people I know, but I do it and do it well.

For big decisions I think taking the time is justified. For small decisions I try to "meta-opitmize" first by asking "is this decision big enough to be worth optimizing for the best outcome or should I just pick any choice"? Of course, that itself takes a little extra time, but on the whole I find it helps and over time I learn the patterns around which decisions are "big enough", so it becomes easier. For small, but frequent decisions I try to build objective rules for the future. For example, I've often had trouble deciding whether I need to shave this morning or it can wait until the next morning. I now have 2 rules about this:

1) If you're unsure whether to shave then shave.
2) If you spend more than 3 seconds deciding whether you're unsure then you're unsure.

Ditto to pretty much everything said in this thread. I rarely break form when dining out. Its French dip at a burger joint, 2 slices of pepperoni at the pizza joint or my lunch for the last 3 months which is a Sammamish on a French baguette with extra pepperocini (Interestingly I never asked for the extra pepperoncini, they thought I asked every day so started this weird trend. They see me coming and holler out "Sammamish on white with extra pepperocini?" and I just say yes. Its a good thing though I love pepperocini).

As for decision making it can take me weeks to properly respond to a simple text message.

"hey you want to hang out this week?"

"well yes, but... Aieee!"

Ditto to pretty much everything said in this thread. I rarely break form when dining out. Its French dip at a burger joint, 2 slices of pepperoni at the pizza joint or my lunch for the last 3 months which is a Sammamish on a French baguette with extra pepperocini (Interestingly I never asked for the extra pepperoncini, they thought I asked every day so started this weird trend. They see me coming and holler out "Sammamish on white with extra pepperocini?" and I just say yes. Its a good thing though I love pepperocini).

As for decision making it can take me weeks to properly respond to a simple text message.

"hey you want to hang out this week?"

"well yes, but... Aieee!"

I remember one experience:

I was at a Denny's, and I knew I wanted to order the Buffalo wings with ranch dressing. I couldn't commit to that choice, so I spent two hours putting the waiter off until I was absolutely sure that the consequences of ordering said wings would be consistent with my intentions.

Ugh. I can relate to not wanting to make decisions. I was at a restaurant last night and kept delaying as long as possible. As well, if I have a mess to clearn up (like right now), I'll spend hours planning it out and worrying about the course of action instead of CLEANING IT UP!

When making a major purchase, I usually spend weeks if not months pondering it. Of course, I usually make the wrong decision since I missed something obvious because I overanalyzed the situation. Story of my life.

This used to be a big problem with me. One day I noticed it and thought from now on I would just make a decision no matter what and stick with it even if I had second thoughts. It might not be the perfect solution but it did solve my indecisiveness and it has led to a better quality of life.

I can't really say it's a serious problem for me, but often I do take time to decide among things I should do first, etc. Usually it's clear in business matters, once I consider the facts such as importance and what makes sense, but in small or personal choices to be made, sometimes I'll take a long time and waste the opportunity to do any of the choices . Case in point: If I have a Sunday tradition of taking a motorcycle ride (no purpose/no destination), and sometimes I'll just wind up riding around in a 50-mile circle on the highways of the county; not having decided between a mountain ride or along the coast, or to take a run through a complicated canyon, etc. Or sometimes I'll have trouble deciding where to put a new object in the house; furniture, or kitchen item, etc. I go crazy if anything doesn't "belong" somewhere, and if I can't figure out where it should "belong", I can't go forward. I have a storage room full of furniture that I want to use, but can't figure out where it belongs in the house. And of course there is the "what for lunch" decision, which will cripple me and actually become a problem if I can't decide fast. I have a medical condition, which causes me to need to keep meals on time, as well as the Autism need for things to be on time. So that's a double-whammy when I can't figure out what I want. This usually happens when I'm out of the house, and need to pick something from a restaurant or lunch counter. I don't eat junk food, so that pretty much lets out McDonald's and the like. Sometimes I wind up just ordering a plain flame-broiled hamburger with nothing on it, and eating the meat patty out of it just for the needed protein at the moment.

Charles