I don't care about social norms any more.

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I have recently stopped caring about social norms (within the past year), and I feel tremendous relief! I do still try to fit in when I feel I have to, like at a funeral or something, but that's about it. Giving up on trying to fit in has been the best decision of my life.

I'm trying to do this. Fact is, all my efforts to fit in backfired more often than not. I would have been better off relaxing and looking weird than tying myself up in knots and still looking weird. After so many years of trying to be normal, though, it's a pretty deeply ingrained habit and just letting go of those anxieties isn't always a simple matter.

I'm always looking for the happy compromise, if it ever exists. It's not about conforming to societal expectations, but limiting miscommunications with people I do want to connect with.

Yeah its exhausting isn't it? That is why I kinda gave up on it a long time ago......I do however sometimes try and act like I am feeling better than I am because a lot of times people instead of being helpful like to criticize me for 'being negative' Its annoying and even people who I normally get along fine who supposedly 'understand' me say that.

I mean I love the people in my family close to me, but sometimes they get on my nerves.....why is it I am simply not allowed to be negative ever, yet if I was to criticize any of them for being negative when they are being negative they'd just get mad at me for criticizing how they feel. I mean its like if any of them were to inquire about 'why have you been so isolated lately' I feel like I cannot even be honest and say 'I have been feeling pretty down and it seems to irritate you guys when I'm 'negative' so I figured I'd deal with it alone.' Then they would want me to 'not dwell on it.'

it does get frustrating, so I certainly don't have the energy to try and act neurotypical...I honestly don't even know how to do that, in the past I thought I was pretty good at masking my 'weirdness' but I think that was more wishful thinking.

19 years, not even once in my life I cared about the social norms.

"Yay, you're lettin' me be me!"
- Peter Griffin

When I was younger I had phases when I thought something was wrong about me and I should feel ashamed (because I was being bullied). I remember that I wrote lists about how I could get "cooler". But once such a phase was over I'd go back to "f*ck that, I'll do what I want". And now that's my standard motto.

I've learned there are optional social norms and non-optional social norms.