How to be happy as an aspie

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>Focus on your PASSIONS.
>Hang out with unusual/quirky characters.
>Listen to music.
>Write.
>Exercise.
>Drink caffiene.
>Eat chocolate.

Being around too many neurotypicals doesn't help, so I've learnt. Being around other people who have the same difficulties as you does help a bit better, even if they're not other Aspies, people on the Autism spectrum aren't the only ones who are socially awkward on this planet.

Actually, it can be disheartening if all your Aspie friends around you are doing better than you socially, and you only have mild AS and so spend the rest of your life wondering how they manage to lead better social lives than you do (it's currently happening to me right now).

I find the easiest way to be happy with my condition is to stay away from people who would use it against me in some way (the general population), and since most people already do that with everyone else, the only real way to be happy with oneself is to avoid being put down by everyone else. So I stay home (and sometimes it doesn't even work then).

Ok wow!! !! For being a bunch of aspies you all are some very insiteful people and thank you to those who who have responed it is people like you taking time to help me a stranger is heart warming and why I post here and really I do appreaciate it and I wantt to apologize to you anut I forget the rest of the name I just was sadden when I answered and please forgive my rudeness to your response being a smart alec.
Ok I do not know if it is all aspies but what I do know is that it people want nothing to do with me 5 minutes after they say hello. I do not understand why and often will confront the person not in a bad way just i n a direct way to find out what happen and see if there is some hope of repair or explanation to fix it. But sometimes I getfrustrated and may loose my temper a little when they respond with something like no we're cool or no there is nothing wrong when you kneow there is something wrong because they are acting different or maybe not talking to you at all anymore when two days ago it seemed like you where best friends. I had this thing happen to me at the place where I living me and this guy seemed to being getting along great and then I don't know what happened he has severed all commucation with me and just looks in my direction without so much as a hello and a few days ago we where talking and at one point seemed we where on our way to good friends and now he barely looks at me and where he would say hello snd ask how my day was he stares at me without a word and if I ask him what is going on he give me stuff like we are cool or what ar you talking about or throw it on me that I am not saying hito him well yeah but what do you when it seems like they don't want you around. I mean if he was the only one no biggie but this is whatt happens to me with a lot people and it really angers me because it seems they least they can do if they do not want to be your friend tell you why so so you could have something to improve on for the next person. I also try to tell people about my aspies and some of what that means so that they may be more understanding and hopefully not hold me to the same standard as the rest of their friends and maybe stick around longer and be a little more understanding but tring to explain aspies to a non aspie is like tring to explain colors to to a man that has never seen and they still leave even when I told them about it and some of the ways it manifests it self. Oh well there is my novel of a response

Really, the only way to be content is to accept yourself. Otherwise, people who criticize or abandon you will simply destroy all efforts to be happy.

So, for example, you're going to accept that you have a significant disability that makes it difficult to talk to people. Does this mean that you have to stop all work to work on your social skills, or to make friends? Absolutely not! But it does mean that you've accepted that you need to work on it.

As for people not wanting to talk to you after a couple of days...well, I dunno if this will work for you, but maybe you can try to make friends online instead. Like, you can make friends here, and on websites that center around your special interests. What do you think about that?

this is a difficulty for me. depression is. always. Meds help a lot but they don't make me happy. It's just easier to get from one day to the next when I take them. They make me stable more of the time. Less acute anxiety/depression, easier to manage, shorter duration.

Happy? I often wonder if my capacity for that emotion died years ago.

Once you realize you have a mental wiring different from everyone else (labeled NT here), you realize that it's just something you have to work harder at. Some days are better than others. In the end, I just remember Finding Nemo's Dori, "just keep swimming, just keep swimming." That has helped me to see that life just sucks and that you gotta keep going through it. There are some good things and there are some bad things.

Well, as to that, we shall see what we shall see. I am trying.

In my experience the best way to gain happiness is by keeping busy - this keeps you from ruminating negatively and keeps your focus on the present so that you are living in the moment.
If you keep your mind well-occupied and have sufficient social interaction with others this will mean any bad experiences are usually balanced out by good ones and you can remain mentally healthy.
It's not a matter of avoiding bad stuff, you just need to have enough good stuff happen to balance it all out. Bad experiences are a part of life and it's important to learn coping skills to deal with them as opposed to trying to avoid them.

You also need to train your mind not to obsess over negative things as this will make you feel bad. You need to think positively and this will in turn improve how you feel.

Certain types of people take a dislike to me but it doesn't bother me as we usually have nothing in common anyway. If a person goes off you and stops talking don't worry about it - there's plenty more people you'll meet in the future some of whom who will be more friendly. It's the obsessing over these unfriendly people that is making you unhappy.

For me, when I'm feeling unhappy it means that it's time to make some changes. Sometimes these have to be extreme changes, such as relocating and other times it's something a little more easy like taking a class to alleviate boredom and isolation. If the changes don't help, than I need to try something different until I feel better. I try to pin-point exactly what it is that's making me un-happy and generally try to make changes that will eliminate the issue. I tend to not know what the right solution is until I've tried a bunch of different things though.

I keep feeling content (because it's impossible to be happy 24/7) by keeping busy. And I've learned to accept myself, shortcomings and all. Yeah, I may have Asperger's, but it doesn't have me (most of the time, anyway!). Find others who enjoy the things you do. But it comes down to mindset in the end.

rastachucker:

It can be tough, for sure

I wanted to ask some questions...

How would having friends affect your life?
What would a good friendship look like to you? (i.e. the actions, behaviours, activities, etc etc)
Have ALL people you have ever met acted in the way you have described?
What do you have to offer someone in a friendship?
What do you enjoy about being alone? (you can't say "nothing" I am sure there is something )

Just trying to help your mind get clearer about some parts of it is all I think the more we understand about ourselves and how we see and interact with the world can definitely help us to feel more content

I guess that I'm a naturally happy person and being true to myself makes me even more happy. I'm aware that it's not that way for all of us on WP. I guess that I got a little sanguine about giving advice or helping. Should I eat my words, or not?