Unhelpful advice you've been given.

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Unleash your meltdown on them. Whenever I did that people were afraid to mess with me. This might consider you an a**hole, but they leave you the hell alone...and intelligent people see why you reacted so strongly.

I think you just touched on the root of our problem - lack of intelligent people.

"Just be yourself" - yes, that's worked soooo well so far, hasn't it? [sarcasm]

"Just ignore them" (meaning bullies) - you see how well you cope at ignoring 30 kids screaming abuse at you every time you enter a classroom, then come back and tell me how to do it. Besides, if you ignore them it escalates, if they have to call you the rude name 20x today to get a reaction, they'll call you it 30x tomorrow.

*You have to get out there, you won't meet anyone sitting in your room" - I have no-one to get out there with, I'll turn up alone in the middle of all the couples, families and groups of friends, be too nervous to speak to anyone and be either ignored the whole time or creeped on all night. To clarify, a creep is a man who will not leave you alone even after being asked firmly but politely to. Seems the old idea that a woman in a pub or club on her own is up for sex has never gone away.

Exactly, it's about spontaneous processing of situational context. You only have a brief window in which to "try", and if you don't get it w/in a few seconds, it's too late. Trying implies the desire - and ability - to prepare for known variables. It's not like an exam you can prepare for, it's something that just happens to have a longer learning curve for us than others, with lots of trial and error and extrapolation across several of these compartmentalized scenarios. Maybe NTs should TRY harder to figure that out!! !

Everyone would find it difficult on their first attempt/day whatever. Just go with whatever happens, it's simple enough. ( or words to that effect)

lol yeah that's pretty much what I say too.

Indeed; be kind with people you like, but be firm and use logical anger when stupid people piss you off. Earns you respect from the people worth it...although society tends not to see it that way. that's mostly because society is mostly stupid people. Just gotta find the intelligent people worth trusting...

When I was in Elementary school, my meltdowns became almost legendary. "Matt may be small, but DO NOT make him mad whatever you do!" It was respect of a sort, I suppose..
I still hate this "Group therapy will definitely be good for you." No, it will not. I am almost phobic about groups pf people. True, I eventually got use to the Crohn's/Colitis support group, but it took a few months. Forget about sensitive emotional issues folks. NOT HAPPENING.
"Just try to fit in!" Like wise..

Sincerely,
Matthew

This came a la band camp, during a particularly stressful day:

"Suck it up."

I was not amused.

I've had two therapists in a row, when inevitable communication issues arise and they obviously have no idea how to deal with someone on the spectrum (as they are trained to be vague with questions), tell me that the best way to have therapy is with someone who doesn't know how to communicate with me because then I will be forced to learn.

really frustrating.

That only ensures failure.

Conversation with my parents twenty minutes ago:

"Go out somewhere, walk up to someone and just start talking to them for 30 seconds. If you hit it off, great, if not, oh well."

1. Why the hell would I want to do that?
2. It would take me more than 30 seconds to be able to say "Hi" to them, let alone talk... let alone "hit it off"
3. I wasn't actually look for advice about making friends... they completely misunderstood what I was trying to tell them. -bashes head on desk-

I think I was lucky in being assigned the therapist I was. She has never asked me a vague question. I suppose that comes with experience dealing with people on the spectrum. I know that I am not the first person with AS that she has treated.

"You have a lot to offer, so speak up!"

The cafeteria lady said that to me when I was 17 and ashamed of my accent at the time.

"But, you have to live in the present!"

My mum was saying that to me once a year since I decided to be myself once more in the September of 2009. I was living in the present between the February of 2007 and the August of 2009 and I relapsed back into my Depression, Anxiety and Psychosis. I was hooked on energy drinks, because I felt dead inside. My mum stopped saying that to me, because I put my foot down and made a stand.

"I want you to have a nice figure when you grow up, like you do now."

My dad said that when he was telling me that I've got to slow down my eating when I was 12. My parents, aunt and common law uncle were talking about how big my youngest cousin just under two years older than me and how he's been sneaking cookies. I told everyone that I felt left out of the conversation, because I was trying to stand up for my cousin by saying that people come in all shapes and sizes. My dad twisted my words, and everybody had to join in saying that girls stopped growing at 14 and I should shrink my portions. I was angry at my dad for twisting my words and at God for making me female for the rest of the evening. I grumbled to myself as I was falling asleep that night, "What if I don't want to have a nice figure when I grow up?" I guess that God heard me, because I grew up to be a big, strong person who looks like Mick Avory, the biggest (huskiest) and strongest member of the original Kinks lineup. Part of it had to do with me keeping up the eating for a while, as a way of rebelling against my biological gender and my dad's idea of how women should look, and part of it had to do with my wonderful genes.

that's lucky. I was the first for both and realized with #2 that exact same problems arose, and had / have a little better rapport with her so I asked why the vagueness. She said they are taught to be unspecific so as not to lead the person anywhere in particular. they are meant to draw out knowledge the person already has of him/herself. This isn't what an ASD person needs at all. Also they both refused the concept of "normal" but I needed to ask things like: how do normal people make connections with one another? I had to insist that I be allowed to make that distinction - it was pointless and frustrating to be denied that. What I was trying to figure out was: where are my deficits, what am I missing? What do people expect to get out of their interaction with one another? What am I not seeing that someone might assume I have read and deliberately acted (or not acted) upon? It's hard to even articulate these concepts. If a therapist can't believe or doesn't understand that you truly miss so much, they just push you to try harder (which yes, means more failure) instead of helping you understand.

A waste of my time, really.

When you say, I need quiet. I need to go somewhere else to complete this task. I can't walk and chew gum at the same time, so will drop it, if there is such racket. Drop. "Just pay closer attention."