Accepting compliments, gratitude, etc...

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I hate being given gifts, because the gifts I am given are rarely useful, and then I have to fake gratitude for the sake of the other person's feelings, even though the useless gift is just going to end up one more piece of clutter in an already cluttered house.

Compliments are awkward. I'm usually being complimented on something that I did not find particularly compliment-worthy. And when I do feel like I deserve one, no one pays any attention to my achievements.

I have a very hard time expressing gratitude. where someone feels like I am not really grateful for something that they have done for me. Like today my husband found a great deal on laser tag for my son and I and I was really excited because my son had been asking for months to go to laser tag but my husband had felt like he was being bothersome to me and that I didn't want the deal. Even after expressing that I wanted and appreciated it dearly. He complains that my monotone voice in everything shows disinterest even when interested. Compliments don't bug me to much, they make me blush mostly because I'm shy. Gifts on the other hand I don't know what to say most of the time, I haven't figured out if it's that I don't really like receiving them, I don't like what I got and don't really know how to fake excited so I seem disappointed, gifts are just confusing to me. Although, I usually get highly excited when I buy someone else a gift because if I'm getting you something it means I took extra time to find something I know you wanted or will like and you're not going to get that same feeling I get with a fake disappointed approval.

I find birthdays and christmas are also great times to find out who you are close to and who actually knows you by what they give. People who know me know I don't have room for stuff to just sit around and know what i'm into, so when people give me stuff for stuffs sake I get stuck in a emotional communication hole I can't claw out of, very embarising.

As a only child (for mom) and an only local grandson I get bothered on birthdays quite alot. This year I got sick the week before so I had a sort of reason to get out of most of it! Usally I settle for a casuel lunch with Grandma, no telling the diner or opening gifts on site so no silly embarising singing happens! I also won't open any gifts till after the technical birth time(its late in the day) so I will often be alone when I do it. easier that way, still annoying but in 23 years i've learned some things.

It kinda depends.

If it's a compliment on my cooking I accept it readily.

If it's a compliment on my singing, I get embarrassed -- I don't sing in front of people for that reason.

Paying me a compliment on the way I look is the worst. I almost NEVER dress up because I hate it so badly. I had to dress for a job interview a few weeks ago, and my mom's boyfriend thought I looked so nice that he pointed me out to a couple of carpenter guys -- who I DID NOT know -- who were working on his house. He went on and on -- "Don't she look nice?" and "Ain't she just the purtiest thing you ever saw?" (He's a country boy). I was horrified! I had to leave the scene, I walked back to the car and broke into tears. I was THAT embarrassed.

Yes, I have this too, though in the past a lot more than now.

I'm going to be minimalist here, and say that nowadays I usually simply say 'Thank you', and move on to the next thing. It helps to accompany the 'Thank you' with a smile, a voice inflection to imply appreciation or gladness, and sometimes I say a bit more than just 'thank you', like 'Thank you very much, that's so sweet!' or 'That's really kind!'. Usually, the niceties of the transaction end there, and you can drop it. I was very awkward in this regard in the past, and I still tend to reply in a shy, modest way, but I found that practice really does make perfect. It becomes a rote thing, but I take care that it doesn't come across as mechanical or emotionless.

I actually like it when people compliment me. If I am good at doing something, I don't see why people shouldn't say I am. I simply hear the compliment and think "ok, I knew I was good at it".

I was raised with manners so i always say thank you and that's usually all i say is thank you.
Same with gifts. I am very uncomfortable getting them, i would rather not get any, however i just say thank you.
My mother always said to say thank you so the other person would know that i appreciate the thought/gesture etc

It's easier to overhear a compliment or to get it second-hand, instead of directly.

I've done some things I'm kind of proud of, but I'll probably never get compliments from certain people about them. My mother passed away years ago, but my father is still alive. However, he'll probably never notice the new section of my Website, and that's probably for the best. How would I explain it? He doesn't even know I've been diagnosed or that my sisters and I think he's on the spectrum. He's a conspiracy theorist, and I think he suspects vaccines of causing autism, but he's so far gone into his conspiracy theorizing that i don't think I can convince him to let that one go. Instead, he'd probably freak out about my diagnosis, or simply disbelieve it, so I'll never hear from him that he's proud of me for what I've accomplished with my site. I worked hard on creating that resource, but neither parent can congratulate me now. I feel kind of sad about it. My father has said he's proud of me for other things, though, including the parts of the Website he has already seen, and I've been able to sort of store the compliments for later processing, which helps me to deal with them.

One of my sisters has seen my site, and she's linked to it from her blog. In one of her blog posts, she also mentioned it with some nice praise that I could digest privately, at home, taking all the time I need to process it. The other sister hasn't seen the site yet, and I don't know if she'll ever be interested enough. But she's generally supportive, so that's decent.

Same problem, i guess its part of the loner attitude, to be self reliant.

I really dont want anything from anyone, and least of all their fake attitudes.

and people dont need to thank me for doing stuff, i dont know why normal people like or need this, sometimes it seems like for even the smallest things, thanks for this, and thanks for that, and that was very kind right. just stop talking or no more help dammit.