Do i have aspergers, or am I just weird.

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Okay, my other problem is I don't have many friends now. But i'm kind of in transition since I have onyl 2 part time jobs. But anymore, I don't feel motivated to socialize other than talking to my best friend about every week or so. I do like to party sometimes, but I get nervous. Like I love going out to dance, but I'm afraid to ask girls, so I just go around talking to people and drinking (not too much though). But yes I guess you could say I care a lot about my social life

Let me start by saying that for years i've always thought i was an NT. I have a brother who has high functioning Autism, and i've always felt that I was fairly social and normal, I just struggled more than others.

However, ever since i've turned 15, I've wondered if I'm autistic or (no offense to those with AS) some Aspie wierdo. Here are some things that make me wonder if I am. Ever since I was about 11 or 12, i've done things like write down sports scores and lists of sports teams and what leagues they are in, and of course I throw them away because its a time waster, but I do it again, and for some reason i find it interesting.

I also am wierd in that while I like regular movies and love going to movies in theatres with people, i watch documentaries on my netflix, especially Ken Burns and PBS type stuff. I love history and geography, and do plan to teach it (i'll get to my job struggles later) however I find it odd since no one else really watches those. I also don't read a lot of fiction (though I mostly read the newspaper, and do love some fiction books like the hobbit, and catcher in the rye) I do things like read encyclopedias (though not as much as when I was young like age 6 to about 12) . I also like geography and do wierd things like write down lists of cities and their populations in certain decades, but once again I try not to because I find it weird.

also, I don't struggle as socially as most aspies, but it is hard. In high school I went to a small Catholic high school. While I loved doing things like Drama and football, and speech, I also was kind of an outsider. A lot of popular kids didn't like me. First it was because I didn't drink or do drugs and was vocal about it (I even called kids dumb drunks and crap like that) but of course I was also made fun of and called fag and fudgepacker and got so mad I threatened a kid. So of course high school sucked.
College was better. I made more friends and actually started to have more of a social life rather than video games and just hanging with my family (since I didn't really go out much other than school events). However, I only had a few close friends, and for some reason I always felt like i never quite fit in even when I was a part of a group. Anyway, being back home has been a drag. I only have 3 or 4 friends I actually talk to. I also don't have a lot to do, and since its me and my Autistic brother just here, I sometimes get bored, or when things don't work I take it out on my brother (he's 22, I'm almost 24).

Lastly, my job struggles make me wonder if i'm an aspie. I plan on becoming a social studies teacher. Anyway i've had 3 interviews, and haven't got a job. I know its normal for this to happen, but I wonder if my body language is awkward. I always get really nervous about job interviews and become really self conscious. Sure sometimes I warm up and get better, but I always worry I look and act like a freak. It doesn't help that my mom often picks at wierd things I do when I talk to her. Like for some reason I always jerk my head, especially when she is talking to me when she is disappointed in me, and of course it makes me self conscious and I do it more. She also thinks I make weird faces, and sometimes talk in a weird voice (my voice changes when i'm tired to a more deep but scratchy, voice, where as normally I have a very pleasant and expressive voice, which people often complement me on). All of this just makes me wonder if i'm some aspie wierdo who will have to live on disability the rest of his life, or struggle in minimum wage jobs forever. I also worry i'll never have a girlfriend or relationship. I've never really had one. I've dated plenty of girls, but theres only one girl who i've had more than one date with. All the rest say i'm "nice" but just not right for them. I know this happens, but after 7 or 8 dates? Also, i'm often afraid to ask girls out. I don't have many girl friends (only two or three really) who i'm not interested in, which makes me wonder if i have aspergers. One last symptom I have is that since I've been young i've hit my own head when angry. I've heard this is common in Autistics and I worry that it was either a sign of autism, or i've made myself autistic due to brain damage

The only things that make me think I don't have it are that I am somewhat social (though I do have some shy tendencies, including my fear of rejection, though part of it stems from the fact i'm overweight and feel i'm ugly). I also am very polite and not very blunt. I try and humor people and know how to act socially (although I wonder if people are just nice and don't tell me if I have weird body language or something like that). I also seem to be very worried about my social life, which I know some autistics could care less about. I also don't really go on and on about the same subject and carry on conversations well with people.

So overall, I just want to know if i'm an aspie. I know only a doctor can tell, but it worried me. I guess I feel it would make me strange or wierd or that girls will think i'm messed up. it also doesn't help that my mom keeps saying I have tendencies (even though she's a special ed teacher and is okay with it. She just thinks I should work on better skills, even though she lets my brother revel in his obsessions of star wars and star trek to the point that its his whole life:() I'm just wondering what people on this site think. I do feel that maybe i'm normal, but then i have these wierd tendencies and it makes me wonder if i'm undiagnosed with aspergers.

Sry for the long post and thanks for your help.