Waterfalls wrote:
How do people define a meltdown or shutdown? I'm not sure where to draw a line between this and just stressed.
I can only tell you my own definition for what those terms mean to me, if that's helpful. Just stressed is when I'm feeling tense, fed up, but I'm managing to still stay functional, get things done, feeling unhappy but able to function.
Meltdown for me is when too many stress factors have piled up in too short and compressed a time period, and without sufficient time for the "just stressed" periods to fade away, the just stressed is now turning into serious frustrations, anger, which in turn starts to be inability to cope. I then have a freak-out -- I scream, I cry and can't stop crying, I'm pacing around yelling out loud a diatribe about the thing or things that have tipped me past this tipping point. It usually happens in my own apartment while I'm alone, but today it happened in public.
So basically, to me anyway, "just stressed" is me gritting my teeth but still functioning. Meltdown is totally losing it, screaming, sobbing, deep distress, massive unhappiness and frustration, bursting out in a total volcano erupting.
Shutdown for me is what follows that. When I start to come down from the volcanic emotions of frustration and "exploded stress," I begin to "numb out." I get deeply non-functioning.
My executive functioning goes to hell in a handbasket. I go into a zombie-like depression caused by the exhaustion of the meltdown and the emotions of extreme distress that brought about the meltdown. It's almost like I go into a state of shock -- shock not at my own meltdown but at
the things that caused the meltdown, if that makes any sense. It's like my second reaction to the events that caused my distress, like the next stage in my reaction to them.
Sometimes I've had a shutdown of sorts without the meltdown preceding it. That usually happens in social setting in which I've become too overloaded. I will go directly into shutdown -- I will begin to respond less and less, withdraw more and more, feel numb and a bit "shocked", not want to speak anymore, and I just want to go away into a quiet place.
This is what these things are like for me, I only speak for myself and what I define as the things I call my meltdowns, shut downs or just stress
.