Are you an "out of the closet" aspie?

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I told people at work and at my Tuesday night games club, because it's just a way of explaining why I am the way I am (which would be "weird" ).

And if someone knows more about AS than I think, I ask them how they know it.

I am 60, "Bookish" was the common term for such people. They read, and spoke like books.

Wearing tweeds completed the picture. I was just a typical college professor, I was fifteen, but the image worked.

There was a bit of a transition later, "Geek" originally meant someone who bit the heads off of live chickens in a sideshow. But "Computer Technician" was two big words in a row, and IT, was mistaken for TM, or maybe Scientology.

Nerd had a lot of buck tooth negitives. Products are advertised as "No nerds needed."

Alpha Geek only works with the educated.

I publish and market educational programs on the web, and if asked what, Mathematics.

It is something they do not think they would understand, and credit my differance to spending my time talking to computers. When a store clerk asks, How are you? I lift may hands to an imaginary keyboard and type, while speaking in a computer voice. "Fine, good to get away from the office and see real people."

I do not understand AS. I lived quite well without it till a month ago. I have no musical talent and cannot draw. I lack an understanding of many terms used on WP. New things mix, is Leet a symtom or a cause of AS? All I know is I relate. I cannot explain it to myself, could not explain it to the WPeers, and the rest of the world would just become confused.

I have told people that I am not sane enough to understand the world, or crazy enough to be locked up, and most say, "Welcome to the club."

As for AS, I do not see it. We do have something in common, AS is getting three yes out of a dozen questions? Even seven out of ten would leave doubts. I do have WP, but doubt the science behind AS.

You have a right to remain silent, anything you say will be taken down and used against you.

Even a nod acknowledging the statment can be used against you. Say Not Guilty, and the first word might get dropped, then it will be claimed you confessed. No one will tell you, till you get to court, then you can tell the Judge he got it wrong?

Remain silent, name, rank, serial number, only. I would like to speak to my lawyer, is the only other thing to say. AS may not be a protected disability, leave them guessing.

Even if they think something is the matter with you, why help?

AS is only a small part of my personality, the rest is just someone you really dont want to piss off.

When I started my new job at "The Dog Hotel",there were several animal related books on a table for customers to read.I brought in my copy of..."All Cats Have Aspergers" and slipped it in with the rest.Someone said their sister has "very mild AS" and I told her to tell her sister about WP.I mentioned,very casually that I also had AS.Someone asked what that was and I said...."it's a lot of things but mostly for me means sometimes I'm shy and have a hard time in social situations"..end of their education.If they want to know more(which I doubt),they can google it.


I dont think many people know what it is and I dont think most people care to know.If they ask for more info,I will talk their ear off(that will teach those nosey folks what "aspie interest" is all about,lol)

I mentioned it in my holiday letter and I've told a few key people, but I haven't broadcast it.

No, you don't want to piss off a full grown Aspie who is not afraid of you!

It appears you are going through the "Am I Really One?" stage that happens after Relief that there is someone else like me. We're too old to let Asperger's define us as we have been defined in too mnay other ways and rejected all of them. Most aspies our age are self defined.

Bookish intellectual is the best front. At least no one will think you a total dork who can't find his way out of a paper bag.

Some people at work know, all my family do. Havin said that, I've always been suspect for AS. I've always been regarded as a little wired/mildy eccentric and been openly told as such, so it is not a problem to explain why when I am in such a situation. I generaly adopt a persona along with my uniform at work so I think I get away with being AS at work by being as NT as I can. I like bein AS, given that I know no different, so why not enjoy being yourself?

When I got my diagnosis in December I disclosed it to close family who accepeted it. I divulged I had AS to some friends they did not buy it and thought it was a joke.

It's kind of an interesting story. For a long time after finding about AS and getting my diagnosis, i never did share that information with anybody. I wasn't proud of it. Now, I find myself telling more people (i don't tell complete strangers) but I find myself telling people I kind of know about it, which was something I never used to do either.

I'm still hesitant with telling people, but it's more of the fact that I don't know how to explain it to people.

I've only had one discussion/argument with somebody trying to tell me i didn't have it because everybody has difficulties/problems dealing with society and how to act and expressing emotions. That ticked me off.

I think a lot of us here have had problems with people saying that kind of thing. I wonder WTF goes on in those people's heads... do they think it's in the DSM as some kind of joke? Of course everyone has social struggles now and then. If AS is diagnosable then obviously an Aspie's social issues go a little beyond the norm! !!

It's also fun when a friend decides that you don't have AS, like they're some kind of expert. Then when you do something really Aspie they get all upset and it's like they don't know why you would do such a thing, and you just want to slap them.

I'm out of the closet to people who mention my strange behavior or people who I'm close to. It's just a word that helps explain myself when people are interested. I'd never be in the closet about being queer either, but I'm not shouting it out in the streets, because it's my business.

Wait, there is one exception that I need to get over: When I mentioned it to my sister she made fun of me, and I've never mentioned it again. I need to educate her somehow, without feeling bad about myself.

I know *exactly* how you feel in that respect. I was talking to someone online and he had just been talking about going out with all his friends and going to bars, which I don't like, so I told him why. He just says "Well, I have social problems too." so I had to say, "Yeah, but you can walk into a bar without feeling threatened and can live with roommates. There's a difference in the degree here."

My sister doesn't think I have it, but she won't do any research on it either, so she knows nothing about it.

I am an "In the Closet" Aspie because it's just a lot easier to keep a secret and let the world think I'm normal rather than having to explain it again, over and over, to people who would never fully understand what it means to have AS and be an Aspie.

I could explain it to an endless series of people unti I was blue in the face. And in the end, no one would trully comprehend it fully. And the moment I go back to acting as NT as I could, the NT people would quickly just forget about my AS. Without thinking, they would go back to seeing me normal again, forgetting I have AS. Eventually, something would happen as it always does. And they would start to think I was a freak.

So the soul-eating lie is easier to deal with than (in my mind) having to remind everyone at every step that I'm an Aspie. Would they ever really understand?...

I'm in the closet... mostly because I don't want to use it as an excuse for anything... I'm worried that if I told everyone about it I would start expecting all kinds of accomodations and I would become less functioning.

I also don't think anyone in my life would understand. And unless I could explain it to them in writing, I wouldn't be able to explain...

I finally told my ex-wife about me having AS (I didn't find out until we were already divorced). She is an understanding person. And within one week of telling her, she told me that she was tired of hearing about AS. "Ass burgers" she would jokingly call it.

I would show all the little occasions where AS would affect me. And within a week she already tired of me talking about it. And if everyone would have this reaction, then maybe you would understand why I wouldn't want to tell anyone else. Because maybe everyone else would have just about the same reaction.

I didn't tell anyone for ages, then I got brave and told my daughter and asked her to take a few online tests, she came out in the NT range as I thought she would.

A friend I have had all my life has ADHD or something similar and we talked about how our issues affected us; it was good to share it all with him and he felt the same too.

There are a few others that now know because they are affected with the same thing or ADD.

I hid it for a long time but now if it came up, I would just say, after all, I have nothing to be ashamed of and I have already been told I am weird and other things without saying, so if I was teased or anything, it wouldn't make much difference really.

This has been such a big turning point for me and done so much for my self confidence when I found out that I don't much care what others think.