Why do people assume i'm rude?

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It might not be what you are saying, it might be what you are thinking. For example, when I first met my ex, my parents first impression of him was that he was an a**hole. Why? Because he was telling them how I will never be able to do this or that and my mom said "oh yes she can, she is very smart" and his response was "she was in special ed." He also said to them after we were moving out of his apartment how they dumbed down my school work and my mom told me she just wanted to slap him when he said that about me and told me it was an insult and told me what it meant.

Yes honesty does bring out your true colors and I think the difference is NTs know what not to say because they know how it will come of as to others and what they will think of them. They want to make a good impression of themselves so they filter what they share. Aspies don't have that filter so they show their true colors more so people know what we really think so they form an opinion about us based on our own opinions.

To tie into Olympiadas' philosophy: If you're direct and to the point that doesn't allow the other person to "game" you. If you can't be manipulated they have no use for you. People want you to emotionally connect with them, if you don't they can't emotionally use you which is how they've been taught to get things done.

Example: when I was studying music I had an instructor that would give a compliment then give a critique, the compliment was intended to make me receptive to the critique. I told him I'd rather him just get to the critique since that was the real point of the lessons and I didn't like wasting valuable learning time. He called me rude for the suggestion. His inability to emotionally manipulate me upset him so much he referred me to another professor for private lessons.

In my experience, neurotypical generally like it when you work this way :

1.In your mind you want to state the truth to someone but you still want to be friendly.
2. The message gets filtered or 'sugar coated'.
3. The message gets reconstructed and reviewed one more time so you look as neutral as possible to the other person instead of a bad person.
4. Message delivered.

I usually stop at 50% of step 1.