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RadiationHazard
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21 Apr 2007, 4:55 am

EXTREMELY Defensively.
I tend to take criticism, unless I calm myself down and force myself to listen, as a direct attack on my person. Almost as if it were a physical attack. I hate it THAT MUCH.

Doesn't mean I don't listen to it sometimes. I just have to force myself to.


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Sopho
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21 Apr 2007, 4:57 am

I am very sensitive to criticism



Kosmonaut
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21 Apr 2007, 5:05 am

Criticism is good.
Without criticism we would not get anywhere; part of the Hegelian dialetic.

Personal criticism is different; more like school-children name-calling. I could not care less about this. Why should i care what others think of me ?



BenJ
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21 Apr 2007, 5:41 am

When other people constructively criticise me I assume that they are being unreasonable. Often I realise that they are not or someone will point it out to me. I think my AS makes me misread the intentions of others in this regard.



Kosmonaut
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21 Apr 2007, 6:01 am

BenJ wrote:
When other people constructively criticise me I assume that they are being unreasonable. Often I realise that they are not or someone will point it out to me. I think my AS makes me misread the intentions of others in this regard.


Yes: you need to develop a filtering system which works for you.

This is constructive criticism.

[Actually, my own such system would have the most difficulty with comments such as 'you need to do...'. Especially when personal criticism was not asked for. Usually this is a sign of unreasonable 'name-calling'. But i assure you it is constructive. ]



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21 Apr 2007, 6:03 am

It's not a good quality to have, but my tolerance of criticism depends on what I think of something, myself. Sometimes, I think that something is wrong and that's when I appreciate criticism and become angry by compliments. Likewise, if I think something is right I appreciate compliments but take criticism personally.



9CatMom
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21 Apr 2007, 9:41 am

As a child, very defensively. I went to school with some really mean people who threatened me and inflicted bodily harm. The fear carried over to my home life and I reacted very defensively to criticism, unjustly.

Today, I feel embarrassed. I know I did something boneheaded and stupid, and there is really no way of explaining it away.



nicklegends
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21 Apr 2007, 10:36 am

Graelwyn wrote:
I have always been very sensitive to criticism, taking it totally personally, and usually finding I automatically lash out in response to it, or feign disinterest etc...or argue even. How does everyone else here respond to criticism?


One time I had to sit down with my teacher while she commented on my recent History presentation. While I didn't physically appear to be upset, I certainly was inside. I subconsciously made comments trying to explain why I did the things she criticized, which she took to be refuting her advice.

In general, though, criticism is difficult for me to handle, even though I don't want it to be. Teachers always say, "relax, Ed, it's not that big a deal," and I want to relax, but something prevents me.



DejaQ
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21 Apr 2007, 10:56 am

I hate criticism when I'm just going through life normally ("Stand up straight," "Say thank you to the nice man," "You're not cooking that correctly!") I also hate it when I'm criticized for things people don't understand. For instance in history I did a video report on JFK, which I was only able to trim it down to fourteen minutes from a ten-page essay, and I had to cut out the explanation of Jack Ruby's varying claims for his motive in killing Oswald, so just about everyone shouted "Because he killed the president!"

However, whenever someone gets a glimpse of something I've worked on, I will get very upset if they don't criticize me, because otherwise it's just "Wow! That is so awesome!" and if I don't receive criticism I won't know how to improve my work (For instance, screwing up the eyes on a drawing).



Starbuline
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21 Apr 2007, 1:01 pm

I get all defensive and then I criticize them for being such an ass to me.



SeriousGirl
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21 Apr 2007, 3:30 pm

If people would learn how to offer constructive criticism appropriately, it would be alot easier to take. When I was young, I always reacted defensively. As an adult, I do not suffer reprimands any longer and I try to stop myself from emotionally reacting to it and then I think about it and see if it has merit.

Then later, I'll discuss it: "I see your point about that." Then elaborate on whether I agree or disagree. We don't see ourselves objectively, but criticism needs to be given in a kindly, constructive way.


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Slapula
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21 Apr 2007, 3:38 pm

At work: I take all the criticism and use it to improve my job performance (which is why I am always asking for feedback from my bosses)

At any other time: I just ignore it... :oops: Most of the criticism comes from being anti-social or boring, which is why I ignore it.



Neuromancer
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21 Apr 2007, 3:40 pm

Danielismyname wrote:
Graelwyn wrote:
Do you not speak ?


I speak verbally to my mother, sister and some medical professionals I feel comfortable around when I’m in their domain; no one else though. Sometimes I go completely mute to those I trust (which is only my mother, she’s the only person who I am “me” around) when I feel overwhelmed. I guess this equates to speaking.

Written word is another matter completely, obviously.


I stood at this kind of parcial mute state from the 14 to 16 years old, and after then I expanded the amout of people I could talk.
I remember I only notice it was a problem when a girl classmate asked me something that I had to answer, and I tryed a "yes", that in fact sounded like a bear sound.
Well, but this happened a long time ago, now I go to beaches and talk a lot to the naked girls at the crowd.



nb411
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21 Apr 2007, 6:46 pm

The only criticism I don't like is over things I can't help, especially when repeated to me more thqan once. These are AS related things.

However I do have a very thick skin and enjoy criticism which I can learn from. I am disconnected from the taking it personally and people can say something really harsh or straight up, provided it's not purely insulting and I will take it and learn from it.

I really hate it when I offer someone criticism in a friendly way because I can see that it would help them and they respond with something like."Hey! No I don't!..." etc. and then try to insult me back even though I was not insulting them. When that happens I just walk away, you can't reason with people's insecurities. Sometimes they will come back to later and say, "hey you know you were right." That's when I feel like going DUH and slapping them :D



IdahoRose
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21 Apr 2007, 7:05 pm

Even the slightest criticism can leave me feeling upset for days.



richie
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21 Apr 2007, 7:09 pm

If it is "constructive" (read: correction), I respond well. If it is destructive then I
answer malice with malice. :evil: