Is it for a family to "not accept" their ASD child?

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I think this is a common problem for people on the spectrum, because we're in an age where there is very little tolerance for the autistic. I had issues with my dad and my older brother when I was younger, but that had less to do with them "not accepting" me and more to do with the fact that they have a poor understanding of autism (for example, when I had meltdowns, they would reprimand me and assume that it was just me being naughty, acting like that on purpose.)

My folks were raised as old-school conservative Christians. They were taught that all non-conforming behaviors were moral failings.

They're in their 80's now & much has changed. As best they can, they accept that society has moved away from that model and recognizes that different people have different neurologies. So, they are...sometimes accepting, sometimes merely tolerant, but never quite grokking that it's not just a now-socially-acceptable excuse for what they consider antisocial (ie non-conforming) behavior.

I am very close to my immediate family, but I wouldn't say they accept me for who I am. Then again I'm not sure if I accept them for who they are. I find my brother and mother to be far too emotional and lack self-control. That said, I don't try to force my opinion on how one should act onto them. Whereas they try to force theirs onto me, simply because they dislike any behavior that doesn't conform to society's expectations.

Despite how poor our relationship was when growing up, my father has become the only one in the family to really accept me. Even though he was a bully and authoritarian when I was a child, now he just wants me to be happy.

I felt that my father accepted me, but he was the aspie member of the couple. My mother, who was NT, attacked me in various ways when she wasn't trying to control or change me. We had a very conflicted relationship, but I knew since the age of 10 or so that I couldn't trust her to be on my side.

My parents and relatives accept me and always have, no matter how weird I was.

I think some family members get pleasure from my pain. I thought things were bad in 2010.

My mom is doing well, trying, and knows what she's doing. And she hits the spot, most at the time. She's more accepting than she had been after all those years.
My dad, on the other hand, might've been a denier. Mostly because either he's ignorant of my case or ignorant of what's happening around. He never watched me grew.
Whenever my case or diagnosis is bought up, they fight.

My sister's rather tolerant. Yet she never pressed any issues; just some typical annoyed sibling reaction and nothing specific.
The rest of my relatives... I'm not sure. Some are patronizing, some are cruel, and some are just fine whether they knew of it or not.

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My dad totally accepts it, making sure that I am properly informed ahead of time of anything non-routine happening in the near future, being willing to listen to me ramble about a special interest every now and again, and being tolerant of my aspie tendencies.

My mom is currently accepting of my Aspergers, but she wasn't always like that. She used to insist that I was capable of doing the things that come easily to NTs like herself and that my failure was because of laziness.

My sister knows that I have Aspergers, but she doesn't really know what it is.

I am not sure if the older of my two brothers even knows that I am an aspie. If he does then he doesn't care.

My youngest brother and I are quite close. He is NT but he also is not very social and he is quite nerdy. He doesn't know a ton about Aspergers, but he is very accepting of my quirkiness.

My extended family knows this I am a massive nerd, and I have done a good enough job at acting that they probably don't know that I am an aspie.

My parents were very critical of my Aspie quirks/issues & how my other mental & physical disabilities affect me even thou they thought I was autistic sense I was a toddler & became aware of my other disabilities when I was young. They cant understand & relate to having problems.

I am becoming more convinced that I will never be able to have any kind of relationship with my brothers, nearly 5 years after mom died and I was diagnosed. 2 of them will flat out tell you I'm a f!cking liar, psychology and psychiatry are full of bullsh!t, and I'm a lazy SOB that deserves to die, or rot in maximum security prison for the rest of my miserable life. They still blame me for mom's death (she died after complications from nearly bleeding out on me, due to a peptic ulcer. She was in the hospital for 6 months, then in a nursing home for 3 months before she died). The youngest brother and his wife, even though he has 2 kids on the spectrum, consider me to be a worthless bum, since I'm on SSDI. All of them are of the opinion you work until you drop dead, then get back up and start working until you drop dead again. Lather, Rinse, Repeat. (I was the worst of the bunch with that attitude.). Last time I spoke to any of them was over Christmas, and even then I got the f!ck you attitude. The next to the youngest I haven't talked to since mom died, since I was told I would be arrested for trespassing if I came within 500 feet of what used to be mom's house, which he now owns.

My high school's graduating class motto was "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams." What a crock of sh!t! My dreams have been nothing but nightmares, and still continue to be that way!

I think it's pretty common, but luckily, it's not a problem I've experienced. Some of my extended family decided to ostracize us when I was very young, but not because of autism. (More because my parents think abuse is a bad thing and needs to be spoken out against.) But those who didn't ostracize us then have never had a problem with me being weird or autistic. In fact, most of my Dad's extended family (who I know better than Mom's) are on the broader autism phenotype themselves. (Many seem to be undiagnosed ADHD and or learning disabled - a whole lot of very smart people who struggled in school.) I've never really stuck out for being weird, because they're all weird too.

My Mother ignored doctors saying I'm Autistic, and My Sister still doesn't accept I don't understand social customs, If I don't like I gift I tell them.