Social milestones like marriage and kids

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BOY have I hijacked. Sorry. Moving on.

I really feel like we have a lot in common. I am 30 myself. I tried to date a lot in the past, been in some serious relationships, but more and more I am growing to believe that it just isn't all for me. Whenever I am with someone, I spend so much time trying to quell the urge to run. At this point in my life I am tired of what I am supposed to do. I just RUN darn it!

but people around me don't understand, even friends and family. As people with your and my special interests might understand:

Guy I'm dating: "Wouldn't your father have wanted you to stay in the game?"
Me: "He would, but he didn't know you. He'd loath your behavior and soooooooo do I!"

....I'm not going to lie. Despite what all I just said, seeing your profile picture and signature makes me feel just a wee bit
I have the score sitting on my music stand at home, and have the two-CD set in my car as we speak.

I don't think there are many of us to find...


Or completely confuse people. Since the social assumption is that marriage (or at least being somewhere on the relationship escalator) is something everyone should aspire to.


Not wanting "normal" relationships does not equate to not wanting relationships at all. I've always found it very hard to express that I want something other than being in a couple...

Sexual and romantic orientations need not be congruent. Disinterest in the likes of marriage (especially if lifelong) sounds more like aromatic... Might be helpful to look up the term "amatonormativity" too.

Whoaaaa you just quoted Chess to me! I've never really found someone who shares my interest in that particular song.

mpe - I like the term "relationship escalator". When I was younger I thought I had romantic feelings, maybe twice in my life I've gotten overly attached to one person and assumed that it meant there were romantic feelings there - but there never were. There was attachment, but not romantic love. I just assumed that I was supposed to have romantic feelings for at least someone on this planet, and thought that must be what it was. It wasn't. I don't really know what it was.

How'd that old grade school song go again? Oh yeah, Fern and invisibleboy sitting in a tree....

"Why'd you have to do this to me?"

"What's going on around me
Is barely making sense.
I need some explanations fast."

XD

I sometimes feel like that song, "Nobody's Side", is my ASD anthem. What you quoted could be one of my daily thoughts. And then the rest of the song sounds almost like it's listing social rules. I was describing the song in detail at one of my diagnostic appointments and he asked me to sing it. And then he wrote in the report that I was talking about the musical Cats.

Several doctors I've run into since have said "theatre is not a usual interest for people with autism". Yeah because autism is about doing what is expected.

This is getting off topic, but I like this topic.

Man! Your diagnostic appointments sound fun! I just took a bunch of standardized tests with people watching me and scribbling notes, and then in the oral interview part the guy said "So your mom tells me that your dog just died." and I cried until he let me leave. I was a lot younger then.


I got into it because my two older sisters are into theater. They acted and stage managed. I did a little acting, but not any really big roles. Throughout high school though, I played in our pit orchestra. I felt at home there, where I could enjoy playing every musical, but I was in the dark, hidden, where people's stares couldn't find me.


Agreed!
I have to go work now, but hey, if you want to chat more about musicals or whatever, feel free to pm me anytime!

-Fern