If you could tell NTs to stop saying something...

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Oh I HATE this one! Even @ 42 I still can't handle the eye contact issue. I can look at people for longer periods of time now but for a whole 3-4 minutes then I have to stim like crazy later.

So my list is as follows:

1. "Look at me when I talk to you!"
2. "Stop fidgeting!"
3. "What's wrong with you?"
4. (Laughing at me)
5. (Insulting how precise I speak)
6. (Insulting how much I have to say)
7. (Insulting my clothing choices)
8. (Staring at me when I stim)
9. (Staring because I wear a diaper)
10. (Leaving when I appear)
11. (Interupting me)
13. "You can't be Autistic! You look normal!"

That I talk too much. The truth is you talk MORE than me. (NOT you, but the neurotypical who usually does this). They are criticizing me for something they do. Then as soon as I stop they act relieved.

i have nothing against NT's whoever they are, but if i am not interested in what someone is saying i just tell them "i'm sorry but i am not interested"

even though i am not really sorry, i make that gesture of apology.

some woman i was talking to got heated about the aborigine problems and she was part aborigine and i said i have no knowledge about it, and she said "well let me tell you about it" and i said "yeah i'll be right . don't worry" she got the s**ts.

another asian man wanted to show me an iphone video of his recent wedding and i said that i was not interested. it's all the same to me.
i was thinking "you are just one of billions of asians all with their own stories to tell" but i said "but thanks anyway".

don't get roped in by stuff that you are not interested in.
it is a waste of time in your precious life

Things I wish that a certain NT would never say to me again

1 I don't think you know who you are.
2 You need to live in the present.
3 It's like you can't tell the difference between fantasy and reality.
4 I think it's time that you grow up.
5 That has nothing to do with it.
6 You can be yourself, but you can't enjoy your most prized possession.
7 Whatever.
8 You're this gender, now act your gender.
9 You can hide your obsession if you try. I don't want to hide my special interest!
10 If I ever see you wearing that again, I'm going to destroy it.
11 You have a one track mind.
12 This is the worse I've ever seen you.
13 What are you crying about?
14 You don't seem to be trying to be a part of the family.
15 I think you're looking for a fight.
16 Don't go away angry.
17 Don't hang up angry.
18 It's like what you have, except your's is autism.
19 You won't be able to do most things that other people can do because you're autistic.
20 I don't expect much of you.
21 I don't know about you watching your favourite show. I'm thinking that maybe you shouldn't be watching it.
22 This has been going on between us for months and I'd like to know why that is.
23 I wish that you've never found your favourite thing.
24 What about all the times I've been there for you? After I say that some people are better trained at helping.
25 Look at me when I'm talking to you!
26 Stand up straight!
27 If your dad ever saw you wearing that, he would blow a gasket.

The opposite is no better either. One of the main reasons why I was diagnosed at 22 and my brother much earlier was that I am not a genius. I wasn't smart enough to be autistic.
The assumption that people with Asperger's Syndrome are geniuses is one of the reasons why I don't usually tell people I am autistic. I don't need another expectation I can't fulfill.

Last time I told someone I am autistic her reply simply was "BS!"
Then I told her "It's actually diagnosed".
And she said "What kind of incompetent idiot of a psychologist did you go to! Were they high?!"

"We all feel like that"

Sometimes this reassures me depending on the context, but most of the time people say this when trivialising my anxieties. Once when I was almost being forced to stay an hour later at work, even though we wasn't busy, and I felt I was going to have a panic attack because I hate walking out in public during rush hour. When I said that, my supervisor said "well none of us do but..." Yes maybe nobody is keen on being out in rush hour times but it is a bigger thing for me, just the thought of it makes me feel temporarily agoraphobic, and the feeling of being at home during rush hour is a relief to live for.

Based on the responses I’m getting, perhaps I will title my yet to be written list, 10 things Autistics want you to know.

This is the only comment I've had. I believed it too up until about a month ago.

The "look at me when you are talking to me" one is a biggie.

Also I get "you seem so intelligent, why haven't you done something with your life?" as in a career etc.

I was put down and bullied so much I just gave up and retreated from the world, that's why.

Autistic people say this too. It makes me think they must be that high functioning it's not a problem for them so how did they get diagnosed or are they just self diagnosed? No one would be saying that if it actually impacted them. It would be like me saying anxiety is just another way of thinking and seeing things. It's either denial or they are not really that impaired so they wouldn't qualify to meet the criteria.

I wish my mom would stop saying these things to me

"You were trying to be Asperger's" when talking about my middle school or high school years. I knew nothing about Asperger's in junior high, I knew the word but I didn't know how it affected people so I didn't really know what it meant except it was just a word for my brain and for me being different. I just saw myself as Beth. I just wish Mom would stop using it against me.

"Jeez Beth"
"Be logical here." (she is actually expecting me to read her mind)
I also hated the "look at me."

Ah well, if it's things I want them to know, first would be avoiding eye contact doesn't mean I'm not listening or being disrespectful and another one would be, if I'm hurt or upset I need space. I don't want to hugged. I don't want to talk about it. I just want to be left alone until I feel better/more under control. Needing space doesn't mean I don't care. It's just that I need space to be able to process and adjust to whatever has happened.

I have trouble relating to this as an NT thing because most of those who have criticized me, teased me and put me down were aspies.

Their own aggressive reaction is concealing something else actually. If they JUST doubted it they would say "I don't think that sounds accurate", or any one of millions of responses along those lines. But instead, her aggressive response probably means she has some hidden motive. Neurotypicals often have hidden ideas and second motives that they wont mention.

I thought of this one too.

The ones that bother me is:
"So what's your super-power?" (thinking that autism equals savantism)

And:
"But you look perfectly normal!"

The most bothering thing about these are that they're always said by people who mean really well, and thinks they're just being friendly or even giving a compliment. I want to be polite and explain things to them, but I'm all out of politeness and by now I can only think of rude and snappy answers. Which isn't helping anyone at all.