magz wrote:
As some of you know, I'm married, I have two children.
Now, more and more, I daydream of living alone. In a little cabin or a microapartament. To have just myself to care for and just enough posessions to do it.
I know it won't happen any soon. Maybe when I'm old. I don't want to end up in a large empty house like so many old people I know. Something tiny would do.
I guess I'm just tired of family life. Interactions. Decisions affecting not just myself. Need to think of others and for others all the time. Three other people, each of them want to spend time with me and have my attention.
I'm perfectly opposite of lonely and it's not good at all.
I have exactly the same fantasy to escape the commitments, the "noise" of what do we eat for dinner, walking the dog, clothes, the kids's appointments, mowing the lawn etc. I cannot focus on my interests, I constantly need to leave my thought patterns and I can't return with out having to spend much energy on rebuilding the patterns in my mind. Sometimes I give up, blank my mind and just vegetate in the couch watching stupid TV.
Now I spend hours on hours every week watching youtube on "offgrid stealth campers". But I love my wife and kids too much, it's just a fantasy.
03 Jun 2019, 10:21 pm
