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Therapist encouraging autistic behaviour

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Dear_one
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26 Jul 2019, 6:31 am

jngyslate wrote:
I think just trust your intuition about the correct path to take. I do know that always having to pretend to be something that you are not can be absolutely fruitless, and can really stress a person out. You should be able to just be yourself all of the time, and be happy with YOURSELF, exactly the way that you are. You don't have to change for anyone else. :heart:


We must trust "intuition" because logic is too slow for social interaction. Unfortunately, people expect IQ and EQ to go together, but we are likely enough to score double or triple differentials. I lose social confidence the more I learn and think about how to proceed. I should also point out that young women in Pasadena are almost always right, even when caught speeding. I had a lot of disasters trying to take advice that works for such people.



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26 Jul 2019, 3:02 pm

JSBACH wrote:
Hi everyone,
Today I had a meeting with my therapist.
I started consultation after a complete burnout combined with depression.

I have the impression that my therapist really understands me, and autism in general, but today, because I was doubting I clearly understood what steps she recommended to aid recovery, I asked the following question. (I don't read between lines, you best tell me things bluntly in my face)

Me:"So, if I correctly understand you, you're encouraging me to behave more abnormal/autistic"

(With abnormal, I mean: using sensory aids, stimming, rigid routines,...)

I was surprised that she replied with a YES.

We have talked before about sensitivities of mine, and she encourages using earmuffs, sunglasses, alone time, etc. to recover.

Now, I'm lucky I know how to pass quite well, but it is so tiring to pretend to be someone else / hide autism... I came home from university every day shutting down completely, not able to understand verbal language (amongst other issues).

Is this a correct approach, to be more openly autie, to aid in recovery?

I thought a therapist should make me more normal?
I know i need earmuffs/plugs in public, sunglasses for fluorescent lights, stimming and routines to stay calm and focused.
I was quite shocked to be met with a therapist suggesting to stop hiding my autism as means to conserve energy.

Is this a correct approach?
Has anyone had similar advice by a therapist?
If yes, can you specify encouraged and discouraged autistic behaviour?
(Example: discourage stimming, encourage sensory aids...)

Please enlighten me!
Yes, this is excellent advice. I wish every therapist was like this. There is a very heavy price for not being your authentic self. I know from personal experience, it has cost me dearly and nearly physically killed me and left me crippled for life. I now wear my muffs in public all the time, stim in public all the time and even have public meltdowns and when I do, I just expect the public to deal with it. Trying to suppress or hide your Autistic traits all the time can become neurologically crippling and the effects can be severe enough to eventually be deadly. So I allow myself to be as Autistic as I am. If I had Down's Syndrome or an intellectual disability no one would expect me to mask them. So why should we have to mask Autism?


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jngyslate
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30 Jul 2019, 3:48 am

Dear_one wrote:
jngyslate wrote:
I think just trust your intuition about the correct path to take. I do know that always having to pretend to be something that you are not can be absolutely fruitless, and can really stress a person out. You should be able to just be yourself all of the time, and be happy with YOURSELF, exactly the way that you are. You don't have to change for anyone else. :heart:


We must trust "intuition" because logic is too slow for social interaction. Unfortunately, people expect IQ and EQ to go together, but we are likely enough to score double or triple differentials. I lose social confidence the more I learn and think about how to proceed. I should also point out that young women in Pasadena are almost always right, even when caught speeding. I had a lot of disasters trying to take advice that works for such people.


I dont always get my way because im a "young woman", if thats what you're saying.. in my late teens, i got about 5 speeding tickets in the city of Deer Park, which is about ten minutes away from where I live now, Pasadena.



Dear_one
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30 Jul 2019, 3:55 am

jngyslate wrote:
Dear_one wrote:
jngyslate wrote:
I think just trust your intuition about the correct path to take. I do know that always having to pretend to be something that you are not can be absolutely fruitless, and can really stress a person out. You should be able to just be yourself all of the time, and be happy with YOURSELF, exactly the way that you are. You don't have to change for anyone else. :heart:


We must trust "intuition" because logic is too slow for social interaction. Unfortunately, people expect IQ and EQ to go together, but we are likely enough to score double or triple differentials. I lose social confidence the more I learn and think about how to proceed. I should also point out that young women in Pasadena are almost always right, even when caught speeding. I had a lot of disasters trying to take advice that works for such people.


I dont always get my way because im a "young woman", if thats what you're saying.. in my late teens, i got about 5 speeding tickets in the city of Deer Park, which is about ten minutes away from where I live now, Pasadena.


My condolences. According to Doonesbury, BWA's do get tickets. Aspies must become Babes With Attitude. I've read laments from women who only realized how much they had come to rely on beauty after they lost it, but people in general are inclined to be generous and helpful to young women because they are often supporting infants.



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30 Jul 2019, 4:08 am

Your therapist does the right thing.
As your abilities to "overcome autism" if needed are well developed, the goal now is to improve your mental health. To do it, you need better connection with your true needs so you can adress them.
My therapist follows a similar philosophy and she is finally someone capable of helping me.


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