My therapist doesn't think I have asperger's

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Hello. I understand you are not sure as to whether you have ASD or not, and that your present psychologist / therapist has the opinion that you do not.

The other people are correct in their advice above, in that you should wait until you should get an official evaluation from an experienced clinical psychologist who specialises in ASD.

When it comes to high and very high functioning ASD sufferers, the condition isn't immediately apparent.
Also, when it comes to ASD, the diagnosis criteria is detailed and allows a fairly amount of diversity within the criteria.
There are also other factors that tell the clinical psychologist as to whether you have ASD or not.

For example, whether you were premature, whether your birth was problematic or not, what your early childhood behaviour was like, whether you sustained any injuries to your head during early childhood.
However, I can not say how significant these factors are.

I also note when it comes to high and very high functioning autism spectrum disorder sufferers,
some of your behaviours that you exhibit that other people observe which make them think you do not have the condition can be learnt behaviours due to environment and peers. So do not always rule you out.

They also say that when it comes to woman, women are harder to evaluate as woman are better at masking their condition. So often go undetected.

I can not diagnose you. But i understand how you feel.
I waited a couple of years also to get a diagnosis.

And while i waited, i got told by several people including my doctor, who didn't know anything about the condition.
That i didn't have the condition.

I was told by one person in particular who scammed his way into a social services job, who spent his entire time
bullying people with disabilities and making inappropriate jokes about people with disabilities,
that i definitely didn't have ASD, as he considered himself an expert on the subject.

He did not have any medical qualifications, and he was telling people that load of rubbish.

I was also told by other people that because they worked as a psychiatric nurse, that they could make the diagnosis.
Again, not true. And this guy in particular worked for the local Autism Charity. He was a complete liar.

I have also met other people who worked for other minor roles in social services who also thought that they could make formal diagnosis's of ASD.

However, again their claims were unfounded.

The evaluation and diagnosis needs to be done by a clinical psychologists who specialises in ASD.
If they are not, then I am afraid they are under qualified.

That's at least how it works in the UK.
If you want to check this information out to ascertain as to whether it is good advice.
I recommend that you contact National Autism Society, who have a help line, who can help you with any questions or worries.

Hope that helps

When a began to consider that I am ASD, my non-ASD trained therapist initially said I don't have it, I'm too "warm". She talked to her ASD-trained peer and has backed off on that but still doesn't want me to label myself. A good friend who is a psychiatrist also wants me to treat my person and not label myself. That said, since it fits I'd like to use the positive aspects of the label (support, growth) and avoid the negative ones (limiting beliefs). Plus I had been masking like crazy with my therapist (trying to be "good") and have stopped. I have a secondary ASD-trained therapist and she says so many therapists don't know about ASD (particularly in the expressive majority of women, minority of men). I am fortunate that my non-ASD therapist is professional enough to do her own research in order to continue supporting me.

Sarcasm: By the way, if feeling, caring people are not part of the Spectrum, then plenty of folks on here have been misdiagnosed and a new term for that half of the spectrum will need to be created. I took lots of communication and psychology in college so pass very well, but was "outed" at work by organizational change (darn hierarchy). At home I am "outed" every day. I have yet to pursue an official diagnosis for ASD, so my current diagnosis I received at 30: "mild mood disorder".