Have you ever just been unrepentant about your ASD?

Page 2 of 2 [ 32 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

Wolfram87
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Feb 2015
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,976
Location: Sweden

25 Jun 2020, 3:44 am

If I ever get repentant about it I'll let you know, but don't hold your breath.


_________________
I'm bored out of my skull, let's play a different game. Let's pay a visit down below and cast the world in flame.


funeralxempire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Oct 2014
Age: 40
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,541
Location: Right over your left shoulder

25 Jun 2020, 6:13 pm

Have I ever not been? At least since discovering it was in play.


_________________
The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.
If you're not careful, the newspapers will have you hating the people who are being oppressed, and loving the people who are doing the oppressing. —Malcolm X
Just a reminder: under international law, an occupying power has no right of self-defense, and those who are occupied have the right and duty to liberate themselves by any means possible.


Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 26,492
Location: UK

28 Jun 2020, 2:36 pm

I just think Asperger's can be an embarrassment, and my poor mother has often been shamed by people for the emotional behaviour me and my brother (both on the spectrum) have displayed. Both my parents are NTs, but my mum has always suffered with anxiety, especially social anxiety. My dad might have had some learning delays as a kid but I can't be sure. But I think his IQ might be slightly below average. But anyway I have done some shameful things in the past due to being an Aspie.

Now that I live and work where nobody knows I have Asperger's I feel much happier, and now I feel more NT than I ever have since I was 4.


_________________
Female


MrsPeel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2017
Age: 54
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 1,915
Location: Australia

29 Jun 2020, 1:42 am

I get what the OP is saying, because it's not unknown for me to belatedly feel highly embarrassed about my AS behaviour and feel the need to apologise. In fact I think it shows a level of enlightenment, self-awareness and care for others' feelings to do so. Even when the behaviour was not intended to cause offense - I need to recognise when it has.

I agree with the OP in the sense that while I might apologise for a specific behaviour which has caused offence, there should be no need to apologise for my autism. And I should not be embarrassed to lay claim to my autistic behaviours.

The problem I find is that it's hard to draw the line between apologising for behaviour which causes offence and apologising for my autism (especially as the one is intimately related to the other). If I was unrepentant to the extent of never feeling the need to apologise and instead just saying (essentially) "hey, that's my autism, deal with it", I don't think that would help towards furthering autistic-NT relationships.

:? It's just not that easy, I think.



Dear_one
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 76
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,721
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines

29 Jun 2020, 1:55 am

Tonight, I was in a Zoom meeting and got so irritated at someone spouting bad data that I shouted them down. I checked with the moderator afterwards, and he was glad I did. He knows I'm an aspie, but thought I was acting normal enough.



MrsPeel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Oct 2017
Age: 54
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 1,915
Location: Australia

29 Jun 2020, 2:14 am

Your checking with the moderator afterwards is an example of what I mean by enlightenment.
If he had said, no, your behaviour was out of line, I imagine you might have apologised for it?



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

29 Jun 2020, 3:01 am

"Unrepentant" is a really bad choice of word, even if it's tongue-in-cheek.

He probably really means "unapologetic", or "unabashed", or ...maybe even "out of the closet"...about your autism.

The OP seems to think that you're choices would be 1) to conceal your ASD, or (2) reveal it, but be humble and apologetic about it, or (3) just wave your geek flag high and just be a flaming autistic and not apologize.

The trouble is that for many its not that simple. My life was affected by ASD all of my life, but I didnt know that I was ASD until well into middle age. So I didnt know what to apologize for (or to "repent" for) until very recently.



Pepe
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Jun 2013
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 26,635
Location: Australia

29 Jun 2020, 3:11 am

Jayo wrote:


We don't have "psychiatric disorders. "
We have a syndrome.

Quote:
I'm on the autistic spectrum, but at the more high-functioning end - many people are these days, it's not a big deal
.
I've been saying this for many years.
If NTs have a problem with this also, frack 'em. :ninja:

Quote:
The truth is that I'm an honest, decent, hardworking guy with a great sense of humour and I'm very supportive with the people who treat me right.

No!
*I'm* Sparticus! :mrgreen:

Quote:
Hopefully, that will get them to relent, and realize they're the ones being obtuse...

I don't give a "Cracker" anymore. 8)



Pepe
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Jun 2013
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 26,635
Location: Australia

29 Jun 2020, 3:19 am

Joe90 wrote:
I just think Asperger's can be an embarrassment, and my poor mother has often been shamed by people for the emotional behaviour me and my brother (both on the spectrum) have displayed. Both my parents are NTs, but my mum has always suffered with anxiety, especially social anxiety. My dad might have had some learning delays as a kid but I can't be sure. But I think his IQ might be slightly below average. But anyway I have done some shameful things in the past due to being an Aspie.


24ct gold autistic honesty.
I'm proud of you.
Here, have an achievement star: :star: :wink:



Pepe
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Jun 2013
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 26,635
Location: Australia

29 Jun 2020, 3:24 am

Fnord wrote:
Jayo wrote:
Have you ever just been unrepentant about your ASD?
It is no more necessary to repent having an ASD than it is to repent having color-blindness.

a. People need to repent from "Sin".

b. Autism Spectrum Disorders are not "Sins".

: : People do not need to repent from Autism Spectrum Disorders.

:roll: Of all the questions to ask...


Once again, Watson,
You see but you don't observe.
We, having to "repent", is in the mindest of the ratbags, err, I mean ignorant NTs. 8)



Pepe
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Jun 2013
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 26,635
Location: Australia

29 Jun 2020, 3:27 am

Jayo wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Jayo wrote:
Have you ever just been unrepentant about your ASD?
It is no more necessary to repent having an ASD than it is to repent having color-blindness.

a. People need to repent from "Sin".

b. Autism Spectrum Disorders are not "Sins".

: : People do not need to repent from Autism Spectrum Disorders.

:roll: Of all the questions to ask...


Ummm...I dunnoooo...in a couple of perverse NT situations in the past, you'd have thought that they were trying to "exorcise" me... they regarded my (more pronounced at the time) ASD behaviours as an abomination of some sort...


Some in this thread didn't get it.
*I*, Sparticus, did. 8)



naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

29 Jun 2020, 7:18 am

According to the Pope you have to recite 14 "hail Marries", and then...you have to promise never to be autistic again!

In the Catholic Church you at least get to confess your autism in private to your priest.

If you're Protestant, or Jewish, you just hafta deal with your guilt about committing autism on your own.



Dear_one
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 76
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,721
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines

29 Jun 2020, 8:58 am

MrsPeel wrote:
Your checking with the moderator afterwards is an example of what I mean by enlightenment.
If he had said, no, your behaviour was out of line, I imagine you might have apologised for it?


I wrote that I hoped I had not earned a banishment, but if I had, I would have wanted to look for a more logical forum anyway. I apologize for bad manners, but never for ASD or speaking the truth.



SharonB
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jul 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,747

29 Jun 2020, 9:51 am

SSL ate my response. (And my copy buffer expired.)

In short, what comes to mind for me is when I have been shamed and ashamed related to my differences and would like to respond without the shame --- and I fantasize about being "unrepentant".

It seems I was either born or socialized to be anti-assertive, so it's been interesting exploring assertiveness which is adding a dash of "unrepentant" if you will. If I am wrong, I have no problem saying "sorry", but when it's a matter of difference, I have to be very careful I am not wrongfully wronged (which happens too often --- I'm a sitting duck that way it seems. I'm working on a more confident quack to start).



Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,975
Location: Outter Quadrant

29 Jun 2020, 10:03 am

Autism as a normal life feels most likely no different than anyone considering their life as normal .
If could perceive the need for repentance than I might consider it . But. I am what I am .
To quote. Very famous cartoon character .
Often periodically I think the need for NTs to be repentant .


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are


Dear_one
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 76
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,721
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines

29 Jun 2020, 2:12 pm

^^2 I'm Canadian, so "sorry" comes very easily. :-) We can say that we are sorry about a traffic accident and not be in any legal trouble over having said we caused it.