One thing that doesn't seem to fit...

Post Reply New Topic

I generally always prefer being on my own to being with other people, but if I go for a really long time without social interaction, I start to get depressed.

Once I make friends, I get used to their familiarity and like them around. They still have to adhere to my rules on routines though, lol. All of my friends know that if they come over around dinner time, they will be eating by 6:00 at the latest, but 5:30 is preferred. They know that I have to check my e-mail every time I pass the computer, etc.

I don't have many people who come over at all, but with my once a year visit from them, I am pretty set. I enjoy the company once they are actually there... I always feel that darn detachment however no matter what, so it does not necessarily bother me when they are not around either.

I like socializing, but usually only on my own terms. I'm uncomfortable in large groups, and with people I don't particularly know well. Once I get to know someone, it can get pretty easy, and I enjoy it. I was commenting to my wife last night, when we went out to dinner with a friend, that now I know that friend better, it's no longer painful to keep eye contact with her. Still not easy, but it's not uncomfortable in the same way it would be with a stranger (and, with my wife, it can even be pleasant on occasion to keep eye contact with her, the only person I think that's ever been the case with).
I think that because those with AS find socialization difficult, many just get turned off by it, and would rather not deal with the stress. That's understandable, and certainly how I was for a lot of my teen years, but often what is widespread discomfort is misinterpreted as a lack of desire to socialize, probably even by those who feel it. I have to say, I also do enjoy spending long periods alone though.