Is watching youself in the mirror a common aspie trait?

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I tend 2 look at da mirror quite a lot cos dats where i tend 2 talk 2 myself but i also pose at da same tym such as touchin my hair.

He doesn't do it at home too much. we have a full length mirror in our bedroom that he will do the same thing with. I think he likes looking at his body. I don't know really.

Several possibilities come to my mind.

It may be that he's simply fascinated by the sight of a full-sized copy of himself mimicking everything he does.

Or, this may be his first uniform, and that intrigues him.

If he is actively trying to understand his place in the world, the way some aspies do, he may be amazed at the sight of himself sharing space with all those other people dressed just like him, and may be expending a lot of brain power analyzing all the relationships, similarities and differences.

A dramatic change in perspective (like a room full of mirrors) can make a sudden, huge difference in how we try to understand something that’s been very puzzling to us.

I wouldn't worry too much about stopping him. He is probably just working it all out.

You might point out to him that he needs to pay enough attention to the other kids in class so that he doesn’t get punched in the side of the head while sparring, though

Personally, I hate seeing myself in mirrors. It makes my brain hurt and makes me cross.

My wife does not understand the fascination that I have with looking in the mirror. I can't really explain the reason I look in the mirror, I just have this need to stare at it.

It is not always me looking at myself, although I certainly do that, I also like to look at things from a different perspective through the mirror. I even will watch TV in the mirror.

I also enjoy watching tv and the world upside down.


The comments about us looking at ourselves to see our facial expressions while we talk does sound right. I have never thought of it in those terms, but when I look back in my minds eye, I can see that this appears to be what I am doing.

I have a mirror near my computer and sometimes like to jump up and walk around the room/house, usually ending up staring myself in it. I nearly always start doing various gestures (though usually when I feel like I'm doing something, I notice very little in the mirror. Possibly the reason why my face is often called emotionless. On the other hand, they can also be "over the top"), moves, things. Naturally I avoid eye-contact, but enjoy examining my own. Eyes have somekind of a power to me and I guess it fascinates to see the person in the mirror also having this, along with seeing a completely different world in there. I'm usually also very unconscious of my body and especially the face so it's always an interesting experience.

It feels like studying.

Last edited by Keoren on 20 Nov 2007, 5:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Im mega hot so I can't stop staring at myself in the mirror, its like staring into the sun, except I don't go blind.

Exactly!

I used to take TKD lessons too, and I had a hard time with doing things in time with everyone else, or imitating their movements. It was only when I looked in the mirrors that I could really get a hang of what I was doing and how I was doing it.

And when he's speaking: I've found that when I speak to people, and I'm trying to get an idea across, too much of my brainpower is being used, like an overload, so I end up not being able to think, and not being able to communicate. It seems like an either-or proposition. Either I can form an idea, or I can make someone understand.

An interesting thing I found is that the right brain controlls speech, but the left brain controlls hearing. AS and nonverbal learning disability both involve a deficit in our two hemispheres communicating.

So, what that means is that talking to yourself and watching yourself as you speak means that your two hemispheres are talking to each other! The reason that he can't look people in the eye when he speaks is that his brain is too busy making sure his intuitive processes (right brain) pass the muster of his right brain (analytical side). This is why so many of us who write so well are such poor speakers - we are focusing on others when we should be focusing on ourselves.

Sir Isaac Newton would give lectures on his ideas, and even if nobody came to hear them, he would still give the lecture.

It seems like someone is making your son feel ashamed about looking in the mirror; one thing AS people HATE is unjust scrutiny. It just so invasive and destructive to us. If you talk with him and help him to know that his behaviours are not weird or sick or selfish, that they all happen for a reason.

One thing about your list - I think that it is a good idea in theory. However, don't keep this a secret from him, or treat him like you are tallying up his flaws. Again, scrutiny of our interior world is the most painful thing we can go through. This is what causes reactive social shutdowns. Make sure that you engage him in this process, and that this is not so that "we can find out what's wrong and weird about you." I'm not saying that that is your INTENT, don't get me wrong! It's just that we have a knack for immediately interpreting things as OUR FAULT or BAD if someone notices what we do.

These things that he does all help him grow and understand the world he lives in. Make sure that he knows that while not everyone does this, and it IS unusual, it is an entirely good thing. He will be scrutinized for the rest of his life, and people will try to shame him and hurt him for these behaviours, and the best thing you can do right now is to help him internalize that his self-worth does not depend on the feedback of others.

Help him to discover MORE of these "weird" behaviours and encourage them. I know you must have a feeling of frustration and "aaaah what do I do???" going on, and that's because you love your kid. I'm glad you take such an interest in his well-being.

I think you may be making a mountain out of a molehill.
A big part of martial arts is correct form, which could explain why he looks at himself a lot during class. Maybe he just wants to make sure his knee is bent at the right angle, etc.
As for making faces, what little boy doesn't like to make faces at himself in mirrors?

You also said this:
"He makes normal expressions when he's talking to people directly."
This is a pretty big sign that he does NOT have Asperger's. He talks to people directly, while making appropriate facial expressions? Wish I could do that.

Yeah I do it a lot too. Really in any reflective surfaces. People must think I'm a narcissist. It's really not that at all. I'm just fascinated by mirror images. I like to make funny faces too.

When I was a little girl and teenager, I would position the side medicine cabinet mirror to where it reflected in the large mirror over the sink, so it looked like a thousand mirrors were all lined up going on for eternity. Anyone here old enough to remember those medicine cabinets with a mirror and a place to slip used up razors into a slot inside?

I used to look at the ostensibly infinite reflection of mirrors and also my own reflection in there. There were sooo many of ME. LOL I could sit on the cabinet and stare into the mirrors for a very long time... I was never bored with it.

Generally speaking, I have always had a preoccupation of looking at myself in the mirror. Well, I used to... not so much since I've become obese in the last 5 years. Now I try not to look. I think people used to think I was vain but actually I've always been too critical about my looks.

If you've never looked into two mirrors at once, you should try it sometime. You can even do it with two handmirrors. Have the mirrors face each other a bit and look into one of them. It looks like an Allison in Wonderland in there.

Yep, we had one of those cabinets!

I used to do that all the time, too. (reposition the mirrors so I could see different angles.) Ah, I miss those mirrors.

I do it a lot... I'm quite vain.

He won't make eye contact. I didn't want to believe that he could have Asperger's because he didn't have all of the social symptoms. I keep being told that he is mild at best. But he has routines that if they are broken he falls apart. He is a creature of habit. I thought a lot of things that he did was normal for an 8 year old boy. But....what is normal for him isn't normal for other kids.


The TKD thing is that he watches himself while he's in motion. He will run into a wall (or fist) before he will stop looking at himself. I don't think it's a HUGE deal but it is very distracting for everyone. I'm kind of with the other guy when he said that he's probably looking at the uniform.

Because....at home he won't look in his bathroom mirror for anything. Brushing his hair (when he does), his teeth and so on.

I have one of those cabinets, though I usually leave the door open so that it covers up the mirror. I don't tend to enjoy looking in the mirror

My house has cabinets with mirrors on the outside surface, so there's always a pocket of infinite space whenever you look at it just right. It's pretty awesome.

I look at myself in the mirror often when I'm in the bathroom, usually just to test out facial expressions or sometimes just to grin at myself and say hey. Yesterday, for example, I found out that when I put on my "confused" look it comes off extremely angry. My brows just furrow inwards and down so that half my eyes are blocked out. I try to make a point of not looking at my reflection in public, though, because I don't know what people might think.

Flakey has always called me a canary.
I DO have a fixation with looking at myself in the mirror. I keep a little box with a mirror inside on the bar where I work so that I can occasionally check up on myself. I used to have a little convex reflector mirror perched nearby for easy access.
I can connect with myself better than I connect with others around me. It sorta grounds me.
I actually get kinda uncomfortable without easy access to a mirror...and sometimes I would rather talk to my reflection than to the person I am talking to.

When I was younger and a tad more OCD, one of my rituals involved going to the bathroom just to stare at myself in the mirror.

My dad is absolutely obsessed with mirrors, and has them everywhere...