Were you scapegoated by your family due to AS?

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My mum got real friendly when my dad started going on constant trips for work and even more so when my sister moved out of home. Dad didn't settle until his first grandkids were born but now he's great.

Same. And I'm now doing alot better than my normal brother and sister so suddenly awful social skills and strange interests doesn't seem so bad. Mum even told me that Dad sometimes brags to people about how his kid is in engineering school.

I was scapegoated somewhat, but AS cannot independently explain it. My reasoning here is that one thing I was blamed for was disrupting family eating occasions with my 'food issues'. I was notorious within the family and constantly criticised for my 'fussiness' in eating, while my cousin (who had identical food issues) was catered to and excused. Whenever any of us cousins would criticise her fussiness we all got in trouble with the same adults that harped constantly at me for the same exact thing.

If it were AS causing the scapegoating, I expect my cousin would have been equally afflicted with criticism instead of catered to and protected. In fact my cousin shared (with me) a number of the traits that our family aimed a barrage of criticisms at me about, but was supportive of in the case of my cousin.

pandd, what do you think is the cause for the different treatment of you and your cousin?

Yep, definitely. My father, after years of doing absolutely nothing for me, not even paying child support, finally let me live with him when I was twenty years old. Predictively, that lasted only five months after he blamed me for the car accident and his drug relapse that happened while I was with him.

He said my presence in his household was causing god to withhold blessings from his family since I went to a mainstream church instead of being a Jehovah's Witness like they were. He kicked me out supposedly to "save" his family from the "evil" that was me.

I had caused him no trouble at all and did nothing but go to school, work and church but that didn't change is opinion of me. He would rather listen to what the Watchtower folks said about me than what he saw with his own eyes.

Absolutely. My brother left the house as soon as he could, and my sister can do no wrong, so I was left to be the f**kup.