What things have you said wrong?

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you know the problem with a 18 year old guy dating a 17 year old girl, if caught the guy could go to jail and be put on the sex offender list, which was probably the reason why he declined your offer.

These posts made me remember another incident. My family friend (I've known since Kindergarden but she's actually my older sister's friend) had a new boyfriend. I said hey buddy you better not be beating her (jokingly) My sister said I shouldn't say that so I went off to my room. I then got reprimanded WHY DID YOU SAY THAT?! !! !! !

I tend to mumble alot.

I remember when I was 15, I said I still slept with my parents.
When I was 18, I'd see kids hugging each other on the bus on the way to track meets and I'd tell them they were coupling.
I remember saying at a family reunion these people were doing love making because they were kissing. Mother got mad at me.


The first two, kids and teachers knew what I exactly meant.




I remember when I was 8 I had been hearing this sentence a lot in school. "It was so funny I forgot to laugh." So one day I decided I wanted to say it, so I say it to my brother when he falls off the swing on our swingset. Mike started crying and Mom told me to apologize. I had learned that was a bad phrase. I never used it again, only at school since it was allowed. Of course the phrase never made sense. If you think something is funny, laugh if you forgot to, but why say it? Maybe it's sarcasm.

Some teachers introduced me to a new student teacher fresh out of teachrs collage, maybe twenty five or so years old. Anyway, they introduced me by his first name.

Now, in my head I though 'I can't call you by your first name because you are older then me. I should adress him as Mr. ____'

What I actually said was 'I can't call you by your first name because you are old.'

After one of the teachers kiddingly put me in a headlock I exspalianed that I was Autistic and what I meant to say.

There was another time when I was in a line up to get food at a festival and the man in front of me (Who I did not know) nocked over a large sign.

He promptly said to no one in particular: 'I just keep nocking things over'.

To which I should have said: Nothing.

What I did say: 'It wouldn't be the first time'.

To which he turned to me and said: 'I don't even know you'.

And I should have said: Nothing.

What I did say: 'Well, if you nocked over the sign, it is safe to assume that you have nocked over other things'.

To which he said: Nothing.

I didn't really realise that this was bad until a few minutes later.

I have "foot in mouth" disease regularly.

Well, it's not easy to avoid hearing about something like 9/11. See my response in the other thread you started. I don't judge you harshly for laughing. I just don't understand it. It's Soti-what's-his-face whom I judged harshly. There's some things people shouldn't tell me, either, especially if it's not supposed to be common knowledge, because chances are sooner or later I'm going to repeat it to someone else without thinking.



Well, death is a touchy subject with people. Best to avoid commenting on it. One aspect of Aspie-ism is that we don't joke very well. What we find funny may not necessarily be the case with other people, even other Aspie. One thing I learned really quick when I first arrived here was that yes, other Aspies think like me, but they don't hold the same world-view or find the same things funny that I do. There's nothing wrong with that, but like you and others alluded to here, I tend to step on language bombs all the time and they usually blow up in my face. People say things that offend me all the time, but if they TALK to me about it, even if we still disagree, I'm ALWAYS willing to say that fine, we disagree, but we can still get along and still agree on other things. Problem with NTs seems to be that once you mess up and say the wrong thing around them, they hold it against you for life. They think that what you say defines you and that there can't possiby be any underlying reason you might have said something that was offensive (which nine times out of ten wasn't meant to be offensive in the first place). Like what you said to your grandmother - I've said similar things to my own mother and to my husband. They know me, so sooner or later they forgive me, but I still don't understand why what I said was wrong in the first place.

Usually what gets me in trouble is stating the obvious (which NTs hate, trust me) or stating a fact that people really don't want pointed out. For instance, the other day, for the first time in a long while, coworkers invited me to go to a restaurant with them for lunch. I got through most of it okay until the conversation turned to a Mexico-themed mall going up in the area. Bear in mind, I'm in the Southeastern U.S. and up until about 5 years ago, there were very few Hispanic people here. After Hurricane Katrina, they began moving here by the thousands. I made the comment about how I'd noticed that there are a lot more Mexican and Cuban people here than there used to be, especially at the swap meet, where nearly every vendor there was Hispanic. I added that when I stopped by there, I felt like I was back home in Arizona again. It was a simple observation, but all of a sudden everyone at the table went quiet. I didn't understand why. Finally, just to break the awkward silence, I said, "I don't have a problem with Hispanic people, it's just that I noticed there seems to be a lot more around here than there used to be." What my coworkers didn't know was that I am part Hispanic and Native American, even though I 'look' white. I was like, "Yay, there's a lot of Hispanics here now," and I couldn't figure out why everyone went quiet. They were quiet toward me for the rest of the day.

Later, I asked a friend (more of an acquaintance, but a lady I could actually talk to) about what I'd said and if she could tell me what it was that I said was wrong. She replied, "The thing that was wrong is that you were pointing out the number of Hispanics is growing in the area. You have to remember who you were talking to - those women are old Southern hens who are mistrustful of strangers. Hispanics are thought of as 'interlopers' here and when you reminded them of that, you put a damper on their mood." I didn't understand this and didn't understand why they don't like Hispanics. I'd initially taken it as if they'd been offended because I'd 'noticed' Hispanics when I technically shouldn't be noticing race at all (it's not very P.C.). But the problem was the opposite. Apparently, down here in the Ol' South, a lot of people think all Hispanics are illegal aliens, which I think is complete bullsh!t. I'd touched a nerve, but not the one I initially thought I did. Needless to say, I won't be going to lunch with the 'gals' anymore, even if they asked me to, ever again.

The age depends on what state you live in.

Hey Rainstorm 5 I had an incident in class like what you described. One day the teacher showed a weird face and said that this releases endorphins much like an Orgasm would. During another lesson a student had there 6/7 year old child there. The teacher repeated the face and left out Orgasm and just said released endorphins and I mentioned the word Orgasm. Everyone stared at me!! ! I was so embarrassed. Obviously what I said was wrong but I'm not into sex terms etc.

just the other week i made an inappropriate remark to a colleague about another colleagues absence due to the death of a parent. i tried to turn the situation around but i think it was too late

I remember when my mother and I were in England, we went to the Kensington Palace and we were outside after we were finished with out tour. We see this lady who works there and Mom asks her who lives in those apartments. The lady says "Diane's family."
I ask a stupid question since I didn't understand royalty because we don't have it here duh.
I asked "How much rent do they pay?"
The lady says "Are you deaf, they're royal they're British."
I ask how much do they pay for their utilities and she says they pay nothing and all the taxes pays for their living.
I say "Wow it's like paying for the welfare."
The lady's mouth opens.
She deserved that comment anyway for being rude to me with her attitude. Did she not know I was an American?

I don't think I have anything like that recently, but I am worried that being openly honest all the time is driving people away.

Rainstorm, that's exactly the kind of thing that gets me outcast. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed the read tremendously.

I'm fascinated at how NTs have this inborn device in them that makes them grasp what is ok to say to these people they're talking to right now and what isn't, without having to stop to think about it. It's what we aspies lack, and yours is a perfect example of what I mean that it's not about gaining more social skills - that's utter waste of resources (time, money, energy).

I would've misunderstood, just like you, that I had made some PC transgression, when in fact the problem was the opposite. We're so clueless about these things that even when we want to learn from our mistakes, we learn the wrong lesson.

And last, I'm an expert at mentioning precisely the things that people fear hearing, when we're supposed to be having a good time together. I'm a party-ruiner in this sense. Nobody ever believed me that I don't do it on purpose.

I put my foot in my mouth a lot, my latest faux pas was at work (a preschool kitchen) and my coworkers and I were talking politics and the subject of Bill Clinton and Monica-gate came up and I said "look at all the crap Bush is doing and he's not getting impeached while Clinton got impeached for lying about a blowjob..."

This happened four years ago:



I remember I was chatting to one of my aspie friends online and we were talking about something. He was talking about his weight. I don't really remember what he was saying but anyways from what he was describing, it made me wonder if he was fat so I asked him "Are you fat?"
He signed off. I thought he had a internet connection problem or got cut off or maybe he had a power outage. Well about a few weeks later, I find out he blocked me because he told me so in a yahoo group when he said I was insensitive and all when I made a post about me having problems with one of my other online friends who was harassing me through IM.
I was very hurt because we had been friends for a year and I couldn't believe he did that to me and after all, aren't aspies honest and say what's on their mind? We don't mean to be hurtful so why would he treat me like I was an NT or something. I never told him that part when he decided to crawl back to me and he apologized about his behavior and I apologized about mine.

I was 16 as well and the morning it happened on the way to school a lot of the boys were talking about how cool was that, and did you see how it exploded, and so on. I thought it was a new video game that they were all talking about (they were all friends) and asked "what video game are you talking about?" Turned out they were talking about the Twin Towers. Oops.