Worst day of my life.

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Well, the comment was a bit seedy for a high school math class. I don't think your teacher meant to imply you're a bad or immature person, merely that that comment was inappropriate, and you might want to be more careful about it in the future. So really, don't take it so bad (since no good will come of that), but try to learn the lesson your teacher intended to teach.

I had so many similar situations in my school days. I once told my shop teacher that I was "scared s**tless" of the welding equipment (which I was), and ended up in the hallway counting bricks in the wall as punishment. Once I even recited a poem about penis size to my biology teacher after class, from one of those "straight facts about growing up" type books I was obsessed with at the time. I swear I collected every mistakes and social blunder in the back of my mind growing up, and punished myself horribly for them for years after. It wasn't until many years later that I realized... I wasn't such a bad person. I was just socially naive, and prone to exagerating my faults!

So you're not alone. Everyone makes mistakes here and there. But beating yourself up about them is a BAD HABIT to get into, and it accomplishes nothing except making you feel worse! Learn to be more forgiving of yourself, and learn your lessons... but then try to move on. It's a hard habit to change, but you'll feel much better once you do.

^_^

I've been beating myself up constantly for every embarrassing thing I've ever done. That is the thing that usually triggers my depression.

I've always had low self esteem, and everytime I do something stupid, I would keep thinking to myself "Omg, people must think I'm weird now" and I would shut down.

Yeah, Bush just made some mistakes, and Hurricane Katrina just caused some unpleasant weather!

Let's see: no new attacks after 9/11, low 5% unemployment, no corruption scandals. He may have took some risks on easy mortgages and Iran may have been a better target than Iraq, but at the end of the day he did more good than harm.

*train is derailed* all conspiracy theories please board now.

My head just exploded.

I couldn't access my cat site yesterday, and it made me feel bad. Luckily, I got in today, and things were a lot better.

I hope that things are better for you today also.

Well he might have done the right thing attacking Afghanistan after 9/11, but almost any U.S. president would have. I would feel much more secure if he had captured or killed Osama bin Laden, but, of course he hasn't. That's largely because he got distracted by Iraq. I supported the Iraq War at first but now that I see that WMD claim was false, I cannot help but think that the lives and money thrown away on that disaster were wasted. I don't know if he lied but he clearly dismissed facts that didn't fit his theory. I know that Clinton and Lieberman also believed the WMD B.S. so I have no doubt that a Gore administration would have made the same stupid mistake. That still doesn't make it any less of a stupid mistake.


That's probably an underestimate since workers too discouraged to look for a job drop out of the unemployment figures. Even if it's not, we've had inflation not seen since the Carter years, and no one would argue that the economy of the past couple of years is good. Besides Clinton had a good economy, but not because of his policies, but because he was lucky. To what extent the Bush economy has been good, can you say any different? Sure he gave us a puny tax cut, which is better than adding to our already enormous tax burden, but he and the Republican congress when they were in power raised spending more than the Democrats ever did. And that's true even if you only count non-defense spending.


OK, now I know you're joking! Your first two statements were legitimate opinions but that's just ridiculous. How about Scooter Libby? How about the Alberto Gonzales federal attorney firing scandal. Those two I just came up with off the top of my head. Given time, I'm sure I could come up with more.


Care to give an example of how?

Last edited by archdude on 20 May 2008, 8:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Here's my process, which has worked well for me over time:
1. Realize that I'm beating myself up.
2. Take a time out and catch my breath. Focus and clear my mind.
3. Remind myself that it was a silly mistake.
4. Forgive myself the same way I'd forgive anyone else.
5. Pause to make sure I'm not finding lame excuses to dwell on a silly mistake.
6. Commit myself to remember the lesson, not the mistake.
7. Deliberately chuckle out loud to change my mood.
8. Find something enjoyable to distract myself.

It's hard to do at first, and you can't be cynical or lazy about it. But I've found it is a very effective way to deal with self-abuse, and after years, it's become second-nature.

Once my mood starts falling, it's very hard to stop.

Whenever my mood abruptly changes from depressed to happy, I feel like I'm 'cheating' myself and I start rocking back and forth or hand flapping. Then I would feel the urge to punch something or bang my head against something. Is this considered stimming?

It happened once already, and when people asked why I was so fidgetly, I said sugar rush.

yay the train is back on track ^^

I'm pretty sure it is... stimming I mean...

It's VERY hard to stop. I never said it was easy. But if you keep at it, and don't get discouraged, you can be more aware of your reaction to these situations, and potentially break the cycle. If you convince yourself that it's a lost cause... that's REALLY cheating yourself.

just never give up coz im sure he didint meaned it like that

Today, the teacher gave us back our 3 day tests. He curved it under the combined average of the highest score of the males and females. He curves every test he gives us since no one has ever gotten a 100 on his tests without a curve. People call him the inventor of calculus. That's how tough he is.

Before He passed out the tests, someone asked him who he curved the scores under. He looked through the stack of tests he had in his hand, and said it was me. That meant I got a 100, which really surprised me since I always get 60-70s on his tests. After he said my name, he said "I still hate you." I instinctively blurted out "I hate you too."

A few minutes later, he said "Oops, I didn't curve it under you." When I heard that, my heart sank. That meant I didn't get a hundred. He gave me the test, and it was a 97.

I looked through the test and started beating myself up again. For one question, I did the work and got the correct answer, but forgot to circle an answer choice. For another question, I did the work and got the correct answer, but circled a different answer choice. I recalculated my score to see what I would've gotten if I hadn't been such an idiot, and it was a hundred.

I basically walked home feeling mad and a bit depressed. At least it wasn't as worse as yesterday.

You have unreasonably high standards for yourself. That's not necessarily good. You didn't give yourself proper credit for all the stuff you did right, which will kill your motivation over time. And you're getting too wrapped up in feeling terrible about not doing PERFECT... when you should be focusing on analyzing the mistakes themselves so you improve. The best students aren't the ones who torture themselves for every mistake - they're the ones who use their mistakes to find opportunities for improvement, and don't get distracted by emotions.

So yeah, getting depressed over tiny errors doesn't make you a better person or a better student. If anything, these emotional distractions might be holding you BACK from getting better scores! Geez! Take it easy on yourself.

Well, first I agree with what Tharn said. A 97 is a good score and you should be proud of yourself for that. If you've gotten 60-70s in the past that is remarkable improvement and it shouldn't be as hard to go from 97 to 100 as it was to go from 70 to 97. Even if you do get 100 though just staying in the 90s will be great.

Second, after hearing the teacher say he hates you, I am more convinced than ever that while he may be good at his subject matter, he is a rotten teacher and an even worse human being. Maybe I'm missing something, had you said something to provoke him just before that? If so, then maybe he could be forgiven for losing his temper. But it sounds like this was unprovoked and completely unjustified. You should try not to let what this tool says bother you. I know, easier said than done, but try to remember that he must really be a pathetic little man inside if he thinks he has to act this way.