Do people really learn great social skills in public school?

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I was in public school from 5th grade to 10th. I had to leave or I would have had to drop out. The stress was way to much.

I ended up being hospital home bound. It is a program for kids that cant go to school because of a medical reson. I quilifyed because of my mentel helth.

I had a teacher from shcool came to my house everyday for 2 hours . He would give me my work and I would do the assignments during the day and give them back the next day.

I graduated because I was being home schooled. I had more time to do my work so my grades went way up to honer roll.

And I was in such a low stress enviroment I had time to socalise and that is how I learned my social skills.

so I think home schooling is better, or at least it was for me.

as for "clicks" i believe you mean "cliques" and they dont always happen and theyre not at every school. large schools like the school i go to doesnt have any discernable cliques to be had, but thats probably because there were like, 2700 students last year. there are so many people that students generally stop caring about whos who and whats doing what with the exception of their own inner friend circle, which is different from the popular definition of a clique. when you walk in to the high school in the morning, you probably would notice alot of the kids wearing the darker colors are in one area, and the other kids with the sagging pants are in another section, but neither section will ostracize anyone for being weird : you often see people going from group to group to catch up with friends. no one considers any groups to have any walls, or to barr anyone from merely speaking or becoming friends with anyone.

i dont remember having clique problems in middle school either, though i dont really remember a whole lot from middle school. the closest thing to that kind of behavior i remember was 8th graders calling 6th graders 'kids' which, well, is kind of true because 6th graders were anywhere from age 10 to age 12. and no one made a big deal about the age gap either. this problem is nonexistant at my school, except with the occasional trash-talk about freshman walking slowly in hallways (with 2700 students, its quite an issue to be sure, but its not just freshman doing it) but no one says anything to the freshman in question.

maybe ive just landed in with a good crowd? maybe ive made friends with rather open-minded people who dont care for social groupings?

The people who post mean things on YouTube are the same people who bulled us in school. They wrote mean things about this kid because they're all dumb and they know it and they're jealous of this kid. That's why they bullied some of us in school: we were smart, they were dumb, they were jealous, so we got bullied. Another part of it is because of an apparent lack of social skills. Bully is jealous, he sees that the person he's jealous of doesn't have very good social skills, so he uses that to make the person he's jealous of look stupid. It's what happens all the time, especially with younger kids.

I didn't learn social skills in public school. What I learned about socializing in public school is that people will pick on you and sometimes you won't be able to leave; you'll just have to suck it up and take it, and no one will do anything about it. That's just the way it is in public school. You get an assigned seat and aren't allowed to leave that seat. If you're seated next to a bully, you're screwed. I'm homeschooling my son when he gets older. I don't care if people will tell me that he won't learn any social skills. I don't want him to suffer the way I did in public schools for thirteen years. I didn't get a good education and I got picked on and bullied for years. It's just not worth it, IMO.

I think it had the opposite effect on me, after all the problems I had in school I became more withdrawn socially.

Also dropped out at 16, went back for my GED a few years later. I loved learning...just hated being in stuffed in a classroom with 20 other kids all day, it was a sensory he$$.

One word: Nope.

I've been through 12 years of school. And it has resulted slim to none in my social skills. My parents might as well of put me in the attic for 12 years to learn. I think you either got it or you dont. People that are fortunate enough to be born NT are going to naturally learn much faster than people with disorders or disabilities.

I went to public school and my social skills have always been below the age level. The teachers figured I would catch up in them if I were around my peers and spend time with them because that's what they wrote in my IEP when I was 8. But I never caught up in my social skills or learned them all on my own. I had to be told. I also copied other kids' behavior and it get me into trouble but I still copied them because I was trying to be normal.

From what I've seen and heard of public school, and what I've experienced of private school (which is far from being a tolerant, understanding utopia, believe you me), it seems people are learning what are technically "social skills," but all the wrong kinds. As other posters have mentioned, what you learn in school is how to deal with difficult people - disrespectful people who do things that are out of line and foist all the work on you at the worst times and take advantage of your weak points wherever they see them. This is framing the problem all wrong. The point SHOULDN'T be to teach nice kids who do their work, learn the material and don't go out of their way to bother anyone, albeit maybe those who are socially naive and without a sense of what's the norm, to suck it up and deal with it - it should be to take those difficult people and teach THEM hard work, compassion, tolerance and honesty so they will become decent individuals instead of the future drains on society. Yes, there will still be difficult people for a variety of reasons. However, by making it seem like WE have to learn to deal with THEM as they are rather than that THEY should have to learn to be at least civil towards US, people are tacitly endorsing bad behavior as being normal and even acceptable, which it shouldn't be.

I didn't learn how to get along with kids when I was in school. I did want to get along with the kids around me. I tried to be friends with them, talk to them. I was a very friendly child. So friendly and in dire need of being accepted by my peers probably more so than most, even though I do not want to be presumptuous.

Everytime I tried I got into trouble. The teachers wanted me to be quiet never talk, just sit there like a zombie which is something that no one else did. Most of the other kids were talkative. I got the impression I got in trouble for talking more than they did. I didn't think that was fair and resented being singled out.

I didn't bother trying to talk to any of the teachers, just other kids. The teachers really scared me, especially after grade school. Seventh grade was when I stopped talking to teachers. I think I barely spoke to any of 'em. I don't know how common an experience this is but I had a genuine phobia concerning my teachers and stayed very distant and never spoke to any of them. It is so strange now that I think about it but at the time I didn't question that it was not normal to never talk to your teachers.

A couple of times neighbor kids got in trouble at school for harrassing me. It wasn't my doing, someone else told on them. I was too afraid to ever tell on anyone and thought for sure one of them would kill me over it. To my disbelief neither one of them did. I also thought there would be a grudge but neither one of held it against me, at least not to my face.

I had this fear of ever talking about this sort of thing because it always meant bad news for me later even though the principal advised me to tell them what was going on. I never did though.

So, I would say I didn't learn how to socialize at school. I learned that no one was on my side I couldn't trust anyone, talk to anyone. Making friends was not going to be a part of my reality. Harrassment was a daily ritual that lasted most of the school day and sent me into meltdowns at home. It was just one big nightmare one I couldn't escape no matter how I tried to convince my mom that I needed a change.

I had this fear of that change though and what it would mean for me. I had been threatened all my life with certain possibilities and this terrified me. I was raised in an atmosphere of "grey" never really fitting in anywhere, too smart to be stupid, too stupid to be smart. Too different to fit in but not different enough.

I had other issues as well, medical ones. You could say my childhood was pretty much a nightmare and what you are seeing now is a genuine miracle.

I learned that I was no social butterfly.