Self-Injury

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What is a meltdown?

Lots of topics started on that. I'd use the Search link on the top of the page; you're bound to get your answers there.

Short answer: It's what happens when your brain's being asked to handle more than it's capable of handling. Can look like anything from a tantrum to a shutdown.

im a huge self injurior, i do it a lot of sensory related or because it sorta feels right when i do it like its only right to punish myself. I'm a huge headbanger, i dont think a week goes by without me having a permanent bruise on my forehead along with a permanent bump because everytime its about to go away i put a new one back again lool.

Yeah, for a long while used to be every day, though I don't bruise easily at all (haven't got a noticeable bruise for at least 10 years, though I am running into things all the time, just through clumsiness, never mind the self-injury).

Nowadays it's more like once a week. Yesterday it was because I thought we were going home, except my mom was taking me to an appointment and going directly on the freeway, and she would try to talk to me during the car, and it got to be too much. I alternated from meltdown to shutdown every couple minutes or so, though fortunately it wasn't too bad.

One time recently I was in the front seat during meltdown after a disastrous attempt to get a picture taken in the mall, and apparently I grabbed the wheel (I didn't know until she told me, as I have very little body awareness or spatial awareness at all during these times, and during these times I have accidentally hit family members, which would make me feel terribly guilty and make me cry, especially since as a child I didn't understand how I could hit someone and not know about it, so I would say that I didn't hit them like they said, which made it look like I was in denial).

Not anything severe but i have gouged out a big chunk of my lip before - one of my stims is picking at my lip and you can't pick at it very long before it gets bloody

Because sometimes I get so angry I don't know what else to do.

i used to cut for the typical reasons- either become numb or escape it. get the sensory back to even keel.

at this point in my life i don't seriously injure myself anymore because i have allowed myself more "weird behavior." i pet and rock and stuff instead, just all of the time, and that prevents me from getting to the meltdown point quite as often as i used to.

now when i have a meltdown, i will still slap/punch myself, especially if i am not left alone and someone is invading my space. my anger is just so massive and i cannot communicate it, it wants a voice and so my fists have to speak for it sometimes.

I haven't done anything serious for months and months. To be honest, I stopped because I saw that certain improvements I wanted in my life were only going to happen if I started giving the appearance of being 'together'. Or rather, that motivated me and I started to find ways around it and did CBT and got on a good diet and exercise regime to limit my meltdowns.

Historically, I hit my limbs, bang my head on walls, cut, bite hands and wrists a lot. I used to wake up with bruises and not remember how I got them.

When I am severely depressed, I cut myself. Sometimes for the weirdest reasons like the most recent was about 2 months ago and I was trying to cut some micro devices inside of me that was trying to kill me. I know that sounds delusional but I was actually feeling the things inside me and I was scared. Now it is rare that I feel the things and I know if I attempt to cut them out, I will go to the hospital. That is what my case worker, psychologist/ psychiatrist and my parents said so I don't do it. I'm not depressed now though, in fact I might be more manic than anything else.

Self batterer. I beat myself, and part of me takes on the roll of the abuser , but onto myself. Why? Because I have no outlet, and have to cope with my relatives letting out their frustrations and feelings. Yet, they don't let me feel my own negative feelings.

I used to for a while when younger not anymore.

I used to punch walls frequently. I'm not so bad any more.

But I always had some form of bruised knuckle/s