Hate family get togethjer

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Yep, another family gathering hater here. I've always been the odd duck. I've been tortured in many ways, though my family would deny calling it torture. They would tickle me against my wishes, pop balloons knowing how much I hate it, and force me to be part of inane discussions.

I have nothing in common with my family and I've always been made to feel like it was my fault I didn't fit in. Like if I "chilled out" enough it would be fine.

Here I am, nearly 40 and I avoid my family whenever possible. Unfortunately the familial guilt has not loosened enough for me to break off all contact. My wife and I have been considering moving to the east coast in a few years...that ought to complete the break.

I enjoy them. I get along with most of my family.


I like them better if they are hosted at our house as they tend to be as I can escape to my room if I want to.


I've also gotten into the habit of being the camera lady and recording.. as I'm busy with something.

I hate family get togethers too. My family is loud, drunk and obnoxious. My mom isn't like them (it's her side of the family) normally, but when she's around them her voice gets twice as loud and twice as high pitched, it is scary.

I end up being ignored, which is cool, I have no idea how to interact with these people.

wow that was the firts thread I posted on here, nice to see it resurrected

They are the worst! I feel so awkward just sitting there with them, I feel like an outcast or something every time. I hate having to call them "family" too. I either barely know them or I don't know them at all, and having to act like I care is sooo anoying. I feel a lot better when I go through these things alone, like if I go into a room where no one else is for example. People tend not to bother me about it as much as they used to cause I think they get the picture these days.
All family funerals, birthdays or any kind of celebration are pointless... To me anyway. I really don't get what could be so great about them.

I only like them if they are small, and they involve my father's side of the family.

My mother has 7 sisters and 2 brothers, they all have 3-4 kids each, my brother and I are the oldest. Many of my cousins don't have their life straight at all (one is in jail and many quit school, and some became teen moms) plus my aunts are old-fashoned to the point that it really bugs me. They are aware of my AS, but still expect me to at least 'act' like a yappy middle-aged woman the way they do, rather then be who I really am.

My Father only has one brother, I have one cousin and we are very close, I am very much like my father and his family and I get along great, no fonies... nothing.

I don't like them much either, and avoid them. I resent the way I'm looked down on not treated equally, as it has been most of my life. There comes a time when you have to say enough is enough.

The lies my mother and sometimes other siblings tell about me disgust me as well and when I try to defend myself, I am ignored. It seems like whoever tells the first story, no matter what it is, is telling the truth, and the rest are lies. That never made sense to me. Having other people tell others what I like to do and what I think really hurts me. I'm the only one who knows what I think, feel, like, dislike, etc., but nobody listens to me when I say so, it has to come from someone else.

I've got a better life, without their foolish games. They also don't like the fact my wife is bi-racial(white/black). The only way to win their game is not to play.

I didn't really care for them when I was younger. I never really knew anyone there besides my cousin. Nowadays something usually comes up that prevents me from going, which is a relief.

Over the past coupld of years I've pretty much cut all family gatherings out of my life, including the holidays. I don't like being around all the people, and this includes my immediate family (parents, siblings, close cousins, etc.) My cousin has three kids, including a set of twins. We always get invited to their birthday parties, and though I love those kids and my cousin, I HATE all her friends and their spoiled, bratty children. For the past 2-3 years my wife has been my savior... I claim to be busy working and she goes by herself. She knows how such gatherings bother me, and she is really a champ.

Come on... it's about time you get a chance to meet people. Why do you just hide from people who could also be your friends? You'd feel less lonely...

Because sometimes hiding is fun. No one can be pushed into socializing. They have to really want to do it or it won't be a good experience.

Family gatherings are unpleasant. I'm okay with visiting my father's side of the family, because they live in a cooler area and there are not too many of them.

My mother's side of the family is very large, though (she has ~8 siblings, and most have had 1-3 children each), lives in an even hotter area than where my family lives now, and the house we usually stay in has no central air conditioning. I wouldn't usually mind, but 90-100 degree weather in a concrete house is barely tolerable. It's pretty noisy because the neighbors like to play loud music, sometimes into the night. My cousins are interesting and fun to talk to for the most part, but there are so many of them that it is pretty uncomfortable being together. There's also the awkwardness of different social/political views, because all of my mother's side of the family seems to be Catholic and socially conservative. Some speak mostly or only Spanish, and because I'm the only one besides my sister that looks white, people assume I can't speak it. One of my aunts in particular seems to, even though her English is much worse than my Spanish and she has had over twice as much time as I have had to learn her second language!

Some of the difficulty comes from being introverted. I've been told that when I spend most of my time alone, it looks like I don't enjoy visiting my family (there is some truth in that), though I doubt I could spend most of my time around all of them and keep my sanity for a week or so even if I enjoyed it.

i love family get togethers, most of my family are irish, so lots of beer, and then i usually get the keyboard out and we have a big old sing along (having a note-for-note mental encyclopedia of popular music in your brain is pretty useful for these kinda things) and although i sometimes feel slightly guilty for not keeping regular contact with some of them, this feeling soon goes away when the beer gets flowing ^.^ x

I recently was diagnosed with Aspergers (doctors had told me for years that it was just a central auditory processing disorder and ADD). I have a very loud boisterous extended family who tease and banter with one another. Unfortunately this comes across to me- who has a difficult time reading whether or not someone is joking or being serious with me - as rude and insensitive. They are also very touchy feely people and don't often understand why I'm ok with hugs and touch that are initiated by me but if someone catches me unawares then I get really stressed out and feel as though my personal space is being invaded. A combination of all these factors have lead to multiple meltdowns over the years and as a result I don't have close relationships with many of my family members including my aunt M, her 3 kids and her husband (they have often dismissed my then undiagnosed aspie traits as "being difficult" or a "drama queen"). Its come to a point where I am not sure if my relationship with some of my extended family is even salvageable but my parents and my aunt Trish who I am close with say that my less than compassionate family members may be more understanding if they know its Aspergers. I'm still afraid that I'm going to get judged and teased by my cousins and my aunt and uncle who I don't get along with. Should I try to explain that its Aspergers and go from there or is this just a relationship thats not even worth saving anymore?

my mother is a selfish birdbrain. she was a good provider but didnt know how to raise 5 kids emotionally. my real dad isnt much better, i havent seen him in over 10 years and the last time he had a straw up his nose snorting drugs reading fictional incest magazines

our family getogethers are all about eating wich i rarely do because im on a diet. im all for it because my mom has satalite tv and i watch gemshopping network. then i return home and fall back into my routine wich i love

my sisters are all grown and have there own familys so i dont see them all that much but we keep in touch on facebook

ohmygoodness, some of the worst evenings of my life have been family get togethers. ugh. never again