For those 40+ diagnosed with AS

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I wouldn't agree to be educated by anyone who wasn't both an Aspie and a proven success at becoming a good enough social relater in spite of their AS. And I doubt such a person exists. If they exist at all, they'd be so rare to find that it'd take more than one lifetime to weed out the impostors.

Moreover, I don't believe social intuition / empathy / theory of mind can be educated.

And last but not least, I don't believe an institution would agree to educate us on what we really have trouble with: the nonverbal stuff. Because it's nonverbal FOR A REASON. And the reason is that nobody wants to admit it or talk about it. Ëg: what "respectable" institution would agree to educate Aspies on the value of lying, the importance of phoniness, the crucial role of sucking up to those you need more than they need you, etc.

I can see a perfect trap for Aspie naivete's money here. A wishful, naive Aspie and his money would soon be parted.

Self Education, Greentea.

No 'institutions' to tell you what to do, and no-one to demand money from you.
You have adopted a passive-submissive attitude that someone else has to 'do this to you'.


We shall pursue our self education within a fraternity of aspies (and it would be open to auties too).
People on the autistic spectrum are already learning the abilities that you claim to believe we can't learn.


Your defeatist attitude condemns you to failure.
Your passive-submission means that your life will be defined by others- by people who care nothing for you.


We who chart this new course for ourselves are explorers. You can be too, Greentea.


Magliabechi.

The blind leading the blind? You're going to be educated by those as clueless as you?

I have not tried it since my awakening (too expensive) but I can't imagine therapy being helpful. It's all the authoritarian crap that made me such a basket case in the first place.
Why I should expose myself to more of the same and how could that possibly help?

Once you've been introduced to the concept, the best medicine is a place like this so you can work through what it all means. Here, you get links to good reading material, which is not at all what the shrinks want you to have. "I hate the phone"... "I can only cry for little things"... "are these Aspie traits...?" The shrinks would never give you that, even if they knew how.

I would settle for anything. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy...something to help me not screw up the last half of my life. But I'd probably be told I'm too set in my ways. I'm 44 and diagnosed when I was 42.

Yes, idiot is right! He is now diagnosed himself.

I don't think I follow you, who is the idiot?

Merle

Sorry. The clinical psychologist you mentioned. We diagnosed him as being an idiot.

thank you! I agree wholeheartedly!

Merle

thank you! I agree wholeheartedly!

Merle

I was diagnosed last year and at first I was relieved. Ive been asking myself for as long as I can remember "What is wrong with you???"....now I know. However, just as I was basking in the relief I got hit with this grief process. I am lucky in the fact that my health insurance allows for me to have therapy. I just basically go in every two weeks and talk to my psychiatrist. He helps explain things I dont understand and validates my problems. He does say sometimes that he doesnt know if he is really doing anything for me. I feel like he his, I feel like I just need someone who understands.
I do, however ,agree with the OP because most people will look at me and say "so what, youve gotten by this long havent you?"
Well....ok so Im not dead or locked up but I have and still do "suffer" (sorry if the word offends).
I cant remember where but I read that someone said its as if all Aspies die at age 18 because most of the medical field or otherwise acts as if AS does not exist past that age.

FWIW, I wasn't diagnosed until I was 55, and it came about only because I (uncharacteristically) took the initiative to essentially be my own advocate. Like other posters, I had suffered all my life with not fitting in and feeling terminally weird. These problems began to manifest themselves as conflicts at my work, which led me to seek help from the employee assistance program, where the helpful counselor realized that my problems were beyond her expertise and referred me to a psychologist covered by the company's insurance. However, I quit after four sessions with the psychologist, whom I felt was basically "phoning it in"; Asperger's was never mentioned.

Predictably, the work problems worsened to the point that I was literally at the end of my rope. Thankfully, I stumbled upon this site and others like it, found out about Asperger's, and realized that there were other people like *me*. However, getting diagnosis/treatment was still problematic.

Thinking I needed to go through proper channels with my HMO, I contacted my primary care physician's office and told them I simply needed a referral to a psychologist for a mental health condition. They told me that the earliest available appointment was in TWO MONTHS -- ! !?! Now, maybe it's just me, but I think it's completely unacceptable to tell someone with a suspected "mental health condition" that they will have to wait TWO MONTHS to see the doctor.

Then I tried contacting a couple of psychology clinics that specialized in ASD, but was basically told to try somewhere else. Looking back now, I wonder if it was because I was an adult (and therefore beyond hope?).

Finally, in absolute desperation I e-mailed my insurance plan's help center, telling them that I suspected I had Asperger's and urgently needed to consult with a psychologist with ASD expertise, preferably one who had experience treating adult Aspies. Fortunately, within a couple of days I had an appointment with such a person, who diagnosed my Asperger's and continued to treat me 1-2 times a month for the next two years.

The main thing my psychologist (a self-avowed NT, btw) did for me was to help me see alternative ways of understanding and perceiving different situations/people at work, showing me how my AS makes me react and behave in various circumstances. He also helped me realize how NT's think/feel, and how to deal with that. Best of all, he managed to keep me employed long enough to become eligible for retirement benefits!

Anyway, my point is that often you have to manage your own health care if you want to get effective treatment, whether for AS or some other health condition. It would be *nice* if we could count on people to do the right thing for us, but in my experience such behavior is rare.

Don't have an ASD diagnosis but . . .

I have a really good psychotherapist who doesn't try any Freudian stuff on me. We basically talk about decision making, understanding my emotions (I have alexithymia - can't describe my feelings), and working on getting my nervous system to stop going into overdrive. In basic and practical ways, these are things that really help me, insurance has paid for none of my sessions (for 4 years), but I keep going because she helps me understand what's going on with me, and that understanding is tremendous.

Z