This is considered rude??

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Actually there's a bit of contention between myself and my girlfriend because I've made no secret that I detest soap operas (or "daytime tv drams" I think is the official term). And sometimes I joke about it. It really is only intended as a joke when I do, but she takes it VERY personally. She says she feels like I'm calling her stupid because she watches them. I'm not of course. I know she's smart, she knows she's smart, and she knows that I know she's smart. It doesn't seem to matter. And in her case it seems to be linked to the way that her biological family treated her when she was a child... so now that she's an adult, what are to me "playful jabs" that shouldn't be offensive at all are very difficult for her to tolerate because she associates it with previous emotional abuse.

I don't think that's what's going on here though, just thought I'd share on the subject of being sensitive about one's entertainment.

I guess that's either they think that the critic doesn't get the show - and is therefore, contemptibly dumb.

Or that the critic is much smarter than them, because they find the show quite intellectually challenging.

Either option puts the critic above or below the offendee in intellect.

And intellectually-challenged people can be notoriously sensitive about having their intellects publically dissed.

A bit of a minefield for most Aspies, who tend to be more analytical and intellectual than NT's of comparable IQ.

Stop me if I'm talking complete balloney here.

I've been told it's rude. I think people should be able to tolerate someone criticising something they like.

I suppose it depends how you said it. If you said in a really angry voice, they might be annoyed because they might feel that you're threatening their right to watch what they want on TV. If you said it as a casual comment, they should get over it.

Hmm...it doesn't sound rude to me. I'd have said the same thing you did. I don't know why they got upset.

Hey I've seen a bad comment on B&J. I even have an online friend who fell asleep during the first five minutes of the film. He was probably tired when that happened. I have fallen asleep during a movie because it was soooo boring. Michael and Too fast and Too Furious but it took me maybe a half hour to get tired before I slept, not the first five minutes of the films. I also feel asleep during Coneheads because I wasn't enjoying that movie. I have a grandmother who always fell asleep during Jurassic Park.

I don't see how it's rude. Isn't it just showing your opinion?

Yeah. But I am sure people can say bad things about a movie just to make fun of someone and it's not even their true opinion. Very few people have said some insults about my favorite movie but I dunno if their thoughts were genuine or they were just trying to upset me.

I would actually be offended if someone said "I hate America" or "America SUCKS!" right in front of me.

I'd be royally entertained.
I LOVE people who don't buy into sheep-headed propaganda.

I'm married to an anti-American Canadian and my extended family is very gung-ho yay America republicans.

Thankfully I have told him on many occasions to just not bring it up.

It's happen to me before. My friend growing up was the type that would say she didn't like something someone liked as a way of expressing her dislike for that person without saying she actually disliked them. She wanted everyone to like what she wanted and she didn't want to ever return the favor which is one idiosyncracy she had I didn't really like.
I realize it isn't the same thing. I have done both before. I have disliked something someone I dislike likes and I have innocently expressed not liking something someone likes.
What I do when I say I don't like something someone else likes without realizing they like it before hand is say immediately after they tell me "Oh, I'm sorry I didn't realize that's your favorite show" or whatever.

Last edited by ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo on 20 Dec 2008, 7:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

oops

Last edited by ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo on 20 Dec 2008, 7:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

oops

Last edited by ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo on 20 Dec 2008, 7:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Wait, is insulting someone's favorite movie or TV show the same as insulting someone's religion or nationality or race, or disability?



I really see TV shows and movies as totally different things than the other stuff I mentioned above. I wouldn't be upset if someone told me they dislike B&J and listed their personal reasons. It's not my movie. It's MGM's. Maybe the actors would be insulted because they played in it. Same as people who helped make the movie and maybe the two screen writers. They would take it as saying they are bad, they suck, etc.


But I was insulted when my ex said Sam was an idiot because of his poor spelling and how he functioned. Uh there are people out there like that who have that disability and I could relate to him about his obsessions so I felt he was putting me down.

You posted as I was making my post. I never realized people can say they hate a TV show or a movie to express their dislike for the person.

I would still tell them "I am entitled to my opinion. If I don't like the show I don't like it. It has nothing to do with you. It's not your show."

I grew up with both directness and passive aggression from people. My friend was passive aggressive about some things and direct about others. She was direct about being passive aggressive, as in, very open in declaring that she didn't like something I did.