"Vacuum cleaner is a horrible gift.'" Is this an

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A third possibility is that the 'hint's being dropped by the woman fell on deaf ears. "I wanted jewelry, and you get me a...a.. vacuum cleaner?"...

I think at least part of it is that it's a gift for a wife. It's in effect, buying a gift for oneself. But worse. Take your wife out for dinner, and you both enjoy it equally. Buy her a vacuum cleaner, you both get the benefit -- clean rugs -- but she does the work. It's like, instead of taking your wife out to dinner, having her cook you both dinner and calling it a gift from you to her.

seems like a good, sensible present to me...especially if you have an old or bodgey one or no vacuum cleaner at all. i'd love it. My kind of gift. (better than a stupid floral diary or a useless scarf with a tag on it that will scratch and itch....)

Yes, he is on the spectrum (though was not diagnosed). My mother would put the lack of romantic gestures etc. down to him being male, but at the same time would always comment how he was far worse at such things than other men. She would give him examples of how others treated their wives and children (e.g. wanting to spend time around them).

I would be very careful about giving someone a vacuum cleaner as a gift, it is a device for the removal of dirt. I would say that unless someone asks for one I would not give one to someone as a christmas or birthday present. But if a person is getting up home for the first time it would be OK to give them one.

As a new home present it is a simple case that you are helping the person equip their home by giving them an expensive machine.

I have asked my NT wife and she agrees with me. My wife said that such a gift might lead to trouble.

To my mind the gift of a vacuum cleaner is like giving a toilet unblocking kit to a person, both are equally likely to stir up a great deal of upset.

What I like about my mum is that she always gives gifts that people can use (i.e practical or sort of practical gifts). She's not aspie but she could be the sort of person to give someone a vaccum cleaner for a present. She never gives silly things that you never use because they're pointless, she always gives good, nice things that people will use either for pleasure or for work. If she knows a person really well she will give him/her something he/she really likes (even if it isn't practical). I personally love practical presents (unless they are practical items which don't work, or whatever).

If I really needed a vacuum cleaner and someone got me one for Christmas, I would be quite pleased with it as I'm not overly interested in receiving romantic gifts for special occasions. This is mainly because I'm not a big jewellery wearer (I only wear it on occassions) and I don't like it when people buy perfume for me as I am really fussy about smells, unless they buy me one that they know I like.

My mum has a different feeling about this though (she is the sort who wants jewellery and perfume). I remember, when I was 7 years old, my mum received a gift from my dad that, I think, most of you will find worse than that of a vacuum cleaner - oven gloves. You can just imagine her reaction can't you? He never made that mistake again. I thought it was really funny. My dad's response was that she'd been saying she needed some new ones for months.

Haha, it sounds like he was actually paying attention to her words, and he cared enough to remember them and act accordingly! And my goodness, who would want someone to do that?!

My aspie son *loves* vaccuum cleaners! He would adore having his own.

Are you married?

Question... just curious... is anyone here married, and would think it's okay for your husband or wife to get you a vacuum cleaner as a gift?

I see lots of people saying it would be an okay gift, but I don't see anyone really saying it would be an okay gift from their spouse.

Unless my husband planned to also do the vacuuming with the vacuum cleaner (and, actually, he does the vacuuming ), I'd be pissed if he bought me a vacuum cleaner as a gift. A present is supposed to be something for the person you give it to, not something for the person giving it. I don't want a present that says "I'm giving myself clean floors, making you do the work to get them, and calling it a gift to you". No thanks.

Now, if a non-live-in boyfriend gave me a vacuum cleaner, that would be a different situation. Un-romantic, yeah, but I'm okay with un-romantic. If I needed a vacuum cleaner, I'd probably be pleased.

The problem with giving one's wife (or husband) a vacuum cleaner is it's not actually a gift at all. You bought a household appliance that's for both of you and called it a gift.



Now, see, if that were me who'd said I needed them, and they were a out of the blue purchase, I'd be pleased. But if they were a gift I wouldn't be. For the reasoning above. My husband eats the food I cook too, so it's not a gift. The remembering and buying it is thoughtful, but the item itself is not a gift, but something for both him and her.

I read a joke once about something like this. I can't remember it exactly, but it went along the lines of

if you buy a vacuum cleaner, you're saying that you think she's just a maid!
if you buy her a saucepan, then you're saying that you think she's just here to look after you and cook your food!
if you buy her lingerie, you think she's a sex object...
(It went on and on... the punchline was that only jewellery would do)

I bought my mum an Italian grammar guide for christmas- spent a lot on it because she's doing it as an evening class and wants to continue it on. She kept going on and on about how I 'bought her a textbook for christmas' next year it's cheap-ass earrings...

Mr, I am married and would be perfectly fine with getting a vacuum for Christmas, but I do understand the joke of it all. Though, I would have needed some help "getting it" before I married my husband. He happens to know all the "A woman's place is in the kitchen" jokes. I specifically knew exactly the joke when I read this post today because of the other night.

A commercial came on TV for dish soap. I don't remember which company, or else I was going to provide a youtube link. It was talking about how the dish soap not only cleaned the dishes, but guaranteed that a woman would have silkier hands after 5 days use. He said that the commercial was so wrong. I automatically got confused and apparently gave him that "I'm confused look." and he explained that it meant the commercial suggests that the woman should be cleaning the dishes "like a good woman should." It's supposed to be really sexist.

Yes, that's the way I see it. It's also a very boring gift. I remember being dissapointed because my brother got everyone great gifts and I got a portfolio folder. This year he made up for it by buying me a jelly bean dispenser.

I never understood that joke either. People have to do their chores anyway, vacuum cleaners make it easier. My mom said it would make her feel like a maid, but she's not doing anything different.

I need a new vacum cleaner but I don't want to buy one. I'd rather spend money on something else. All the vacum cleaner I like are really expensive. So I don't like shopping for a vacum cleaner and would be only happy if I got to take away a dyson or super queit electrox. I think a vacum cleaner as a gift would be the best present as long as it wasnt a crappy second hand or bought from a garage sale.

Married (again) 10 years now. The missus buys her own vacuum cleaners. The financial situations' a bit strange (she has a stranglehold on the checkbook), so I don't actually buy her anything, because I rarely have any money.

I, as many other men (both NT and AS), are convinced that women speak 2 languages; words which have their original meaning, and a 2nd, 'hint-filled/allusion/unknown' meaning to every sentence that comes out of their mouths... I just wish I could determine what the actual hints are...