Do you ever wonder if you DON'T have AS?

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I have it in a way that's similar to what you describe. I'm definitely not vague or disconnected and in other countries than Sweden, which has the highest diagnosis rate in the world of AS as far as I know, I wouldn't have been diagnosed I think. Probably not in the UK and definitely not in the US.

In countries like France or USA, most people like me are undiagnosed aspies with random excentric or slightly asocial behaviour from time to time, I'm pretty sure of that. I can't relate very well to lower functioning, "standard" diagnosed aspies but I relate extremely well to people in the grey zone. The very high functioning undiagnosed aspies which exist everywhere. People who seem almost normal and are usually believed to have other problems than AS when there's some conflict or social issues around them. People who just learn about my negative sides assume I'm borderlinish or a sociopath, not AS.

Last edited by Zoonic on 06 May 2009, 7:49 am, edited 4 times in total.

You have to ask yourself: does it really matter whether you have a label? Are you aware of your areas of deficiency and making sure that they don't run your life? Has learning about the symptoms as a group given you deeper insight into who you are?

Professionals can't agree on who has AS and who hasn't. So if they can't even figure it out, why should you?

I'm still trying to figure it all out, too. The bottom line is to either not care, or just decide if you do or do not have AS. No one here will judge you for any decision that you make.

I can relate to every thing on that site. No wonder I thought Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter actor) had AS - he has dyspraxia.

Hmm, good point.
But I've only tried to be social for about 6 years and for some reason having minimal input in conversation still makes people like me. I think my ex only liked me when I was drunk. He didn't like it when I was too quiet. I wasn't diagnosed back then. I saw myself in a completely different way.
I seem to only remember chunks of information (like a brief summary) rather than have this amazing long term memory like most people here.
I had hemolyctic disease when I was younger which could have affected my brain.

Last edited by pensieve on 06 May 2009, 7:54 am, edited 1 time in total.

I'll second that. I've seen her on these boards, she sounds too... what's the word... "aware" maybe? Cognizant? I almost wanna say sentient, but that would imply I think people with autism don't have sentience. She understands her abilities and shortcomings really well, I guess, so she might really just be an aspie.

I also need a dictionary to understand most of what you just wrote.

It's good stuff. I like how you word things, by the way.

Basically, he said that you're much to normal to have HFA.

I can easily get friends, go to parties etc if I want to, but I'm still a social misfit in many ways. I agree that a lot of the diagnosed aspies seem to have a problem interacting with neurotypicals easily, going to parties and clubs and getting accepted, but the undiagnosed who are too high functioning to be thought of as AS by most, do these things all the time. All of my contacts with other diagnosed aspies have resulted in me looking down on them and viewing them as primitive incarnations of my own compulsive behaviours I had as a child but have longsince outgrown. I have bonded with several neurotypicals in my life, felt real empathic contact, but never with a diagnosed aspie. With the right social stimulation, it really feels like some parts of my brain I normally don't use activates. I become more neurotypical but I still keep most of my AS traits.

I think there's need for a new diagnosis at the very top of the spectrum for all those who are in the grey zone today but still have social difficulties in some fields. My difficulties aren't about not being able to read body language or functioning socially, it's about accepting what others view as "normal".
I can easily behave like them but sometimes I'm just angered by normal neurotypical behaviour and feel it's filthy and inferior. That's when I can start a conflict over what someone is wearing or what kind of food they are eating and make everyone dislike me and see me as an arrogant douche with issues.
If I see a group of people bonding with each other out of fear, something I can easily analyze as primitive fear or some other emotion, it can be provocative to me and make me lash out towards those people or people in general. This is my only real social problem, the anger. It ruined my school years, it ruined everything. In most other cases when in public I'm like a neurotypical, I just don't identify with group emotions. I was always a very strong individual.

I find it extremely fun to say things I know is offensive, just to make those around me in the queue become uncomfortable and angry. I like provocing neurotypicals to the limit by acting like an arrogant psychopath in public. I know what is inappropriate and I can feel and read the emotional reactions of everyone around me.
In school I could always function normally for a month or so, then something ticked me off or I got disgusted and bored with being normal and felt I had to provoce or start a scene to break out of neurotypical behaviour, to free myself and express my disgust for neurotypicals in general.
Upsetting others, hurting them and making them feel bad about themselves or making them so angry they want to kill me always felt like a strong magnetic surge in my brain, like a super injection of some really strong drug. One reason might be it's my only way to get any kind of real social kick because a neurotypical day to day life bore the hell out of me.

This is also a form of AS, but very different from how most standard aspies would think and act. I think I might have light AS coupled with behavioural disorder/sociopathic behaviour after all.

I generally have/had classic AS symptoms, but all mildly. And many of them have gone away as I have gotten older. I was lucky that I did not need professional help. I know that many here are not so lucky.

This leads to another question. I think AS is officially considered to be a developmental disorder. As such, should it follow that once diagnosed with AS, one will always have AS, even once they are done developing?

AS is the top disorder, well, it was, as Atypical Asperger's is a common diagnosis nowadays (which comes under PDD-NOS).

There's a problem with labelling people who're too well functioning with a "disorder", as are they really disordered then, and if someone is so close to normal in what they can and can't do, isn't that saying that "normal" is a disorder? I see normal people all the time having problems with interpersonal relations; it's normal to have problems with such.

AS/Autism appears to shade into "normal", which is represented by Schizoid PD, SPD and NLD, all of which are effectively "normal" as far as AS/Autism goes, with the latter two being nowhere near "normal".

Sure, often.

I kind of want to say I was classical in childhood, AS since late teenage years.

Which isn't possible of course. but yeah.

I have heard several times of people diagnosed with "classic" autism early in life and later being diagnosed with AS later on. So, I think it is possible in your case.

Hi there! well actually clumsyness appears as a feature of AS in almost any manual I've read, as well as very punctual motorical dificulties like copying poses from some one else and so on.

The importance of the label you get depends on how much can you benefit from the treatment. ADHD training was fantastic, I still can improve but the change is unmessurable, and the medicins help me a lot.

As for AS if I am not Aspie as my coach says, I know that social training and a better focused coaching would be determining for my life quality saving me a lot of stress, manias and phobias. As a fact, even though I'm not diagnosed yet, just getting informed has saved me a lot!

Good luck with your journey!

i am me no matter what i am called.

Ahhh, I forgot to consider that professionals pretty much do what they want anyway and that some people thus are diagnosed like that.

But it's not allowed. That's what I meant when I said it's not possible. My mind's like: not allowed = impossible.

Same in the Netherlands! but what is more important... is that this people that say that most AS they have seen are more disconected (like my coach and my shrink told me) is people that is not specialized in the Autism Spectrum disorders... this people have no fcuking idea of what they are talking about, they have seen a couple of autists and they think right away that all autistics are like this.

My coach and my schrink they were so against the idea, because they are specialized in ADD-ADHD they have no idea of what I'm talking about and for them like most NT's calling autism is way too heavy like those very severe kids unable to talk. Then, if you keep reading and come up with some useful information their first reaction is "you should stop reading about it, we don't like it/we don't think is healty for you". A friend of mine told me that they do that because they feel like you are trying to play smart ass with them and they feel offended.

so what I did is that I went to them and told them to go to fcuk themselves that I shouldn't feel bad or intimidated by them, that it was mediocre from them to tell me to stop reading because i'm offending their "experience" or "knowledge" and that if it was so I had right to always change docs... looking for a more profesional or prepared help to the competent clinic (wich is their competitor as well).

Then they changed completely! they approved the AS diagnostic test and all...

I just wrote home what I was going to tell them (wich was a serie of ideas rounding in my mind for a while already) and used it as the guide lines. Doctors always get me comfused and trapped, they take "unconsciently" advantage of my social incompetence and slowness but that time came out really well...