Seeking answers...

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I've been thinking about this the last day or so, and in addition to my initial response, about wanting answers so that my boyfriend will realize I'm not playing games with him, I believe my desire for a diagnosis is stemming from my need of explanations.

You see, I was always one of those "ok, but why?" kids, if someone asked/told me to do something. I would often tell them 'ok', but would then ask why they wanted me to perform a certain task, and wouldn't perform it until I was told. I need things to make absolute sense to me, and if they don't, I get very agitated.

For instance, the other morning, after my boyfriend spent the night (which is always interesting...I love having him stay with me, but I also tend to get little or no sleep, because his being near makes it feel like I'm lying directly underneath the sun...his body heat overwhelms me!), he woke up early and announced he was heading home. I had it in my head that we might get some breakfast, or spend the morning together. He stated he had things to get done before this evening. I demanded to know what...he said preparing for Sunday School with his teaching partner. I asked him when they were doing this, and he said he didn't know. So, it bothered me that he was leaving and I didn't have an exact explanation for why. In my head, he could still stay a while (and, also, it messed with the plans I had formed in MY head). Turns out, they ended up going right over to the church when he got home, and I held no grudges. Had he been able to say: "I'm heading home, because I need to meet so-and-so at this precise time for this length of time", there would not have been an issue.

Boy, do I feel sorry for my boyfriend. *sigh*

Anyway, because of this, I simply cannot accept that "I am this way" without knowing definitely "why". It's just one of my things.

Same here. I was born with a severe alergy to fascism. I remember screaming matches when I was a little kid over the phrase "because I said so." I wasn't defiant yet. I just didn't get it. I still don't. They push those herd-instinct buttons (buttons that I don't have) can't understand why I don't immediately fall in line, and get seriously pissed as though I've done something bad.

Most of the time, when they don't have a good reason and rely on social pressure to get what they want, it's usually an abuse of power. Subtle, maybe even trivial, but if they put it in real words rather than ridicule, they would look stupid and wouldn't get their way.

I didn't follow that recent conversation with your boyfriend. Today, I would have shrugged it off as something he didn't know how to explain. I've been there too many times to hold it against someone.

Sure
But that is exactly why i wrote that diagnosis is pointless
All it would tell you is that u r "this way" because u r an Aspie which is quite meaningless
you'll get a name or a term
the way i see it ,a name or a tag is not an explanation
'

but in a way what she is seeking is a form of fascism since diagnosis will save her the necessity of dealing with her behavior by giving her a false group(AS) identity

can't u find the "why" by yourself
what's wrong in wanting to be sure your friend is totally committed to you and really want to spend the time with you
if that is the way u feel toward him u must be sure he feel the same way towards you
many of us tend to be "obsessive" toward the ppl we love since we dedicate to other our full attention and time we expect the same from them
you would save you a lot of pain by making sure the "other" sense you the same way u sense him
there nothing crazy about that
it's a simple survival instinct

Not exactly. It depends on how you take it.

Psychology in general is a sham. It's not really a science at all. At best, it's a philosophy. At worst, it's fascism.

If you go to a guru and get some useful information that rings true, that can be helpful. He can give you some interesting ideas to chew on, which can lead you to some books or some buzz words to check out on google. And eventually you'll stumble into WrongPlanet.

If you shop around and find a charlatan who will give you the diagnosis you want, you can get drugs or services or welfare. Or you might get abuse, there's always that.

the man is largely responsible for the proliferation of the "theory of mind" that portray AS as lacking of empathy
as an authority figure his views and theories as us having a "male", systematizing personality contribute largely to the damage the "professional" community and the public at large inflict on us as our sensitivities and our depth were ignored and too many of us were treated like animals in need of learning how to feel and behave correctly
this is not some minor complaint
lot of AS suffered a life time depression caused by this attitude and many committed suicide
it took really long time and a lot of effort to convince the scientific community that the autistic are very sensitive and very emphatic and we still have a long way to go before the idiots could understand that we just have a different way,perhaps more honest.of "dealing out" our emphaties.
BTW
i work as a system analyst for many years so u might say i fit the profile but as strange as it sound i also have feelings and empathy and i don't need to waste tenth of millions of public funds in order to prove that
his research,like most of the other papers on autism, is a pseudo science at it worth,
as it goes to any length to ignore facts that doesn't sit well with preconception.

in the last few years i heard him say that he is ready to consider that AS are human being too, you know,with feeling ,like the rest of them
thank you very much
to me it sound like a Nazi admitting a Jew might be a person(i know he is a jew,so am i)
or a white admitting a black person is also a human being

at least he has a nice cousin [the guy who played Borat] who have the talent to expose the NT society ugliness and stupidity
i guess he is also a nice person{relatively} because England is more advanced toward AS than any other country partly because at least some of the pro's there actually see people like us where in most countries we just invisible/

Thanks for the imformation looks like we cant trust anyone charlatans come in many guises.It seems to me that we (humans) lack a emotional vocabulary leading to distress for everyone some pay lip sevice but dont put themselves in others shoes which is essential to understanding anyone.Putting people in boxes dsm like is not helpful but aspies is different we see the absurdity of human interaction the law of the herd but nts mostly conform to what ever is the current model work hard breed hard shop hard dont ask any questions and be thankful you are free.We have insight and should be heard perhaps we have solutions.