Autism Is Not An Excuse To Do Nothing

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^ Looks like the shape of a merino sheep.

I have to admit I am kind of afraid to use some of my 'talents' that I have developed through my existence, but getting closer to letting that go. Just not sure that society is ready for something like me is part of it, I wonder what people would think if they knew what I have been thinking about since I was 12...it has yet to be seen I suppose.

Threaten them with death, if they think the odds are better at doing the thing they can't or will fail at than dying they will probably try that first....of course if they really cannot do it than you risk being a part of their death which could at least bring man-slaughter charges or whatever.

I zoomed in 500% on the animated gif and I think it's some sort of bread.. but difficult to tell. There's little fibrous strands sticking out here and there that don't really look apple OR bread like, but overall I think it looks more like bread than an apple.. considering there's no sign of an apple core, or seeds, or stems, or skin at the ends etc. Can't be 100% sure, but of the two choices I'd say bread.

The biggest thing to overcome is believing you can't do something or will fail at it. "Whether you think you can, or you can't, you're right." - Henry Ford. So, rather than finding something to motivate you to do something you don't think you can do, it's better to figure out how to change your own beliefs to be that you CAN do something - because then you can do it.

Otherwise I'd agree with Sweetleaf.. do or die mentality is pretty strongly motivating. If you get into the mindset that you either do this or you die, then chances are pretty damned good that you can accomplish whatever it is you're trying to. I don't use the "do or die," mindset thing much at all.. not so much in a self preservation sort of way, anyways. I'm more motivated to help others, so I might be more likely to put myself into the mindset that if I don't do this thing, someone else I love will die, and doing this thing guarantees their safety. Which brings me to my next point, a much more positive twist on the same thing than focusing on death & a fight or flight response:

What motivates me to do things I don't think I can? (or to change my beliefs from "I don't think I can" to "I think I can?") Love. Love for another person. There have been many difficult things I've done where I felt exhausted and could have just quit.. but I put myself in the mindset that I Need to do this thing for ____ person/people that I love, and then I'm able to find the energy, capability, persistence etc to do it. I know that in reality I don't actually need to do said task for said person, so it's a bit of a mindf**k self hypnosis technique of sorts. If I make myself truly believe that in the moment I am doing said task for said loved one(s), and it's very very real in my mind, then it is "real" because perception is reality.. alter your own perceptions to believe this, even momentarily, and you can utilize the power of love for other people to accomplish rather astonishing things that you might not have otherwise believed were possible.

It's all pretty basic psychology stuff. Thoughts dictate emotions, emotions dictate actions. Change your thoughts to "I can," changes your emotions to feel like you can, which trigger yourself to take the necessary actions to do & accomplish. The trick is figuring out what the trick is to trick yourself into believing you can. It might be a little different for each of us, but the things I wrote above work miracles for me & I hope whoever reads this can take away something valuable from it and perhaps utilize the same little mind tricks to change their approach to completely difficult-for-them tasks.

Which talents? And what have you been thinking about since you were 12? I'm curious. I also think it's a positive thing for you to list your talents, affirming to yourself that you have them!

Probably totally different, but I too wonder how the (business) world is going to react to some of my ideas that I've been thinking about for years that have yet to be seen. I'm not going to wonder forever, though! I'm actively preparing to find out and am inching closer and closer to being able to put my ideas into action and see how others respond. To me, that's the only way. I can't have these ideas and never try them. I'd rather work my ass off for years in preparation for them and then bet everything I've saved & am on the outcome in order to give them a shot. I'd rather do that, spend every penny & all my time and fail miserably, than live the rest of my life wondering if my idea(s) could have worked out. To me, the risk is well worth it. I think we have ideas for a reason and we're meant to pursue them so as not to let them go to waste.

She makes some good points.
What she said stings a bit as I am often sitting around doing absolutely nothing. The problem is when I try to go out and accomplish something I find obstacles that I just can't seem to get through. I am ready for a job, I just can't seem to get one and college is filled with nonsensical unwritten rules. I do not feel free to pursue my dreams. When stress and exhaustion take over, there isn't much else to do but nothing.

Sources of motivation that worked for me in the past:

Reading leading to lightbulb moments: (hey, if they can do that, I can too!)
Encouragement from people who believed in me (teachers, friends, my own children)
Encouragement and input from trusted mentor
Sheer desperation - feeding my family and animals
Sir Nicholas Winton - "if a thing isn't absolutely impossible there must be a way to do it"

People who believed in and loved me brought out the very best in me.

One of the issues that seems very relevant (as I see it) in terms of blocks-to-aspiration is Invalidation.

Before the realization occurs that one is on the spectrum - even if this occurs when you are relatively young - there has always been a history of experiencing invalidation, both in direct forms (eg called a "weirdo" by NTs) and indirectly (ignoring, left out, misdiagnosed as mentally ill etc).

Gaining the important knowledge that one is on the spectrum (a very profound event in terms of self and other awareness) doesn't automatically heal the legacy of accumulated invalidations. The history of invalidations are like unhealed wounds that lay beneath the surface of daily life.

There is little written about a healing process for the accumulation impact of invalidation. To an extent, finding a place where you belong (eg WP) does provide a powerful step toward the healing process and validation for many aspects can be found here. It's the deeper emotional legacy of wounds that is not much addressed, though to my mind it is one of the very important issues in being liberated from the harmful and hurtful past.

Well, my life has been one invalidation after the other.
Just this afternoon I was invalidated by my mother in an inconvenient way (long story, may write in Haven.)
I may have to sever contact with her. She is becoming an albatross.
I think our relationship is tarnished by her failure takes proper care me when I was a child.
I should be more accepting, but I'm one to hold a grudge.

...So what's the particular rah rah wonderful thing waiting for me that I'm ignoring ?

I'm sorry you are still in dire straits. A return to health for you would be pretty wonderful (?) and I hope it happens soon for you, it has been a long haul that you have been through.

Speaking of invalidation...being labelled as making "excuses" is a very common form of invalidation.

Thank you dianthus, very good imo.

Does life precisely require meaning to be lived? - no. Is it nihilist to say that life without meaning is still life? no. Is it philosophically fine and dandy to stand over others and judge them? no.

I'm not trolling at all here my friends, I'm just very queasy about the philosophy of these exterior motivational / inspirational types. They are involved in Social Security in Britain (called Welfare in USA) - they say things like "Life comes in cans!". These people have self righteously psychologically tortured me in the past, until I learnt how to defend myself.

I've been free range for over half a century with a disability so hidden that even I didn't suspect it until 3 years ago. My attitudes might lack sentiment, but my aims are true.

"I see nothing defeatist in being sane" - Larkin

Last edited by Alexanderplatz on 09 Mar 2015, 7:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Everyone, at some level, makes judgments about others everyday. No-one is non-judgmental, though many think they are, I know that... simple example: making judgments about what someone has written on WP - happens all the time, I doubt any of us are exempt from it.

For myself, I could not live life and would not want to without some form of meaningfulness. Otherwise it would be like floating in an endless void. That's just me.

Ok, I'm stating extreme examples. It's the standing over and judging bit I don't like. It's been done to me, a lot.

Self generated meaning: Great stuff

Original thinking: A tall order and very hard work, but in my opinion, worth the struggle

People who actually try to do your thinking for you: I'm a hard liner and start playing ideological whack a mole

I'd have been nothing in life without the power of negative thinking btw.