Are you proud of having Asperger's?

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Joe90
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14 Nov 2010, 1:46 pm

Yer but when you're drunk it's OK. But when you do embarrassing things sobar in the middle of the day, everyone just interprets you as weird. Most of my NT cousins get drunk, and they must do embarrassing things, but they would never do embarrassing things when they're sobar, like I do....

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14 Nov 2010, 1:54 pm

blaine209 wrote:

Okay, I've noticed that a portion of users here say that they are proud of having Asperger's and some even think that "there mind is even better than an NT mind".

Well, I don't feel that way at all. I'm not proud of having Asperger's because I HATE hving Asperger's in every sense of the word. Asperger's hinders EVERY aspect of my life and in many ways just gets worse the older I get. I am not at all ashamed of having Asperger's because I did not ask for it. What sane person would ask for Asperger's? I also have a stuttering problem which I don't like, I'm not proud of it, but I am not the least bit ashamed of it because I didn't ask for it at all. Even though I do not understand why almost everyone is content in our unfair, and chaotic world, I think I would it make life much easier t be able to focus and concentrate during a 1-hour class period, have the same interests as everyone else my age, and have average coordination. I can't speak for everyone who has Asperger's but I for one, have a difficult time just sitting to watch a 1/2 hour show. Focus is almost impossible for me. I once read a horse has an average attention span of 6 seconds. (Who know's maybe I have some horse genes!) Talking is almost impossible for me, it's a struggle for me to even say my own name which 99% of people take for granted. Whenver I am forced to give a speech in class, it takes me 20 minutes to say what it takes most people 5-10 minutes. And it sure would be a lot less lonely to have at least 1 friend and not get stared at for being all alone at break and lunch. Also what I don't understand is that my IQ has been tested to be 122, yet learning is almost impossible for me.I am just glad I was able to learn to read and write, even that was difficult for me. But yeah, other people can sit through a class and learn at least half of what the teacher is saying. Usually I comprehend nothing or sometimes just one detail. I don't know, maybe I have been misdiagnosed with Asperger's maybe there's some unknown glitch in my brain that causes my stuttering, lack of interest in life, inability to concentrate, inability to learn, inability to pick up social cues, and inability to play sports.

Anyway, If I do in fact have Asperger's and other Aspies' are kind of like me, please try to explain to me how you feel proud of your condition. I am very interested to know. Sorry if I sound short and harsh, (typically I am a go-with the flow type of person who hides how he really feels) but around the New Year for some reason every year I become more depressed than usual.

First off:
How many people that responded to your question even read your question?
Does that bother you in some small way?

Have you ever heard of a paragraph?
This is a forum for people with difficulties in understanding 'normal' discourse.
Posting a deluge like that without a paragraph is ignorant at least.
But do you really think that anyone with Aspergers that replied to that, read it
first?

Do you have Aspergers yourself?

Joe90
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15 Nov 2010, 4:33 pm

It's a waste of time dreaming and dreaming about something I'll never be, hence it's hard to give up when I know it's everything I want to be.

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Asp-Z
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15 Nov 2010, 4:40 pm

You know what else is a waste of time? Wallowing in self pity instead of actually trying to sort out your problems, which by the way are probably all in your head and caused by your lack of self confidence.

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15 Nov 2010, 4:59 pm

Quote:

They are all in my head and I have got lack of self-confidence. It's hard to shake out of it though, especially once I've got things stuck in my mind now. My conscience is like a sticky toffee - thoughts get stuck to it. Thoughts like the way I interpret the way people in the street look at me. You know you get the majority of NT women who think they're fat when they're not, or how they go on about how fat they are when they're only 9 stone? That's because they've got a thought stuck in their conscience what is stopping them from ever being able to ''forget'' about it. My NT cousins always thinks she's fat, and she's only 8 stone! She never used to care, but since she's turned in her 30s she's started becoming a little obsessed with things, and her mind is most probably interpreting differently to how small her body really is, and now she's started thinking and worrying about it, the more difficult it has become for her to shake out of it. It's a woman thing. Most women get obsessed with something about them.
It's a bit like me about my self-consciousness. I never used to worry if other people stare at me or not, but lately I've become very creeped out when people stare at me, and now I've got it stuck in my mind I can't forget it again, unless I get Dementia or something.

So yes, I see where you're coming from. The important thing is I am conquering this worry. I am getting out of bed every day to go out into public and face the staring eyes. I go into the charity shop where I volunteer and deal with public. I wouldn't mind people giving me lectures on here if I was locking myself up in a room all the time, then wondering why I'm useless. I'm getting out there every day and actually making an effort in accomplishing things.

But nothing will ever make me stop dreaming about being NT, even if I became a millionairre.

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15 Nov 2010, 5:03 pm

Well it looks like you're going in the right direction, I wish you good luck in shaking the negative thoughts off

Joe90
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15 Nov 2010, 5:22 pm

The negative thoughts are a bit of an obsession. Not a special interest really - it's a bit more of a negative obsession, involving concerns. Maybe I might get over it one day, and start to not worry about what people think of me. But it takes time.

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16 Nov 2010, 8:19 pm

Don't know if I have it or not. Suspect I do. But whatever makes me who I am, I am proud of it because it has made me happy and successful. I have a well paying job in computers and am one of the most valued employees. I attribute my success there due to my likely-aspie obsession with computers abstract problem solving. I also believe that I can enjoy things in life that others cannot enjoy, like the beauty in math or the beauty in listening to 3 uninterrupted hours of Wagner. My life is happy and fulfilling, and I worry that it'd be less so were I different (NT), unable to do as well in my programming and unable to enjoy so many beautiful things that require focused concentration. I don't want to trade Wagner for American Idol.

On the other hand, if I wasn't able to have a job like my current nor to have found the unusual wife who's a good fit for my personality then I'd likely have a different opinion. Before I discovered that computers can be a career, I expected to live in my parents' attic while working some miserable job I'd hate during the day.

I can understand why some would not be proud. I think it depends on the individual's talents, luck, and other life circumstances. Some aspies are happy and fulfilled, some are not. The same is true of NTs. Would you ask an NT who struggles with alcoholism and lost his wife if he was proud of being an NT?

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17 Nov 2010, 6:31 am

Quote:

I can understand why some would not be proud. I think it depends on the individual's talents, luck, and other life circumstances. Some aspies are happy and fulfilled, some are not

I'm glad someone who is proud of having AS is also understanding my pain. That's what I've been trying to explain all along. I'm not very clever, and I never will be. I'm not obsessed with computers, and whatever has been my special interests in my life has never reached to success because I still didn't seem to know the first thing about it.

Quote:

ASP-Z, didn't you know that in Britain adults with disabilities are being discriminated against, when it comes to employment? The job centre tells me that it's the policies to give people with disabilities a chance, but I've found that the goverment is chucking people off unemployment benefits if they turn down a job for any reason. I see a discrimination against people like us hidden in all of this. If I applied for somewhere and the interviewer told me that I must be able to endure loud noise, or confident with customers, or brilliant social skills for this reason and that reason, and ect ect, I would be in limbo. I wouldn't be able to take the job if I'm not the right person for them, and if I turned round to them and said, ''I have Aspergers, it's a mild form of Autism,'' I'm sure I will have less chance. They wouldn't even want to take on a shy NT, let alone somebody with Autism, who struggles at everything life offers.
So people like us are more limited, and we have to be a little picky because we need a job what would suit us. It's fine if you're an intelligent Aspie, but not all of us are. I have Dyspraxia aswell, and I've never been very acedemic. My grades aren't good, and I can't do maths, even if I tried or wanted to. It's just not in me. So I've either got to take a job what isn't right for me, or I'll be thrown off benefits.

Now can you blame me for not being proud of having it?

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17 Nov 2010, 9:13 am

Joe90 wrote:

Quote:

I can understand why some would not be proud. I think it depends on the individual's talents, luck, and other life circumstances. Some aspies are happy and fulfilled, some are not

Quote:

I think I might end up taking a job that I'll struggle at. I won't be thrown off benefits but I've been unemployed for so long that I just want to try any old job.

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17 Nov 2010, 11:56 am

That's easier in other countires, but not here in Britain. In the employers find our how ''useless'' I am, they will sack me, just like that. I wouldn't be able to get back on job-seekers if I got the sack. That's how tough this country has become. From the government's point of view, it's against the rules to have a disability in this country.

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17 Nov 2010, 3:39 pm

Plus it's also hard having AS because NTs expect everyone to live their way.

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17 Nov 2010, 3:43 pm

Joe90 wrote:

The economy's bad and so is the government, but Bill Gates has Asperger's too. Quit making excuses.

Hell, I'm 16 and I help run a phone business while also running multiple ad-funded websites. Brings in some cash.

And yes, I'm the UK too.

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17 Nov 2010, 3:52 pm

Why be proud of having Aspergers?

Joe90
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17 Nov 2010, 3:56 pm

Quote:

The economy's bad and so is the government, but Bill Gates has Asperger's too.

Bill Gates was clever. All male Aspies are clever in a different way because they can focus on their special interests more. My special interest is the weather, but I can't start running my life around it and building a career from it because I just don't seem to go that far with special interests. My mind starts becoming distracted to people. Maybe it's the normal female typical traits coming out in me? If you read through all of my posts you'll notice I don't sound very clever. I don't use intelligent words, that's why I've always got Aspies arguing back on here, because I'm never explaining myself properly.

OK ASP-Z, to stop you from keep replying stubborn replies to my posts, let's just say that I'm neither proud nor ashamed of AS, but I don't enjoy having it.

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17 Nov 2010, 4:31 pm

Joe90 wrote:

Quote:

The economy's bad and so is the government, but Bill Gates has Asperger's too.

Become a weather girl maybe? You don't need to be clever to do that and it's related to your special interest. Boom.

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