To be brutally honest.

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Delphiki
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23 Jan 2013, 1:13 pm

Stoek wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

kamiyu910 wrote:

I'm pretty new here and am a bit confused by this post. I've seen a little negativity in reply comments to certain threads that had a feeling of... arrogance? The problem with online forums is that there is no tone, facial expressions to decipher, body language, or anything, so what one person thinks sounds reasonable could sound incredibly insulting to another. For the most part I just see people being people and I love it here.

I may be wrong, but it looks like there is a lot of miscommunication going on in this thread, especially with the definition or clarification of what negativity everyone is talking about. Are we talking about depressing posts or "you're stupid" replies?

this is worth quoting. OP, maybe you could clarify?

Without a doubt I agree that many here are not effected as strongly by negativity as are the regular population.
There is no denial of this, however the reality is for a large number of aspies this site is overwhelming.
If you cannot see this, I'm sorry I have no way of explaining this. It's simply a matter of perception that is simply more sensitive, than what is found here, if you lack this sensitivity there really is no way to explain it.

So you can't say why you are complaining, but you want it fixed.

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Stoek
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23 Jan 2013, 1:14 pm

Delphiki wrote:

How is this site harmful to the vast number of potential users? So someone could potentially use this site a few years from now, how is this site harming them?

My point there are many people that come here and simply find this site overwhelming. With negativity, my guess is that the depression caused by autism, and lesser sensitivities, make regular posters here feel much less adversely effected by this.

If you lack this sensitivity you cannot understand it I suppose. I'm sorry, my point is there is no room due to this insensitivity for many many people who would like to post here.

nessa238
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23 Jan 2013, 1:16 pm

Stoek wrote:

Delphiki wrote:

How is this site harmful to the vast number of potential users? So someone could potentially use this site a few years from now, how is this site harming them?

I really don't see it myself and think a poll is definitely in order

I'm exceedingly sensitive and that is why I understand that is is very important to give people who are feeling depressed and negative an outlet; somewhere to post where they will not be judged and told to stop being negative

Last edited by nessa238 on 23 Jan 2013, 1:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yuugiri
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23 Jan 2013, 1:16 pm

Stoek wrote:

I'm sorry, but that claim is insubstantial, and not worthy of consideration until further evidence is provided.

Stoek
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23 Jan 2013, 1:20 pm

nessa238 wrote:

Yes well I'm sure you're quite capable of notifying the moderators that a thread is in 'the wrong place'

That would be fine if moderators were trained professionals payed to sift through thread after thread.

This is not their full time job. You cannot put the pressure of this solely on them, there has to be some compliance by the posters themselves.

kamiyu910
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23 Jan 2013, 1:20 pm

Stoek wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

kamiyu910 wrote:

this is worth quoting. OP, maybe you could clarify?

Without a doubt I agree that many here are not effected as strongly by negativity as are the regular population.

There is no denial of this, however the reality is for a large number of aspies this site is overwhelming.

If you cannot see this, I'm sorry I have no way of explaining this. It's simply a matter of perception that is simply more sensitive, than what is found here, if you lack this sensitivity there really is no way to explain it.

But you didn't answer what kind of negativity we're talking about :/

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Delphiki
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23 Jan 2013, 1:20 pm

Stoek wrote:

Delphiki wrote:

How is this site harmful to the vast number of potential users? So someone could potentially use this site a few years from now, how is this site harming them?

My point there are many people that come here and simply find this site overwhelming. With negativity, my guess is that the depression caused by autism, and lesser sensitivities, make regular posters here feel much less adversely effected by this.

If you lack this sensitivity you cannot understand it I suppose. I'm sorry, my point is there is no room due to this insensitivity for many many people who would like to post here.

To become a regular poster wouldn't you have had to at first be someone who just came over here?

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nessa238
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23 Jan 2013, 1:21 pm

Stoek wrote:

nessa238 wrote:

Yes well I'm sure you're quite capable of notifying the moderators that a thread is in 'the wrong place'

I'm sure you'll tell them

'You're ruining my positive day with your negativity - get to the Haven right now!'
'And don't forget, I'm a very sensitive person!'

I'm sure that will cheer them up no end!

Stoek
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23 Jan 2013, 1:23 pm

kamiyu910 wrote:

But you didn't answer what kind of negativity we're talking about :/

Well since I'm clearly outnumber here.

Lets simplify things, and lets, say when a poster openly says there using this site for venting their frustrations, they are being negative.

In fact take negative out of the equation, and lets interchange it with venting.

The general page is too full of venting, not only on the threads that are openly shown to belong in the haven, but also when they crop up in threads where there was no invitation for such unloading.

If you need help identifying when your unloading I'd be more than happy to help you.

whirlingmind
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23 Jan 2013, 1:24 pm

Stoek wrote:

Without a doubt I agree that many here are not effected as strongly by negativity as are the regular population.

There is no denial of this, however the reality is for a large number of aspies this site is overwhelming.

If you cannot see this, I'm sorry I have no way of explaining this. It's simply a matter of perception that is simply more sensitive, than what is found here, if you lack this sensitivity there really is no way to explain it.

You still haven't stated how you come to know that you speak for this vast number of Aspies.

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nessa238
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23 Jan 2013, 1:25 pm

Stoek wrote:

kamiyu910 wrote:

But you didn't answer what kind of negativity we're talking about :/

You are just intolerant in my opinion and you assume others are as intolerant as yourself

I think you'll find you're wrong though

And what exactly do you think you're doing on this very thread if not venting?!

Delphiki
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23 Jan 2013, 1:26 pm

Stoek wrote:

kamiyu910 wrote:

But you didn't answer what kind of negativity we're talking about :/

Well since I'm clearly outnumber here.
Lets simplify things, and lets, say when a poster openly says there using this site for venting their frustrations, they are being negative.
In fact take negative out of the equation, and lets interchange it with venting.
The general page is too full of venting, not only on the threads that are openly shown to belong in the haven, but also when they crop up in threads where there was no invitation for such unloading.
If you need help identifying when your unloading I'd be more than happy to help you.

I thought you said venting was okay. (i can look through this thread for it possibly). Let's say a member doesn't have any friends, or any friends they can share stuff with, what should they do (this is not an out there example)? Most people vent irl with a close friend.

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answeraspergers
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23 Jan 2013, 1:27 pm

@ delafunction - Why do I submit myself to torture by trying to be positive on this site. I know the feeling and have the same question.
@Stoek & kamiyu910 – some valid insights from both
@hyperlexian – You continue to make nonsense insights, your awareness and reasoning must improve imo.

Im going to call it a day and go play tennis to escape the negativity and "teeth pulling" standard of debate

Stoek
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23 Jan 2013, 1:28 pm

Yuugiri wrote:

Stoek wrote:

I'm sorry, but that claim is insubstantial, and not worthy of consideration until further evidence is provided.

Actually my claim is very substantial, your on an autism support site, where insensitivity comes in many clinical forms, as well as co morbid with depression.

If one lacks a generally empathetic perceptions, it's near impossible for one to explain it to them if they lack that perception.

It's basic understanding of our condition.

Of course this is not one to one, there are many that are more adversely effected.

Yuugiri
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23 Jan 2013, 1:28 pm

Yuugiri wrote:

That doesn't entirely answer my question. What solutions do you have to bring to the table?

Still haven't answered this.

nessa238
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23 Jan 2013, 1:29 pm

answeraspergers wrote:

Bye

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